The Cost of Community 2 Timothy 4 9-22

What a delight to be back to be with you again. What a delight it was to be able to be a part of the conference this weekend. And I just want to echo the thanks that were offered to those who put it together and who work so hard as volunteers. And it does say a lot about the church when you see people serve in an event like we saw this weekend, and so thank you, thank you for that, and know that it meant more than you will you will ever know. People want to be a part of a community that sort of conducts itself the way that this community did, and so we thank God for that. And speaking of community this morning, I want to address that very topic and the costly call to community. And we have been called to community, and that's something that has become even more precious in recent days as we had you know, lockdowns and travel restrictions and everything else that sort of isolated us and cloistered us and didn't allow us in many ways and in many instances to experience community. It was interesting, as you know, restrictions were sort of lifted and as I would travel again, there were groups of people that I hadn't really thought about, but I was able to see how all of this hit them. You know, I'm traveling again and there are people who are, you know, checking me in for flights who hadn't been checking people in for flights. And you know, you get somewhere and you ride with a car service or a taxi, a person who's used to interacting with people from all over the world but hadn't been able to do that because that was shut down. And you go to a hotel and people are excited to be checking people in again because they weren't able to check people in. And you know, and you go to a restaurant, people are happy to be serving people again because they weren't able to do that. And it was just interesting to see all of these types of community that people have been robbed of. And we know that during that season, deaths of despair skyrocketed because we were made for community and we missed something. But more significant in all of that is a community that we experience and that we're called to as members of the Body of Christ, because we indeed are a community. We're going to be looking at two Timothy, chapter four, But as you turn there, there are a couple of other passages that I want to read for us first Peter Chapter two, verses nine and ten. But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light. Once you are not a people, but now you are God's people. Once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy. We are a people, we are a nation, we are a community. God calls us together, and we've become something that we were not, and we're called to live as community. Hebrews Chapter ten, verses twenty three to twenty five became very pertinent to us during these days, and many of us went back to this one passage of scripture over and over again as people tried to tell the church that the church couldn't gather, that the church couldn't do what the Church has been commanded to do. And we know that no one can forbid what God commands, or command what God forbids. But there's reason for this Hebrews Chapter ten, verses twenty three to twenty five. Let us hold fast to the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised, is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not nick colecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another. And all the more as you see the day drawing near. We are a community, and we're called to live in community. We're called to commune together regularly, and it means something. It's significant when we're not able to do that for whatever reason. First Corinthians, chapter twelve. In the Romans, chapter twelve, we can debate all day about the nature and continuation or secession of spiritual gifts, what they mean, and how or where they're supposed to operate. But what is not up for debate is that God gives us these gifts for purposes within our community. On Corinthians twelve twelve. For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ Romans twelve, Verses four and five. Whereas in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function. So we, though many are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another, we are members of one another. We belong to one another. Now, Unfortunately, when we use this word community, we often have in mind this idealized version of the word, and the world has this idealized version of community as well. Two of the most popular and longest lasting TV shows ever produced have everything to do with community. One of them is Friends or Don't act like you too holy to know what Friends is? Okay, I'm sure I don't understand what he's talking. No, you do? Friends? What was that about? That was about community? Right? It was about community. It was unrealistic, but it was about community. And the other one is going to press your Christianity even further because it's Cheers, which was about a bar. What it's about community? Right? It's about being able to walk into the bar and have everybody say norm right, because you belong to a community. The world longs for community, and as Christians, we are part of the community that the world cannot even fathom. And what they're looking for they won't find, but we have. We still tend to be unrealistic about community. We think that true Christian community is about finding a place where everybody thinks exactly like we do, where they never let us down, where they meet all of our needs and they never leave. And nothing can be further from the truth and Christian community. Not everybody thinks exactly like we do. If you can't say amen, you ought to say ouch, right, and people let us down. People don't meet all of our needs they weren't meant to. And people leave, sometimes for good reasons and sometimes for not so good reasons. And we often when we think of community, we don't think about the cost. We don't think about the risk, we don't think about the pain, we don't think about the disappointment, and we don't think about the betrayal that is inevitable. Consequently, because we're not realistic about community. Whenever we experience the risk and the pain and the disappointment or even the betrayal, what we often do is then to hop from community to community, trying to find the perfect community, trying to find the community where everybody thinks like us, trying to find the community where everybody meets all of our needs, trying to find the community where nobody ever hurts us, nobody ever disappoints us, and nobody ever leaves, and that community doesn't exist. So we hop around from community to community to community until eventually we realize that there's a common denominator and all of this disappointment, and that common denominator is me. It's me. Then there's the problem of the fake, false online community that we now learned to seek out, and that, by the way, I'm afraid that the church has entrenched because of many of our COVID responses. It's amazing. I hear the story over and over and over again of people, you know, who decided, Okay, fine, we'll just shut it all down and we'll just take everything online. And now all of a sudden, they're trying to revamp and get people from online, and people are like, no, I kind of like convenience and staying in my pajamas and not having to deal with people. I'll keep streaming, thank you very much. There are many churches who have died, literally have died. The church no longer exists because they streamed themselves out of existence. Online community is not real community. Celebrity pastors whose messages are polished and edited and create it for online consumption. That's not a real pastor. That's not your pastor. I'm heartbroken every day because every day I receive emails from people trying to make me their pastor. Every day I receive emails that go something like this, right, I just love your ministry. I listen to you all the time, you know, and I want to ask you this because I can't really ask my pastor. And I listen to you more than anybody else. So essentially, you're more like my pastor than my pastor. Is so or emails that say, you know, yeah, I listen to you all the time. And you know, I'm in Australia, or I'm in Nigeria, or I'm in Switzerland, or I'm in New York, or I'm in wherever? Can you mentor me? Can you be my mentor? Virtually online? And then they get hurt and disappointed and offended when I point out, listen, if I mentored disciple and counseled the thousands of people who email me, I wouldn't be able to be present and available for those with whom I'm in community. And if you say that, guess what the response is? Oh no, no, no, no, I get that. I know you can't do that for everybody, but just me? And what is that? That is our addiction to this fake, false online community. People dissatisfied with their own church and their own pastors, because they have this picture and this vision of this community that they have online that presents itself putting its best foot forward. They never disappoint you because it's not real. And this fake online world has made us more and more dissatisfied with our real, messy biblical communities. So what is it supposed to look like? We might not be happy with the answer, but if you lean into it, it'll be blessed by it. So if you turn with me to Second Timothy chapter four, Second tiventy chapter four, let's look at the second half of it. I've often said that, you know, Second Timothy chapter four is very similar to Ephesians chapter two, not in its content, but because in Ephesians chapter two, most people are very familiar with the first ten verses and can really can recite and quote most of you know those first ten verses, and not all of those first ten verses. But then verse eleven on with But there's good stuff in Ephesians two eleven and following right same thing here. We know these powerful first eight verses of Second Timothy chapter four, but there's good stuff in this second half that has a great deal to say about this costly call to community. So let's look at it. We'll read the second half of Second Timothy, chapter four, and then i'll lift just a few points from here. Do your best to come to me soon, for Demus and Love with this present world has deserted me and gone to Thessalonica. Crescence has gone to Galatia, tied us to Dalmatia. Luke alone is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is very useful to me in ministry Tichikus I've sent to Ephesus. When you come, bring the cloak that I left with karpas at Troas, also the books and above all the parchments. Alexander the coppersmith did me great harm. The Lord will repay him according to his deeds. Beware of him yourself, for he strongly opposed our message. At my first defense, no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me. May it not be charged against them. But the Lord stood by me and strengthened me, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the gentiles might hear it. So I was rescued from the lion's mouth. The Lord will rescue me from every evil deed, and bring me safely into his heavenly kingdom. To him be the glory forever and ever. Amen. Greet Prisca and Aquilla and the household of Honosphorus. Erastus remained at Corinth, and I left Trophemus, who was ill at Meliitus. Do your best to come before winter. Ubulus sends greetings to you, so do Pudence and Linus and Claudia and all the brothers. The Lord be with your spirit, Grace be with you. I love the ending of this letter, and it's interesting. I love it for a number of reasons. But one of the reasons I love it is because as an apologist, you know, doing apologetics, dealing with people who are making objections to, you know, the Gospel all the time. One of the things I love to point out to people who say, you know, no, these men just made this up and YadA, YadA, YadA, and so you know, these men are just inventing a religion. The end of these letters make it absolutely clear that these are not men writing in order to invent a religion. These are real men writing real letters to real people. And this is gritty stuff. At the end of two Timothy Paul's not trying to deceive anyone. The kind of vulnerability that we find in this letter is incredibly telling. But why is this call to community so costly? Because I think that's what we see from Paul here. Number one. I believe community is costly because it requires intimacy. It's costly because it requires intimacy. It's not the same as you know, going to a concert. And I think about that. Unfortunately a lot of people have turned church into just that kind of experience. Right. There's a group of people who gather together because there's a type of music that we like and an incredible band that does that type of music for us every week. And all of it is is we're just a group of people who share, you know, a desire for this same kind of music. We go to a concert. But you don't have to be intimate with people to go to a concert with them. You just you put on your concert t shirt. Right, we all love whatever band you know. You know, I haven't been to many concerts. You know, it would say a lot about me to tell you the concerts that I have been to. But you know, again, I remember experiences. I remember the first concert I ever went to. It was Prince the nineteen ninety nine tour. Oh, don't act like you're too spiritual to know about, but I remember that feeling. You know, you put on your T shirt. Everybody's got their Prince T shirt all, you know, and they come and there's thousands of people coming to the arena and we don't know one another, but everybody's smiling at each other, and everybody's excited because we're getting ready to go and have this experience. And all of us are you know, we have this like mindedness for this night and this night only because we're all getting ready to go to this concert and see Prince. That's not community. That's not lasting. Community is costly because it requires intimacy. Verse nine, do your best to come to me soon. And again verse nine, if you put it into its context, do your best to come to me soon. Just before this, Paul is alluding to the fact that he is likely to be executed, So don't just take that likely. I'm likely to be executed. I'm likely to die here for preaching the gospel. Do your best to come to me soon. There's a parenthetical statement there that's not in the text, and it would go like this, Do your best to come to me soon dot dot before they kill me. Verse thirteen. When you come, bring the cloak that I left with Karpus at Troas, and also the books and above all the parchments. Again, this is an intimate state. Bring me those precious things you come because you're precious, precious to me. And then bring me those other things that you know are precious to me. Verses nineteen to twenty one. Greet Prisca and Aquilla the household of honesty for us Erastus Mori Romannic court that left trophrom Us, who was ill at Militias. Do your best to come before winter. You will ascense his greetings. So the Prudence and Linus and Claudia and all the brothers. This is intimacy. This is intimacy. This is not a cold lead dead letter from a religious official. This is an intimate letter from one brother to another whom he dearly loves and desperately wants to see again before he dies. Look at the beginning of the letter. Go back to the beginning, Go back to chapter one. Paul an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God according to the promise of life that is in Christ Jesus. To Timothy, my beloved child. Again, that's not normal usual greeting to Timothy, my beloved child, my child, my son in the faith whom I love, Grace, mercy and peace from God the Father and from Christ Jesus, our Lord. I thank God, whom I serve as did my ancestors, with a clear conscience. As I remember you constantly in my prayers night and day, as I remember your tears, I long to see you that I may be filled with joy. That's intimacy. These are two brothers who've been in the trenches and who've shared blood, sweat and tears together for the sake of the gospel. Community is costly because it requires intimacy. Our real community is rooted in real intimacy. You don't create real intimacy overnight, and you don't throw it away over trivial matters. And that's why it's costly. And connected to that is the fact that it's risky. Community is not only costly because it requires intimacy, but it's costly because it requires risk. There's risk involved. Listen, if you don't get close to me, you can't hurt me. If I don't let you matter to me. You can't betray me, but real community requires that we take that risk. Look at verses ten through twelve. For Demas and love with this present world has deserted me and gone to Thessalonika. Now again, don't skip past this verse. Every word, everywhere in the text is important, and I want to read this for you again. But I want to read you what he didn't say, so that you can be impacted by the magnitude of what he did say. For Demus and Love with this present world has deserted Christ, that's not what he said. It's true that Demus has deserted Christ, and it matters that Demas has deserted Christ. But Paul is talking about his pain because Demus, in love with this world, deserted me. He continues, Crescence has gone to Galicia, tied us to Dalmatia. Luke alone is with me. Yet Mark and bring him with you, for he is very useful to me. For ministry Tichika's I have sent to Ephesus. This is not about selfishness. This is about intimacy and honesty and pain. Look at verse fourteen. Alexander the copper Smith did me great harm. The Lord will pay according to his deeds. Beware of him yourself, for he strongly opposed our message. At my first defense, no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me may not be charged against them. This is a man who has experienced great personal pain because of the great risk of community. Paul lists fifteen names in these eleven verses. Fifteen names. And that's one of the reasons we don't pay attention to this part of the passage, right. We get into this habit that when we run into lists of names in the Bible, we just kind of nod at him and go, okay, Lord, now you know, like we're gonna count this as being read. Right. But of these fifteen names, four of them Demus Cressns, Titus Titchikus had departed for one reason or another. Four mark Erastus Copris Trophemus had been left along the way. So for these Paul says they went somewhere. For these Paul says I left somewhere. One had betrayed and opposed him. The other six names just mentioned in passing. But these names are important. These names are important because these names, these names are brought up because of the painful reality of the risk that we take in community. And it's not just the people. It's not just Alexander the coppersmith. By the way, I love that I mentioned this at the conference too. I love this one. I love the fact that he doesn't just name names, but he gets specific. You know, Alexander, you know the coppersmith guy down there on Main Street around the corner from the flower shop. They're ready to tell you that guy. I want you, yeah, I want you to know exactly who I'm talking about. That's painful. Demus being in love with the world and abandoning him because he's in love with the world, that's painful. That's that's painful. In pastoral ministry, this is some of the most painful stuff that we deal with. People that we invest in and then they and then they leave. That's bad enough. But the people who we invest in and they don't just leave, but but they throw stones as they go. The pain of the betrayal it's incredible. And people can't be cruel. I remember, you know, there's this one group online, several groups online that have you know, been various versions of we hate voting and hope he dies dot com. But but this this one particular group online was really vicious. It's this group of of of Christian feminists and you know, they hate me because you know, all this patriarchy stuff that I represent, and you know, and I'm not writing my books and you know, these books about family and you know, and just you know, men and the toxic masculinity that just oozes apparently from every fiber of my being. And they just you know, and they would just they would just sit and write stuff, you know, and and you know, and usually whatever, but every once in a while these things would just really hurt my family. It's one thing, you know, and I roll up, you know, just let it go. It's me, I got big shoulders, whatever. But then sometimes my and I tell them, don't look at this stuff, don't pay attention to this stuff. But this one time it just got it just it just got my wife really riled up. So what happened is I'd shaved all my hair off and I had a lot more hair then, so it really meant something, right, and my hair was gone and one of this this feminist group they're like, you know, he's he's losing his hair, and you know, probably because of all the stuff that's going on because he's trying to hold on to his empire, and you know this and that, and I mean, they were just like vicious about you know, my hair being gone, you know, and people were like you just are you gonna let them get away with this? Are you gonna get it? I said, not a word, and my wife was like, no, you gotta no nothing. But it's why she was so bothered. She was so bothered because several months earlier, her sister, who was in Houston at the time, had breast cancer and was agonizing over the fact that she was about to start chemo and she was likely to lose her hair. And in my living room, I looked at my sister in law and I said, you you you lose yours, I lose mine. And so my sister in law, when her hair started falling out, sent me a picture and the next day I shaved all my hair off. And now these we hate Vodie and hope he dies dot com cackling hens or writing about how this, how this must be either God's judgment or this must be this or that you know, and and and everybody's like you you should just no, but but that's just that's just one little snapshot how how awful it can be. But that's not all that hurt, Paul. It's not just the betrayals, but it's it's even the ones who left for good reason. It's not just painful when people walk away from the faith. It's not just painful when people you know, leave the church and still throw throw stones on their way out. It's also painful when people who you love or hold elsewhere. That's painful too. And that's part of the risk. It's part of the risk. You know, Tim brought up my grandkids and you know what I said in the last service is oftentimes people will ask, you know, what was it hard for us to leave the US and and go to Zambia, And I say, with all honesty, that wasn't what was hard. It was hard was leaving my grandkids. That's what was hard. It was hard for our two older kids to see their parents and their seven younger siblings moved to Africa. That was that was hard. And we hadn't deserted the faith, we hadn't had a falling out, but the Lord had called us to another field to do a good work. And even that is painful. That's part of the risk of real community. It hurts when people leave, even for good and right reasons. We know this is parents, don't we all the tears at weddings, They're not all just because these young people have no idea what they're getting into. But you know what causes the most tears at weddings, what causes the most tears is here we are. And for all these years we've loved and we've nurtured, and we've taught, and we've mentored, and we've discipled, and we've known that this day was coming, and now this day is here, and like nothing else, this day says goodbye. Even if you're going to be around, even if you're going to be close, things are never going to be the same again. And that's painful. Community is costly, not only because it requires intimacy and it requires risk, but community is also costly because it's never going to be sufficient. It was never meant to be sufficient. I was never meant to have all of my needs met by another person. You were never meant to have all of your needs met by another person or another group of people. You were never meant to have all of your needs met by the church. If you're looking to have all of your needs met by another person or by the church. Two things are true. Number one, you're going to be disappointed, and number two, you're guilty of the sin of idolatry. God alone is meant to meet all of your needs. He uses other people in that process, but no single person, no single entity apart from God, is meant to meet all your needs, which means that whatever benefits we get from community, they will always be insufficient. There will never be enough because they were never meant to be enough. Look at verses seventeen and eighteen. But the Lord stood by me and strengthened me, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the gentiles might hear it. So I was rescued from the lion's mouth. The Lord will rescue me from every evil deed and bring me safely into his heavenly kingdom. To him be glory forever and ever I'm in. This is the perspective that allowed Paul to endure the pain and to respond to it appropriately. Look back at the text, for example, look back at verse fourteen again. Alexander the coppersmith did me great harm. The Lord will repay him according to his deeds. Now look give verse sixteen. At my first defense, no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me. May it not be charged against them. He's hurt, but he's not bitter. Don't miss that. He's hurt and the hurt is real, but he's not bitter. He's not vindictive, he's not striking out. He's not repaying evil for evil. He's trusting in the Lord to vindicate him. He's trusting in the Lord to make all things right. Because, yes, that hurt, but you were not meant to meet all my needs. Yes, that hurt, but you are not the be all to end all to my community. Yes that upset me, but my world has not fallen apart because of what you did. Because community is important, but it will never be sufficient. Christ is sufficient. He captures this well. And Philippians turned with me to Philippians Chapter one, and I think we really get insight into Paul's theological foundation that allowed him to respond to pain without becoming bitter and without striking back. About becoming cynical, because that's what that's what happens to many of us. We become bitter, we become cynical. We strike back, and we begin to say, you know what, I love Jesus, but I'm done with the church. I'm done with those people. Those people let me down, those people disappoint me. I'm out of here. How is it? How is it that Paul could be honest about the fact that he's been hurt, he's been betrayed, he's been abused, and yet not be bitter and trust the Lord and do it again. Raise up these young men, Pour his life into these young men, have a loving relationship with these young men, be encouraged by the fellowship with these young men, and then open his hand and let them go experience that pain, and then go do it again. Experience that pain, and then go do it again. Give us life away to a man like Demus. And then Demus leaves not only him, but leaves the faith. And he turns around, and he does it again and again and again and again, without becoming bitter, without becoming cynical, without becoming vengeful and vindictive. How why Philippians Chapter one, beginning of verse eighteen. Yes, and I will rejoice, for I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, this will turn out for my deliverance, as it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that will with full courage now as always, Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me to live as Christ and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose, I cannot tell. I am heart pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account. You see, Paul did not see his life, or he did not see the community or the sense of community as existing for him. He saw him as existing for the community famous John F. Kennedy quote. Right, Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country. Ask not what the community can do for you, but what you can do for the community. And that's our problem. That's why we don't have Paul's disposition when pain and heartache and disappointment and betrayal comes, because we walk into this thinking the community exists for me, What can you do for me? What of my needs can you meet? How can you satisfy me? And then when the community doesn't do all of those things, we say, I'm done with you, I'm out of here. I'm going to find somebody else who can satisfy me and meet my needs. And over and over and over again we go. Paul says, no, no, no, no, no. This is the body of Christ. I am here to serve the body of Christ. I love the Lord Jesus, and I'll be with him someday, and some days I even prefer to be with him. But he's left me here because there's work for me to do for his body. Paul, why do you keep doing this again and again and again because I'm serving the Lord Jesus Christ and I'm serving his body. Yeah, but look at what happened with Demus, and look at what happened with Alexander, to which Paul would probably respond, yes, but look at what happened with Timothy, and look at what happened with Titus. Look at what the Lord did, Look at what the Lord did, and even beyond that, how dare I complain about pain and heartache and disappointment and betrayal when I'm serving the body of Christ. Christ, who suffered pain and heartache and disappointment and betrayal to the point of death on the cross to die for his bride, to rescue his bride from her own sin. Christ looks at the bride and he says, she is worthy of my very life. How can I then turn and look at the bride and say she is not worthy because she disappoints me. She's not worthy because she let me down. She's not worthy because she doesn't meet all of my needs. How dare how dare you? This is the bride for which he laid down his life and died, and we get to be a part of her, and we get to serve her, and we get to commune with her, and we get to strengthen her, and we get to be strengthened by her, all for the sake of advancing the kingdom, so that Christ may indeed have the fullness of the reward for which he died. What's not worth that? What price is too high to pay for that? You saying nasty stuff about me online? Listen, listen, here's the deal for all of the we hate voting and hope he dies dot com people out there. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, the worst stuff that you can make up about me is probably not nearly as bad as the true stuff that you could learn. And if you can't say that, you're not being honest about who you are. But at the end of the day, may Christ be glorified, and may he be praised for the beautiful gift of his body for us on the cross, his body in us by faith, and his body among us in the church. When we grasp that, then we will embrace the costly call to community. Let's pray our gracious God and the heavenly Father, the Father of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. We come before you as your people, as a community of faith, gathered in your name, gathered in the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ, gathered in the power of his Spirit and the communion of his Spirit, gathered to offer you praise as one body, who together are capable of offering you that which none of us individually could offer. And so do we praise you. And we thank you for your goodness and for your grace, and for your mercy, and for the great gift that is the Church, the Body of Christ. Grant that we might love her, cherish her as Christ does. Grant that she might be prized among us. And Grant that in the midst of our pain and disappointment, discouragement and even despair, that we might be reminded that Christ will perfect his bride, that Christ will present his bride holy and without blemish before him. And Grant that we might ensure that we might rejoice in that, that we might anxiously anticipate it, and that we might view the bride through that lens and not through the lens of our pain and disappointment. Grant that in our pain we might not be bitter, vindictive, cynical, but that instead we would be hopeful. This we ask in Christ's name and for his sake. Amen.