Leading As A Husband & Father

Well, good morning. Praise God for another day and another opportunity to worship Him. If you have your Bibles with you this morning, we will open up to where we left off on last night in the Book of Ephesians. We're going to look today at Ephesians, chapter five and chapter six. Today we address the issue of a man's leadership in his home, his leadership of his family. This is a crucial topic for in fact, a man's leadership in his home is pivotal not only to the church, but also to the state. Was Manton who said that the home is the seminary of both the church and the state. The home is the place where leaders for the church are forged. In fact, a man is to be examined for leadership in the church by first looking at his track record of leadership in his home. It is a man's leadership in his family that is foundational to determining whether or not he is even qualified for leadership among God's people. This is crucial. It is also the home that is the place where citizens are forged for the state. The state has no charge, no responsibility, or no jurisdiction over children informing them as future citizens. It is the home that is charged with this duty, with this responsibility. It is the home that forges the character of future leaders, in the state where we learn to follow and where we learn to lead. So it is absolutely critical that we look here in Ephesians chapter five and six and see what it actually means for a man to lead in his home. First, listen to this from James Alexander speaking about the issue of a man and his leadership in his home. He is their head. He is such by a divine and unalterable constitution. These are duties and prerogatives which he cannot alienate it alienate. There is something more than mere precedents in age, knowledge, or substance. He is the father and the master. No act of his and nothing in his character can fail to leave a mark on those around him. A man is the head, master and lee of his home, and there's nothing he can do about that. He will be the lead effectively, or he will lead poorly, but he will lead. A man's failing to lead is actually a man leading in failure. This is not optional. There are, however, objections to the idea of a man leading in his home. There are those objections, of course, that we would not be surprised by in the culture at large, we know that the feminist movement has huge problems with what I've just said, the idea that the man is the head of his household, that the man is the leader in his family. Ari Houkiman, a leader in the United Nations Population Fund, has in fact referred to the breakdown in the family in the West as a triumph. It's a good thing, he argues. Why would a man say something like this? Ari Hoykuman actually argues, is that high divorce rates, out of what locked birth rates actually signal a triumph of human rights over patriarchy. In other words, male headship in the home is oppressive, and divorce and out of what locked birth rates represent liberation from that oppression. Again, it's almost unfathomable that anyone would say such a thing, let alone a leader of the United Nations. But if you're troubled by that, you don't know much about the United Nations. All Right, I said that out loud, did not oh came up back. Other radical feminists feel the same way. Linda Gordon, for example, Listen to this statement. The nuclear family must be destroyed and people must find better ways of living to get whatever it's ultimate meaning. The breakup of families now is an objectively revolutionary process. No woman should have to deny herself any opportunities because of her special responsibilities to her children. Families will be finally destroyed only when a revolutionary social and economic organization permits people's needs for love and security to be met in ways that do not impose divisions of labor or any external roles at all. That's radical. But wait, there's more, Andrea Dwarkin. Under patriarchy, no woman is safe to live her life, or to love, or to mother children. Under patriarchy or male headship, every woman is a victim, past, present, and future. Under patriarchy, every woman's son is her potential betrayer and also the inevitable rapist or exploiter of another woman. That's our cultural context. But you say that's out there. Certainly, that's the radical feminist people who don't even claim to know God. But there are also objections in here. Evangelical feminism, as it is euphemistically called, has objections to the idea of male leadership and male headship in the home. There are three basic objections, and we have to deal with these before we move forward. With this text here in Ephesian chapter five. And the reason that we have to deal with these is quite simple because they have gained much headweight in the church, and there are many in the church, even in churches that you would consider, you know, run of the mile conservative evangelical churches, some of these ideas have crept in and have become assumed for many of you as students. You assume some or all of this about the idea of male headship, that somehow it's an archaic concept, that somehow it's anachronistic for us to talk about men as heads of their household and to look at passages like Ephesians chapter five in that context. Three main arguments I'll give them to you and then we'll address them in turn. One the culture, two the curse, and three the confusion. Those are the three arguments. The first argument is the culture that Paul's admonition to male headship and Ephesians chapter five, and they have to deal with Ephesians chapter five. By the way, you give this just no way around it. You cannot assault this idea of male headship and the home without somehow dealing with Ephesians chapter five. So evangelical feminism deals with the Fgians chapter five, and the first line of argumentation is this is cultural that Paul here in Ephesians chapter five is merely making a cultural statement because of circumstances on the ground, as it were. Now. The problem with this argument is that the Bible teaches male headship and the home in a number of places, not only Ephesians five, but also Colossians three and one, Peter three, as well as Titus two and five. All of these places we see men called to lead as heads of their household and women called to submit to the leadership of their husbands. But more importantly and more foundational to this is the teaching in Genesis chapters one through three, which solidify the idea of male headship. So there is no way that what Paul teaches in Ephesians chapter five is merely some cultural accommodation that calls for male headship in this particular setting and circumstance, and does not see male headship as the norm. This, for example, does not take into consideration Paul's teaching in one Coristians chapter eleven, where he says the head of the woman is the man, the head of every man as Christ and the head of Christ is God. We also see in First Timothy chapter two that Paul roots male headship in the creation order. Not only do we see that argument, but also the argument of the curse that actually what we're dealing with here is male headship as a result of the curse. In Genesis chapter three and verse sixteen, when God looks at Eve, or it looks at the woman before she was named Eve and says that because of what she's done, the consequence will be that her desire will be for her husband, but he will rule over you. That's the idea that when God says that in Genesis chapter three and verse sixteen, you have male headship established as a byproduct of the curse. Listen to this. Her curse now was to be ruled perversely, to long for her husband and he to rule over her. She would want to be dominated by her husband, and he would submit to this desire. God does not command Adam to rule or govern his wife. Rather, the curse is Eve's. The ruling is a consequence of Eve's longing and her fall. That's the argument from even deelical feminism that this is a product of the fall. Now, there are a couple of problems with this. If this is a product of the fall, my first question is why do we find in Ephesians five, in Colossians three, in Titus two this same allusion to male headship referring to people who are in Christ who have been redeemed from the curse. If it's just a product of the fall, here's my second question to those who would argue that male headship is a product of the fall. My second question is this. Have you been in the delivery room with a Christian woman giving birth? You go, what does that have to do with anything? Well, okay, think about this. Male headship is a product of the fall. Therefore, when we are in Christ, that curse is removed and we no longer have male headship. But God also said to Eve there would be much pain in her childbearing. So if logically becoming a Christian removes the curse, there are to be screaming in the delivery room of non believers, and peace and calm in the delivery room of believers. I know better. I was there. I have heard the famous you did this to me. I have watched the woman whom I love with every fiber of my being turn into a creature who looked at me with eyes that said, if you I'm too close, I will kill you. Now wipe my forehead. The other problem here is that we see male headship before the fall. We see male headship. For example, in Genesis chapter two, the woman was made after the man male headship. The woman was made for the man. I will make him a helper suitable for him. Male headship. The woman was made from the man male headship. The woman was brought to the man male headship, and the woman was named by the man male headship. And if that's not enough for you, all you have to do is go later on in chapter three when Adam receives his curse, and God says, because you have listened to the voice of your wife, because you did not exercise your headship. If that's not enough for you, just go to Romans chapter five. Or Paul doesn't say, because of the sin of one couple Adam and Eve death under the world. No, because of the sin of one man Adam, Jesus is not referred to as the last Adam and Eve. He's referred to as the last Atam. Why male headship, So what's happening there? In Genesis three sixteen with the curse, I'm glad you asked. God says, your desire will be for your husband, but he will rule over you. Now, Fortunately, our evangelical feminist author here completely misses the nuance of that text. She says that somehow the woman is going to be pining for her husband. If you just go to Genesis, chapter four and verse seven, you see the identical phrase God says to Cain and Genesis four seven, Sin is crouching at your door. Its desire is for you, but you must rule over it. God is not saying to Cain, sin is yearning and pining for you, Oh, it loves you. No, he is saying, sins desires to overtake you, and you must rule over it. See, the curse is not male headship. The curse is the woman's natural rebellion to the headship of the man. That's the curse. Your desire will to usurp your husband's authority, and yet his authority will not be removed. And because of this desire there should be a clash between you and your husband. But in this clash, creation order will not be overturned. He will rule over you. That's the nuance there. In Genesis chapter three and verse sixteen. Male headship is not invented in Genesis chapter three. It is reinforced in Genesis chapter three. But the clash against male headship is what we see as a product of the fall. There is a third argument, and that is the argument of the confusion that we have completely and utterly misinterpreted this passage here in Ephesians chapter five, because we have forgotten verse twenty one. If you look with me, there in five loogat verse twenty one, and it reads submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. So here's the argument, and you find this even in just very conservative circles. The argument is that because of verse twenty one, what we have is the idea of mutual submission between husband and wife. We don't have the idea of male headship male leadership within the context and confines of the home. But we have the idea of mutual submission of believers to one another, and they just have sort of different roles within this mutual submission, but the submission is mutual. That's the argument that we've completely mistaken what Paul meant to say, because we have not paid close enough attention to verse twenty one in our assertion of male headship. First let me give you my technical theological response, and then we'll look at this exegetically. My technical theological response to that assertion is not. But let's do a little exegetical work here, shall we. Couple of problems. One problem is the verb that is used here submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. In verse twenty one, wives submit to your own husbands. Now, that verb there in verse twenty two is the verb carried over from verse twenty one. One basically says wives to husbands. And the verb there is hupo tasso. So it's actually a military term. And this military term refers to the voluntary submission of an inferior officer to a superior officer, or to a soldier, or of a soldier to a superior officer. That's what the verb means. It means that you submit to someone because of their rank. You submit to them because of the office that they hold. The problem with the idea of mutual submission is that it doesn't work with this verb. There is no mutual submission in military ranks. The captain does not come to the private and say private, there are some things that I'd really like to discuss with you. I really think we need to take that hill over there. But I know we're called to submit to one another mutually, So I'd really like to discuss with you private whether or not you feel like charge that hill over there as we mutually submit to one another. Private thing coming back and saying Captain, I really appreciate that. I really appreciate you honoring this mutual submission agreement that we have to one another. There's a machine gun up there, and I just really think, maybe, no, not the way the military works. How does the military work. Superior officer gives order, inferior salutes and executes. That's how the military works. It is not mutual submission, and that's the term. The term does not allow for the mutual submission interpretation. There is another problem. The second problem is that this mutual submission clause, supposed mutual submiss clause and Ephesians five twenty one does not exist in Colossians three, does not exist in First Peter three, does not exist in Titus two. So elsewhere where we have the headship of the husband and the submission of the wife, we do not have this mutual submission clause. So here's what evangelical feminism argues. You don't take all of these texts together and read them the way they normally read in all of their senses. You take this one text that has what appears to be a mutual submission clause, and you then superimpose that clause on your reading of all the other texts. That's the argument. Doesn't work that way hermeneutically in anything else that we do, but in this particular instance, that's what we're supposed to do. There is a third problem, and it's the immediate context broader context problem. In order for us to understand this, and we're going to get to Ephesian chapter five and mail headship, but trust me, this is necessary. The third problem is when you go back to this text and put it in context. Ephesians chapter five and verse twenty one is the end of a paragraph. I don't know about you, but generally when I start reading something, I go to the beginning of paragraphs, not the end. Maybe you do that me, I go to the beginning of paragraph. So Ephesian chap Verse twenty one is the end of a paragraph that begins in Ephesians chapter five and verse fifteen. When we get there, here's what we find very interesting. We have three commands. On the third command, you get excuse me, go to verse fifteen with me, three contrasts. I'm sorry, like, why is that not what I'm talking about? We get three contrasts on the third excuse, I'm sorry, just had a senior moment. There we have three contrasts. On the third contrast, you get three commands, and on the third command you get three contexts. All right, look at the beginning of verse fifteen. Let's look at these three contrasts. Look carefully, then, how you walk, not as unwise, but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. So there's a contrast, not unwise, but wise. The second one. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. There's the second contrast. First one, not unwise, but wise, the second one not foolish, but understanding the will of the Lord. Here's the third contrast. Do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the spirit. There's the third contrast. On the third contrast, you get three commands. Three commands as to how to fill the third contrast. Look at verse nineteen. First addressing one another in psalms, hymn, spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with all your heart. There's the first command, the first command related to what the third contrast is, how you live that spirit filled life. What's the second command, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. There's your second command created correlated to what that third contrast. Here's how you do it. This is the spirit filled life. And then there's the third command. Submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. That's the third command as it relates to the contrast of the spirit filled life versus drunk with wine. On the third command, you get three contexts. What are they? Wives to husband five twenty four to the end of the chapter, children to parents six to one through four, slaves to masters six' five through. Nine in other, Words ephesians five twenty one is not the umbrella over the rest Of ephesians chapter. Five it's actually the umbrella Over ephesians five twenty two through six.' nine and here's why, that's important because in all of those relationships the husband, wife relationship the verb used there is not a mutual submission verb in the parent child relationship not. Mutual submission children are called to hearken to the voice of. Their parents parents are not called to submit to. Their children and in the third one slaves, and masters masters are not called to submit to. Their slaves slaves are called to submit to. Their masters so in each one of, these contexts submission works in. One direction there is a person who is, the head and there's a person who's called to submit to the one who is. The, head therefore because of all of, these things the idea that We've misunderstood paul's teaching here about the husband and his headship in his home is not an acceptable explanation for. The, text instead what we Get is paul is very clear, and unambiguous and the husband is to exercise headship in. His Household now here we have the. Household codes whenever you see the, household codes, for example if we Go to colossians, chapter one or if we Go To first peter, chapter three or if we go To tie this, chapter two always either right before or right after you have husband, and wife you have children, and parents and you have slaves. And masters these are household. Old codes so the first thing we see about a man's leadership in his household is this that a man's leadership in his household goes to his government of all the affairs of. HIS home a man's leadership in his household goes to the government of all the affairs in. His, Home, first yes there is the idea of a man in his headship and his leadership with. His, wife unfortunately for many, of us that's sort of where. We stop the whole thing is about who is the man the head of. His, marriage yeah the man's ahead of, his marriage but please don't. Stop there the man is also the head of his household as it relates to the training and discipleship of, his children which means men cannot and must not abdicate when it comes to the training and discipleship of. Their children here's the. Great irony the great irony is we have men who want to stand up and pound. Their Chests the, BIBLE says i am. THE head i am the head of. My marriage so when my WIFE and i have, A disagreement i have the. Last word, hey rah good. For you let me ask, you this are you the chief and principal discipler of. Your children, We'll see we'll see when my WIFE and i when when when we when, we're when when we're Trying To i'm i'm the boss. Of her have you laid a roadmap for how your children learned to believe the right things in order that they might be transformed By? THE gospel i, would see you would See, the Yeah the bible says that, my wife she's supposed. To see that's where we want. To end but the, text, says fathers do not provoke your children, to anger but bring them up in the discipline and instruction Of. The lord does this mean that my wife doesn't have a role to play in the discipleship of. My, children no any more than it means if my wife doesn't have a role to play in any of the other aspects of our. Family life but the idea here IS that i am to exercise headship when it comes to the discipleship of. My children we have, Lost this we have. Missed this and let me say a word in particular to those of you who are considering. The ministry there has been an idea in. Generations past you take Care of god's Business and he'll take care of. Your family the same idea is the idea that has allowed evangelists to be world renowned while they, spend, three, four five six months at a time away from their families and the name of Serving. The lord this attitude has been the excuse for pastors who devote their lives to taking care of the problems in everyone else's household while they neglect. Their family so commonly that we have a phrase called THE p k which refers to, these, neglected, untrained undisciplined undiscipled children who grew up in pastors households but were not. Disciple there and, it's sin pure. And simple my, first calling my first ministry is To be, bridget's Husband And, Jasmine, Trey, Elijah Asher, judah Micah and. Sophia's, father yep, this many that's. My job go and make the Disciples of panta tapes every. People group we love that. Great commission don't we baptize them in the name Of, The, father Son The, holy spirit teaching them to observe all the Things that i've. Taught you let me ask, you this HOW dare i do that out there and not do it? At home HOW dare i disciple your children and fail to. Disciple mine that is my duty as. A father this, last one we're uncomfortable with this idea of a father and his headship in the context of a slave. Master relationship let me explain this. To you and this one it used to be difficult for me. As well there's a family in our church who got an opportunity to move To The, middle east and they're In The. Middle east this individual is. A pilot he was recruited by an airline over In The. Middle east there in the country where, they live it is common for households to. Have servants in fact that you can't find a place to rent there that doesn't have servants. Quarters attached it is just. Absolutely come it's the air, they breathe it's the way. Things, are well he's there for a, little while and, you know, we're skyping we're keeping up with, one ANOTHER and i have had two opportunities now to go and visit with them there In The middle east and to, preach there and it's. Been incredible but here's what began. TO happen i began to get these messages from him and we began to Talk on skype about the incredible things that were going on with, their maid, their servant this woman from another country who is In That middle eastern country basically to serve as a servant as. A housemaid the airline that hired him pays him a salary also pays for them to have, a housemaid and some incredible things began, to happen like they began to invite their maid and her husband into their household with them for family worship, every day and as a result, of It This sri lankan maid and her husband. Were converted not only Was This sri lankan maid and her, husband converted But Other sri lankan maids began to hear about the relationship that this woman had with her master as they, call them and would just sort of show up around the house from time. To time and when they showed up around, the house they would be invited to join the family and. Family worship and so long, story short my first trip to go visit them In The, middle east first opportunity to go and preach there A number i had the privilege of going out into the Ocean in dubai And The United. Arab immirates here's The. Birds dubai you know that huge hotel that looks like the sale of. A boat i'm standing in the shadow of, A. Bird Dubai there's, muslims eirwhere, not, everywhere airwhere that's. Beyond everywhere. All right they're at the beach with the hijab on the whole nine YARDS and i walk out into the Ocean Baptizing sri lankan maids. And BUTLERS can i just tell you the church? REAL quick i, was scared thanks people going to. Drown me what an incredible? Testimony is people came over to ask what's? Going on? The household codes a man shepherding, his wife his children and, his Servants and god blessing. The work male leadership in the home. Is comprehensive you're responsible to set the trajectory for your entire household in the time that. We have let me say THIS because i want this to. Be clear male headship in the home is not something that is achieved. Through domination it's something that. Requires submission, in fact look with me beginning of verse, twenty four verse. Twenty two. I'm sorry notice he doesn't say husbands make your. Wives submit he says in verse twenty, two wives submit to your own husband's as To, the lord for the husband is the head of. The wife Even as christ is ahead of, the church his body and Is himself. It's savior now as the church Submits, to christ so also wives should submit in everything to. Their husbands this is not something that's forced on. A wife this IS why i say to, young men if you find a young woman that you're interested in and she, is, unsubmissive run do, not, pass go do not collect two hundred dollars get. Out now by, the WAY when i say, SHE'S unsubmissive i don't mean she submissive, to you because she's not called to be submissive. TO you i get that. Sometimes too, you know, my girlfriend she's not really submissive. To me my response to that complaint is always good. For, her yeah but she's supposed to, be, Submissive right yeah to. Her husband put a ring on. Her finger have you married, her yet then she must not submit. To you well wait. A minute if she's not supposed to submit to me until i'm, her husband then HOW will i know if? She's submissive watch her with? Her? Father why because that's the only context wherein she is now commanded to submit to. Male, headship yeah but you don't know her father's relationship. WITH her i. Don't, care yeah well. YOU know i mean they're just like special. Mitigating circumstances REALLY because i, don't care because a daughter's submission to her father is not based on her, Father's worthiness it's Based on. God's command now HERE'S what i want to, ask. You sir what makes you think that this woman will find an excuse not to submit to the man who gave her birth and shelter. And food but somehow you're gonna be so fine that she'll just gladly submit. To you you better. Wake up if she doesn't submit to her father because her father, is flawed then she will not submit to you, because, you, too sir. Are flawed and if you marry an, unsubmissive woman you're in a world. Of hurt how you what are you? Gonna do are you're gonna arm wrestle her for leadership in? Your home the, next, context children obey your parents And, the lord for this. Is right honor your father. And mother this is the, first commandment with the promise that they may go well with you and that you may live in. The land children are called and commanded to submit to their parents the command It to It is god who. Calls this when it comes to slaves in, their masters go down to. Verse five slaves obey your earthly masters with fear and trembling with a, sincere heart as You. Would christ so in each of, These contexts god does, not, say sir you are the head of. Your household you must rule with an iron fist and force everyone in your home to bow the knee. To you. Absolutely not the idea is that they submit to you out of Reverence. For god so if someone is not submitting to you within the context of, your household, first thing meaning to know this, is universal your head sip in. Your, household secondly it requires submission from those under. Your leadership but how do they achieve that by you? Shepherding them, that's how by you. Shepherding them what do you do with? Your wife go back to five point. Twenty, five husbands love your Wives as. Christ Love the church gave himself up for her that he might, sanctify her having cleansed her by the washing of water with, the word so that he might Present the church to himself and splendor without spot or wrinkle or any such thing that she might be holy and, without blemish in the same way husbands ought to love their wives as their. Own bodies when men come to me, and, say oh my wife has a, Submission, problem, okay fine she has a, submission problem and she has to deal with That. Before god but let me ask you. A question are you? Discipling her she being washed with the water Of. The word are you bringing the true Truths Of god's word to bear in her life so that she is being built up and sanctified? In him are you living, with Her as peter Says In first, peter three, chapter three, verse seven in an, understanding manner as with a. Weaker vessel are you praying? For her are you falling on your face before A holy god begging him to sanctify? Your wife or are you merely pointing your finger at her saying you are? Not submitting with, your children how do you get? Them, there fathers do not provoke your children, to anger but bring them up in the discipline and instruction Of. The lord are you discipling? Your children is your discipline designed to bring them to the cross or merely to? Outward obedience with your servants the good, Verse nine masters do the same, to them stop, your threatening Knowing that he who is both their master and yours is in heaven and that there is no partiality. With him are you conducting yourself as a Follower Of jesus christ And bringing god's word to bear in all the relationships within the context and confines of, your home that the result might be that your discipleship would bear fruit in the lives of everyone Over whom god has given. You charge and how different is this? From? Me man, you woman, me speak? You do this is the picture of biblical leadership in the context and confines of. The home this is what it means for a man to lead in. His household there's a final, piece here and the final piece here goes back to what we spoke about on. Last, night remember this is all About, what christ his body and, its unity the Glory of christ manifested in, his body, the church and in. Its unity that's what we see in the indicative half Of the Book, of ephesians those first. Three chapters now we get to the imperative half Of the Book, of ephesians these last. Three chapters and remember. These imperatives we have the ability to accomplish these imperatives because Of what christ has done. In us we've seen that in the first, three chapters and we are motivated to accomplish These imperative why because of our desire as Followers of christ To see his glory manifested and magnified in those Places where he has given. Us dominion so what's? Your desire what's my desire when it comes to my wife and my headship being exercised there here it is my relationship with my wife is, a living breathing illustration of the Relationship Between jesus christ And. HIS church i desire to exercise biblical christ honoring headship in my marriage because it is a Picture, of christ and for me not to exercise that kind of headship in my marriage is a blasphemous act Against my Lord and Savior, And Master. Jesus christ my desire for my wife to submit to me is not just SO that i can, feel powerful but my desire is centered around the fact that she has called to submit to me As, to christ that her submission to me is actually an act of Worship. Toward christ so a wife who is not submissive to her husband has a. Worship disorder first, and foremost my headship with my wife centers around my desire for her to be sanctified and built up as a Member of. Christ's body but not only is she a Member of, Christ's body she's a member of my body in this mysterious one. FLESH union i don't know who first said it, to ME but i keep it in. My mind she's not, just mine. She's me she's not. Just mine. She's me is bone of my bone and flesh of. My flesh so my desire is to see her built up because she's a member of the Body, of CHRIST and i desire his body to be built up and for him to fill. ALL things a desire for our unity has to do with the fact that she's a member of my body. As well we are. One flesh she's not, just mine. She's, me also this picture that we paint of the Relationship between christ And his church has an impact first and foremost on, our children who see this on a, daily basis but secondly on, our servants who also see this on a. Daily basis so there is this picture of the truth Of the gospel that we proclaim that is being lived out in the context of this. Marriage relationship it does not replace. The gospel it is not, the gospel but it reinforces the message of. The gospel that changes, My focus that changes. My everything when a man comes to me, And says, I'M finished i can't do. It anymore. I'm leaving where, you? Going sir you can't? Do, THAT yes. I, can't no. You can't you're her head head can't leave. The body you don't want to running? Around HEADLESS why i don't understand. All that i'm. Just, leaving no you can't leave where. You're going go love. Your wife you're commanded to love. Your wife husbands love. Your Wives just christ Love. The church my desire for my children is what that my children would come To. Know christ fathers do not provoke the children, of anger but bring them up in the discipline and instruction Of. The lord what is my desire with? My children that they would make me proud and become doctors and lawyers and quarterbacks. And whatever my desire for my children is that they Walk. With god my desire first and foremost is that they would. Be saved my desire is that they Would, know christ and that desire must lead all. Other desires everything else must take a back seat. To that why first half of The, book christ his body and the. UNITY thereof i want my children to be part of the Body. OF christ i want my children to. BE redeemed I want christ to be glorified as my children come to Faith. IN him i Want the father to be glorified As the son give my Children to him as a gift that is then reciprocated Because the father first entrusted them. To HIM and i know that this happens through the proclamation Of. The GOSPEL so i Preached the gospel to my children again and again. And again and my desire for their obedience to my headship has to do with Them, knowing christ not with. IMPRESSING you i want. THEIR hearts i want Them. Saved god mather also made an Argument that i've just never been able to get. Away from, he says as you look at, your children remember that that sin nature from which they need to be delivered was Inherited from adam. Through you you gave it. To them rid them of it if. You can they suffer on the curse directly. Through you do everything that you can to deliver them. From, that oh how many parents have fallen on their Face before god praying that their child would get into the, right school but have not spent one Hour begging god that their child might get. INTO heaven i want my children saved first, and foremost and so my headship and my leadership and my home as it relates to, my children must center around this desire above and before, all else that they Might know christ in the pardon of. Their sins this is. Real headship why is? This important why is it important that we know the opposition that is. Out there why is it important that we fight for. This ground here's why it's important that we fight for. This ground first, And foremost it's important that we fight for this ground because people are not just arguing, against us they're Arguing. AGAINST god i don't write, THE mail i just. Deliver it and it is important that we refute those who contradict Sound doctrine titus. One nine that is my job to refute those who contradict. Sound doctrine here's the second reason that this. Is important if the picture of male headship in the home is an illustration of the Relationship between christ and, his church then anything that would mar that image is actually working to profane the Truth. About christ we can't have that here's the. Other problem god has designed marriage to function in a way that brings glory to his name and that fulfills, his design and that design centers around. Male headship if we undermine this, fundamental truth we begin to Undo all so what do. We see we see marriages that are shipwrecked because of a failure to understand. This issue we see wives that wrestle with and run away from submission to, their husbands listening to and sounding more like. The feminists we see men who have no idea whatsoever what real, headship is which results in either passivity in men where they completely fade to, the background or hyper masculinity in men where they turn, into rambo neither of which. Is acceptable the idea is for biblical. MALE headship a man who understands, his role doesn't back down from, his role doesn't apologize for, his role and is terrified because he understands the magnitude of. His responsibility that's. The picture now you go and. Do likewise, Let's, pray father thank you that you have not left us to wander aimlessly in, the dark but has spoken clearly to the most pertinent issues in our lives and to our deepest needs grant that we might hear and heed your Truth for, christ's sake for, his glory for. His. Honor amen