Stop Counting on People

0:00:00.920 --> 0:00:02.600 Victoria and I believe in you're going to have a 0:00:02.640 --> 0:00:06.200 blessed summer. Praying for you guys every day, and thanks 0:00:06.240 --> 0:00:09.000 for being with us today. Hey, I'm excited. Victoria's got 0:00:09.039 --> 0:00:11.280 a new book out. It's called Grace to Go, and 0:00:11.400 --> 0:00:14.480 I know it's going to bless you. I'm excited because 0:00:14.480 --> 0:00:17.640 in this book you will see how you are strengthened, 0:00:17.960 --> 0:00:21.040 that you are prepared and you are ready for anything 0:00:21.120 --> 0:00:23.919 that's in front of you. You are grace to go. 0:00:24.480 --> 0:00:28.960 Enjoy today's message. Well, God bless you. It's great to 0:00:29.000 --> 0:00:31.880 be with you today, and I hope you'll stay connected 0:00:31.880 --> 0:00:34.720 with us during the week through our daily podcast, our 0:00:34.800 --> 0:00:38.360 YouTube channel, social media, and you can come visit us 0:00:38.400 --> 0:00:40.520 in person. We'd love to have you be a part 0:00:40.560 --> 0:00:42.960 of one of our services. I like to talk with 0:00:43.000 --> 0:00:45.800 something funny, and somebody sent me this funny thought and 0:00:45.960 --> 0:00:47.560 I kind of liked it. But here's how it goes. 0:00:48.200 --> 0:00:52.240 In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then 0:00:52.280 --> 0:00:57.640 God created man and rested. Next God created women. Since then, 0:00:57.920 --> 0:01:02.440 neither God nor man has rested. A lady asked my 0:01:02.480 --> 0:01:05.600 father one time. She said, where would you men be 0:01:05.680 --> 0:01:09.080 without us women? My father smiled and said in the 0:01:09.080 --> 0:01:13.959 Garden of Eden, saying like you mean it. This is 0:01:14.040 --> 0:01:16.960 my Bible. I am what it says I am. I 0:01:17.040 --> 0:01:19.399 have what it says I have. I can do what 0:01:19.520 --> 0:01:22.199 it says I can do. Today I will be taught 0:01:22.280 --> 0:01:26.160 the word of God. I boldly confess. My mind is alert, 0:01:26.520 --> 0:01:29.360 my heart is receptive. I will never be the same. 0:01:29.800 --> 0:01:34.680 In Jesus' name, God bless you. I want to talk 0:01:34.720 --> 0:01:39.400 to you today about not counting on people. Sometimes we're 0:01:39.400 --> 0:01:42.600 getting our worth and value from how people treat us. 0:01:43.120 --> 0:01:47.520 If they're kind and compliment us, invite us to their event, 0:01:48.040 --> 0:01:51.640 acknowledge our gifts, then we'll feel good about ourselves. We 0:01:51.720 --> 0:01:55.880 have their approval, their validation, and it's great when people 0:01:55.960 --> 0:01:59.480 are for us and make us feel valuable. But the 0:01:59.560 --> 0:02:03.880 problem and with counting on people is people can change. 0:02:03.920 --> 0:02:08.040 People can get busy, people can become jealous. People can 0:02:08.080 --> 0:02:11.680 be discouraged. They can't keep you cheered up. They have 0:02:11.760 --> 0:02:16.120 their own issues. They never compliment themselves. They're probably not 0:02:16.160 --> 0:02:19.880 gonna compliment you. And instead of looking to people, you 0:02:19.960 --> 0:02:23.040 have to go to God. No matter how much someone 0:02:23.120 --> 0:02:25.639 loves you and how much they want the best for you, 0:02:26.200 --> 0:02:30.000 they can't give you everything you need. They can't always 0:02:30.040 --> 0:02:32.840 be there to cheer you up and keep you in courage, 0:02:33.040 --> 0:02:37.000 feeling confident. Let them off the hook. That's a lot 0:02:37.040 --> 0:02:39.760 of pressure for someone to know. They have to keep 0:02:39.760 --> 0:02:43.800 you fixed, They have to compliment you three times a day, 0:02:44.120 --> 0:02:46.280 tell you how great you are, how you're gonna make it. 0:02:46.680 --> 0:02:49.560 They want the best for you, but at some point 0:02:49.639 --> 0:02:54.079 they'll let you down. They're human. God never designed us 0:02:54.320 --> 0:02:57.800 to get that all from people but from Him. And 0:02:57.880 --> 0:03:00.720 yes he'll use people, but don't be so prize when 0:03:00.720 --> 0:03:03.560 he pulls that back and you don't get from them 0:03:03.760 --> 0:03:07.200 what you used to. He's teaching you to depend on 0:03:07.400 --> 0:03:12.680 Him and not their approval, their compliments, their encouragement, because 0:03:12.680 --> 0:03:17.040 that's temporary, that's dependent on what's going on in their life. 0:03:17.080 --> 0:03:21.800 And sometimes the acceptance, the approval we're longing for from people, 0:03:22.400 --> 0:03:25.400 they don't have it to give. Nobody gave it to 0:03:25.440 --> 0:03:29.240 them the way you want them to love you, respect you, 0:03:29.360 --> 0:03:33.119 and make you feel important. They never saw that growing up. 0:03:33.360 --> 0:03:36.360 Nobody put that in them. Are you trying to get 0:03:36.440 --> 0:03:40.480 something from someone that they don't have to give? Trying 0:03:40.520 --> 0:03:44.320 to convince that coworker to acknowledge just one time that 0:03:44.400 --> 0:03:48.400 you're talented, that you have good ideas, or that family 0:03:48.440 --> 0:03:52.080 member to accept you, include you, make you feel welcome. 0:03:52.760 --> 0:03:55.280 No matter what you do, it's like your secondary not 0:03:55.440 --> 0:03:59.360 good enough. No, stop counting on people to give you 0:03:59.440 --> 0:04:03.720 something they have. They loved you, sure, they're a good person. 0:04:04.000 --> 0:04:06.360 If they had it, they would give it. Try a 0:04:06.440 --> 0:04:10.720 different approach. God, I know you accept me, you approve me. 0:04:11.240 --> 0:04:13.880 You call me a masterpiece. You said I can do 0:04:13.920 --> 0:04:18.159 all things through Christ. Get your approval from Almighty God. 0:04:19.120 --> 0:04:22.480 Sometimes we're trying to get something from a person that's 0:04:22.560 --> 0:04:25.920 never going to give it. Not because they can't give it, 0:04:26.279 --> 0:04:28.840 but they don't want to. They're never going to be 0:04:28.920 --> 0:04:33.560 for us. Never show us respect, never acknowledge our gifts. 0:04:34.120 --> 0:04:37.600 That's okay. Everyone is not supposed to be for you. 0:04:38.360 --> 0:04:41.120 If you don't realize this, you'll get stuck trying to 0:04:41.200 --> 0:04:44.240 change people's mind, thinking I got to win them over 0:04:44.320 --> 0:04:47.919 and prove that I'm a good person, convince them that 0:04:47.960 --> 0:04:50.560 they're wrong about me. All that's going to do is 0:04:50.600 --> 0:04:54.240 frustrate you, cause you to live stressed. You have to 0:04:54.320 --> 0:04:59.560 let it go and move forward. You don't need their approval. Well, Joe, 0:04:59.600 --> 0:05:03.320 they don't respect me. You don't need their respects. They 0:05:03.360 --> 0:05:07.240 don't acknowledge my gifts. You don't need their acknowledgment. You 0:05:07.240 --> 0:05:11.480 know what they are a distractions. The enemy would love 0:05:11.560 --> 0:05:14.520 for you to waste your time trying to change something 0:05:14.680 --> 0:05:19.200 that you can't change, living stressed over someone that doesn't 0:05:19.240 --> 0:05:24.200 really matter. They cannot stop your destiny. Them not being 0:05:24.320 --> 0:05:29.320 for you doesn't lessen your value. Not recognizing your talent, 0:05:29.960 --> 0:05:34.560 downplaying your accomplishments, treating you like your inferior. That doesn't 0:05:34.640 --> 0:05:37.840 change the fact that you're a masterpiece, that you have 0:05:37.920 --> 0:05:40.839 seeds of greatness, that you're wearing a crown of favor. 0:05:41.800 --> 0:05:45.040 Why are you wasting time trying to get something from 0:05:45.040 --> 0:05:49.560 someone that they're never going to get. Jesus told his disciples, 0:05:49.880 --> 0:05:52.839 when you go into a city and they don't accept 0:05:52.880 --> 0:05:56.960 your message, they don't welcome you. He didn't say, stay 0:05:56.960 --> 0:06:00.320 there and try to convince him to change. Tell them 0:06:00.320 --> 0:06:04.600 how good you are, how sincere prove your talent. No, 0:06:04.760 --> 0:06:07.479 he said, shake the dust off your feet and move on. 0:06:08.320 --> 0:06:12.640 He was saying, don't waste another minute trying to convince 0:06:12.680 --> 0:06:16.719 people to like you, respects you, includes you, come see you. 0:06:17.839 --> 0:06:21.000 We spend too much time trying to win people over 0:06:21.480 --> 0:06:24.159 that are never going to be for us, trying to 0:06:24.200 --> 0:06:27.480 get something that they're never going to give, and this 0:06:27.520 --> 0:06:31.039 can be difficult, especially when it's people close to us. 0:06:31.680 --> 0:06:34.760 We long for approval from our relatives, the people we 0:06:34.839 --> 0:06:38.160 look up to. But think about David in the scripture, 0:06:38.600 --> 0:06:42.920 his father didn't really believe in him. He discounted him 0:06:42.960 --> 0:06:46.160 and left him out in the shepherd's fields. When Samuel 0:06:46.200 --> 0:06:48.960 came to annoint one of the sons as the next king, 0:06:49.720 --> 0:06:53.320 he thought, David, it's not him. He's too small, too young, 0:06:53.600 --> 0:06:57.080 He's not as talented as his brothers. David could have 0:06:57.120 --> 0:07:01.400 lived bitter upset, trying to convince his father to change 0:07:01.400 --> 0:07:04.400 his mind, but he shook it off and move forward. 0:07:05.160 --> 0:07:07.680 When he took lunch to his brothers, they were in 0:07:07.760 --> 0:07:11.160 the army in another city, and he was being kind, 0:07:11.520 --> 0:07:16.120 doing them a favor. The oldest brother, Eliab, belittled him 0:07:16.480 --> 0:07:19.160 in front of the other soldiers. He said, David, what 0:07:19.200 --> 0:07:21.720 are you doing here? And what did you do with 0:07:21.800 --> 0:07:24.440 those few sheep you're supposed to be taken care of. 0:07:25.440 --> 0:07:29.400 He tried to make David feel small and insignificant. You 0:07:29.400 --> 0:07:31.960 would think his brother would say David, thanks for coming 0:07:32.000 --> 0:07:35.880 so far, Thanks for being so kind and generous. But 0:07:36.040 --> 0:07:40.160 people may not give you what you deserve. Sometimes they 0:07:40.160 --> 0:07:43.320 don't have it, it's just not in them. Other Times 0:07:43.320 --> 0:07:47.920 they're jealous, competitive, or they're bitter from things that have 0:07:48.000 --> 0:07:51.280 nothing to do with you. It's easy to try to 0:07:51.320 --> 0:07:56.440 defend and prove and win over because we want people's approval. 0:07:57.080 --> 0:07:59.480 But what if you knew they were never going to 0:07:59.520 --> 0:08:04.040 give it. If you became Superman, you were the greatest, kindest, 0:08:04.080 --> 0:08:09.560 most loving, talented person ever. Yet they're still going to discredit, dismiss, 0:08:09.920 --> 0:08:13.160 downplay who you are. It's much better to do what 0:08:13.280 --> 0:08:17.520 Jesus said, shake the dust off and move on. Be kind, 0:08:17.840 --> 0:08:21.360 be respectful, but don't try to win their approval. You 0:08:21.400 --> 0:08:26.920 don't need it. There are distractions. When that brother disrespected David, 0:08:27.200 --> 0:08:32.000 the scripture says, David turned and walked away. His attitude was, 0:08:32.360 --> 0:08:35.120 I don't need your respects. You don't have to believe 0:08:35.160 --> 0:08:39.400 in me. You don't control my destinies. But had David 0:08:39.440 --> 0:08:42.720 tried to change Iliev's mind and convince him that he 0:08:42.880 --> 0:08:46.160 was good and talented and I'm not what you think, 0:08:47.080 --> 0:08:51.160 he would have been so distracted arguing trying to win 0:08:51.280 --> 0:08:54.480 him over. That he wouldn't have heard Goliath up on 0:08:54.520 --> 0:08:59.079 the mountain. Don't miss your assignment, trying to convince people 0:08:59.120 --> 0:09:01.520 to be for you that are never going to be 0:09:01.520 --> 0:09:06.040 for you, fighting battles that don't matter. Shake the dust 0:09:06.080 --> 0:09:09.360 off and move forward. When my father went to be 0:09:09.400 --> 0:09:12.040 with the Lord and I stepped up to pastor the church, 0:09:12.360 --> 0:09:14.400 there was a man that had been close to our 0:09:14.480 --> 0:09:18.280 family and had been here for many years. He called 0:09:18.320 --> 0:09:21.439 and told me how happy he was for me. Then 0:09:21.480 --> 0:09:23.959 he went on to tell me how to run the church, 0:09:24.600 --> 0:09:27.360 how to lead the staff, and who to hire, and 0:09:27.520 --> 0:09:30.280 what I should speak on and the changes I should make. 0:09:31.200 --> 0:09:35.760 He was very opinionated and very strong. I was very 0:09:35.800 --> 0:09:40.920 insecure and very quiet. Something on the inside rose up 0:09:41.000 --> 0:09:43.920 like a lion. I didn't say anything to him, but 0:09:43.960 --> 0:09:46.680 I thought, you are not going to squeeze me into 0:09:46.720 --> 0:09:49.600 your mold. I may look weak, but you have another 0:09:49.679 --> 0:09:54.400 thing coming. And he was for me as long as 0:09:54.400 --> 0:09:56.920 I was doing what he wanted. He gave me his 0:09:57.000 --> 0:10:00.240 approval as long as I was in his box. The 0:10:00.320 --> 0:10:03.960 problem was I didn't like anything he told me. It 0:10:04.000 --> 0:10:07.360 didn't bear witness to my spirit. I had to decide, 0:10:07.760 --> 0:10:10.120 am I going to do what God's called me to do? 0:10:10.920 --> 0:10:12.880 Or am I going to try to please this man 0:10:13.000 --> 0:10:16.600 and stay in his good grace? And I knew if 0:10:16.679 --> 0:10:19.080 I did what God put in my heart, he'd get upset, 0:10:19.960 --> 0:10:23.280 he'd be offended, he looked down on me. But the 0:10:23.320 --> 0:10:26.240 scripture says it is better to please God than to 0:10:26.280 --> 0:10:29.560 please people. When we come to the end of life, 0:10:30.080 --> 0:10:32.920 We're not going to stand before people. We're gonna stand 0:10:32.920 --> 0:10:36.720 before God. And I didn't take his advice. I went 0:10:36.800 --> 0:10:39.680 the way I felt in my heart, and he was upset. 0:10:40.200 --> 0:10:43.200 But I've learned if you try to keep everyone else happy, 0:10:43.600 --> 0:10:47.760 you're going to be unhappy. To fulfill your assignment. There 0:10:47.800 --> 0:10:53.200 will be people that don't approve, don't accept, misunderstand. You 0:10:53.280 --> 0:10:57.000 can't worry about all that. I knew he was never 0:10:57.080 --> 0:10:59.720 going to give me his approval. He was never going 0:10:59.800 --> 0:11:02.840 to be for me, But that's okay. I didn't need 0:11:02.880 --> 0:11:05.520 his approval. I didn't need him to cheer me on. 0:11:06.640 --> 0:11:08.920 If I had done it his way, Here's what I know, 0:11:09.280 --> 0:11:12.480 it would have never been enough. Take the pressure off. 0:11:12.679 --> 0:11:16.040 You don't need people's applause. Do what God put in 0:11:16.080 --> 0:11:19.560 your heart, and you'll hear his applause, He's the one 0:11:19.600 --> 0:11:24.280 that matters. Promotion doesn't come from people, It comes from God. 0:11:25.040 --> 0:11:27.680 And the funny thing and all credit to God. But 0:11:28.000 --> 0:11:31.560 the church grew and we moved here into the compact center, 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:35.240 and I've had books, media go out all over. He 0:11:35.320 --> 0:11:39.000 never wants acknowledged this, He never wants callback and said, Joel, 0:11:39.080 --> 0:11:41.680 I'm so proud of you. It's amazing what God is. 0:11:42.360 --> 0:11:45.920 My point is he was never really for me. He 0:11:46.040 --> 0:11:50.560 was for manipulating me, controlling me. If you don't do 0:11:50.640 --> 0:11:53.160 what I want, I'm not gonna give you my approval. 0:11:53.640 --> 0:11:57.360 I'm not gonna respect you. Do yourself a favor. Shake 0:11:57.480 --> 0:12:01.560 that dust off and move on. Quit worrying about if 0:12:01.600 --> 0:12:05.000 you're going to fall out of someone's good grace, trying 0:12:05.040 --> 0:12:08.920 to get something that they're never going to give, or 0:12:08.960 --> 0:12:11.320 if they do give, it is going to be conditionals. 0:12:11.720 --> 0:12:14.000 As long as you stay in my box, then I'll 0:12:14.000 --> 0:12:19.120 approve you. You don't need them. There are distractions. If 0:12:19.160 --> 0:12:22.720 you're not aware, you'll waste time and energy trying to 0:12:22.720 --> 0:12:28.520 win them over, letting people manipulate you, being frustrated. Life 0:12:28.600 --> 0:12:30.960 is too short to live that way. You have a 0:12:31.040 --> 0:12:34.640 destiny to fulfill. There was a man in the scripture 0:12:34.760 --> 0:12:38.000 named Hayman. He was a high ranking official in the 0:12:38.040 --> 0:12:42.360 Persian Empire, the right hand man of King Erksees. He 0:12:42.440 --> 0:12:46.760 had this prominent position, working daily with the king, and 0:12:46.840 --> 0:12:49.760 when he walked out of the palace, people would bow 0:12:49.840 --> 0:12:53.640 down to show their respect, that was their tradition. But 0:12:53.679 --> 0:12:57.600 there was a Jewish man named Mordecai that wouldn't bow down. 0:12:58.160 --> 0:13:01.840 He would only vow to Jehovah. Well, everywhere Hayman went, 0:13:02.080 --> 0:13:05.000 people would show their respect, walking down the street or 0:13:05.400 --> 0:13:09.360 going to a restaurant in the city square. People were 0:13:09.400 --> 0:13:14.760 constantly acknowledging Hayman, showing him honor. You would think he 0:13:14.760 --> 0:13:18.480 wouldn't worry about Mordecai, not, given the time of day, 0:13:18.800 --> 0:13:22.319 one person won't buy big deal, hundreds of others do. 0:13:23.360 --> 0:13:27.079 But Verse five says when Hayman saw that Mordecai would 0:13:27.120 --> 0:13:31.079 not kneel down or pay him honor, he was filled 0:13:31.120 --> 0:13:35.880 with rage. He was furious, not because someone tried to 0:13:35.920 --> 0:13:41.040 harm his child, steal his fawns, take his positions, all 0:13:41.080 --> 0:13:45.199 because one man wouldn't show respect. He was so angry, 0:13:45.720 --> 0:13:49.920 so offended. Verse six says he decided it was not 0:13:50.160 --> 0:13:53.600 enough to just get rid of Mordecai alone, but he 0:13:53.720 --> 0:13:57.480 was going to annihilate all the Jewish people. Was so 0:13:57.679 --> 0:14:01.800 consumed trying to get something from Mordecai that Mordecai was 0:14:01.840 --> 0:14:06.240 never going to give that he got distracted, lost his focus. 0:14:06.840 --> 0:14:09.959 Now he's not just upset with Mordecai, he's going to 0:14:10.000 --> 0:14:14.080 try to wipe out tens of thousands of people because 0:14:14.160 --> 0:14:17.920 one man won't show him respect. When you look at 0:14:17.920 --> 0:14:21.320 it from the big picture, it's almost comical. You're going 0:14:21.400 --> 0:14:26.080 to upend your whole life, take these drastic measures because 0:14:26.120 --> 0:14:29.400 one man has offended you. One person want to prove 0:14:29.480 --> 0:14:34.360 you won't celebrate your positions. And the fact is Mordecai 0:14:34.560 --> 0:14:38.560 not bowing down wouldn't have stopped Hayman's destiny. He could 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:41.760 have ignored it, thought I don't need his respect, he 0:14:41.800 --> 0:14:45.200 doesn't control my purpose. But it was a trick to 0:14:45.240 --> 0:14:48.960 get him off course, engaged in a battle that didn't matter, 0:14:49.600 --> 0:14:52.440 trying to get something from someone that they were never 0:14:52.520 --> 0:14:56.200 going to give. How many of us are doing like Hayman, 0:14:57.120 --> 0:15:00.600 so focused on what someone won't give us. Joel, They 0:15:00.640 --> 0:15:03.920 won't to prove me, they don't show me respect. They 0:15:03.960 --> 0:15:07.400 won't compliment me, they don't invite me to their gathering, 0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:11.160 they don't recognize my talent. We can get so set 0:15:11.240 --> 0:15:15.400 on changing them, fixing them, proving to them that we 0:15:15.480 --> 0:15:20.400 get distracted and miss our assignments. You don't need their respect, 0:15:20.960 --> 0:15:23.880 You don't need them to be for you. It may 0:15:23.920 --> 0:15:27.320 be someone close to you, a relative, a coworker that 0:15:27.440 --> 0:15:31.320 should compliment you. They should be grateful and show your respect. 0:15:31.360 --> 0:15:34.920 You deserve it, you have the position, You've been good 0:15:34.960 --> 0:15:38.480 to them. But you can't make people give you something, 0:15:39.080 --> 0:15:43.400 make them like you make them before you. That's a test. 0:15:44.200 --> 0:15:47.440 Are you going to get distracted trying to get something 0:15:47.520 --> 0:15:51.680 that they're never going to give? Live upset, trying to 0:15:51.680 --> 0:15:55.640 pay them back, change their mind? Do like David, turn 0:15:56.200 --> 0:16:00.440 and walk away. Don't pay it any attention. If you 0:16:00.600 --> 0:16:05.560 needed their respect, their validation, their support, you would have it. 0:16:06.200 --> 0:16:09.480 God is not going to withhold any good thing you need. 0:16:10.040 --> 0:16:14.080 If they're withholding it, they can't stand against God. The 0:16:14.160 --> 0:16:17.480 right attitude is I don't need it. Yes I wish 0:16:17.560 --> 0:16:20.560 I had it, but God, I'm not depending on what 0:16:20.680 --> 0:16:23.440 people give or don't give. My trust is in you. 0:16:24.080 --> 0:16:28.600 I get my value my work my encouragement from you. Well, 0:16:28.680 --> 0:16:32.080 Queen Esther was a Jew and she heard a Hayman's 0:16:32.120 --> 0:16:36.360 plan to destroy her people. She asked the king if 0:16:36.400 --> 0:16:39.520 he would have dinner with her and Haman. She was 0:16:39.560 --> 0:16:42.120 going to tell him about this plot. Well, Hayman was 0:16:42.160 --> 0:16:45.440 so happy he is being honored by the king. Verse 0:16:45.480 --> 0:16:49.400 ten says he gathered his friends in his home and 0:16:49.520 --> 0:16:53.560 bragged about his wealth, the honors the king had given him, 0:16:53.600 --> 0:16:56.560 and how he had been promoted over the other leaders. 0:16:57.080 --> 0:17:00.840 How Queen Esther had invited him to a private which 0:17:00.880 --> 0:17:04.760 is her and the king. He was so excited, feeling 0:17:04.800 --> 0:17:08.240 good about himself. Then he said the next verse, but 0:17:08.400 --> 0:17:11.919 all this is meaningless to me as long as I 0:17:11.960 --> 0:17:16.000 see Mordecai sitting there at that palace games. He had 0:17:16.040 --> 0:17:20.280 all these great things going for him, position, influence, friends, honor, 0:17:21.000 --> 0:17:25.120 but one man wouldn't show him respect, one man wouldn't 0:17:25.119 --> 0:17:28.480 give him what he wanted. Instead of letting it go 0:17:28.960 --> 0:17:33.119 shaking the dust off, he stayed focused on it. He thought, 0:17:33.160 --> 0:17:36.840 I gotta fix Mordecai. If it's the last thing I do. 0:17:36.880 --> 0:17:39.280 You know it was the last thing he did. He 0:17:40.119 --> 0:17:44.119 lost his life trying to get something from someone that 0:17:44.160 --> 0:17:47.679 they were never gonna give, and I realized this was 0:17:47.720 --> 0:17:50.800 the plan of God to save the Jews. But look 0:17:50.840 --> 0:17:54.440 at the principles. When you get so focused on trying 0:17:54.440 --> 0:17:57.760 to get something from someone that doesn't want to give it, 0:17:58.480 --> 0:18:01.720 or perhaps they don't have it again, then you'll get 0:18:01.760 --> 0:18:07.480 distracted trying to prove and convince and payback. Do yourself 0:18:07.480 --> 0:18:10.320 a favor. If you don't get it, shake it off 0:18:11.080 --> 0:18:14.359 you don't need it. Quit counting on people to give 0:18:14.359 --> 0:18:17.000 you what only God can give. Go to Him for 0:18:17.119 --> 0:18:21.320 your approval, your validation, your work, because I can promise 0:18:21.359 --> 0:18:25.399 you there will always be someone that doesn't give you 0:18:25.480 --> 0:18:29.440 what you want, what you deserve, what they should. These 0:18:29.480 --> 0:18:35.080 are tests. We can get offended like Haymen, get distracted 0:18:35.119 --> 0:18:38.479 and try to win them over, change their mind, or 0:18:38.520 --> 0:18:42.080 we can do like David and turn and walk away. 0:18:42.400 --> 0:18:44.960 A friend of mine grew up in a single parent 0:18:45.040 --> 0:18:49.000 home and at five years old, his father walked out 0:18:49.000 --> 0:18:51.160 of his life and wouldn't have anything to do with 0:18:51.200 --> 0:18:54.800 the family or him. As a child, he longed to 0:18:54.840 --> 0:18:58.560 see his father and long for the approval, but the 0:18:58.680 --> 0:19:02.920 dad wouldn't return his mother's calls. As a teenager, he 0:19:02.960 --> 0:19:07.440 would send his father's letters, father day cards, birthday cards, 0:19:07.960 --> 0:19:11.880 hoping for some kind of reply, but nothing. The Psalmist said, 0:19:12.400 --> 0:19:16.600 God will be a father to the fatherless. Sometimes people 0:19:16.680 --> 0:19:20.000 don't give us what they should. Children should have love 0:19:20.160 --> 0:19:24.760 and acceptance, approval from their parents, but life can happen. 0:19:25.320 --> 0:19:28.720 People aren't around. They never got it as a child, 0:19:28.760 --> 0:19:31.760 and they don't know how to give it. This young 0:19:31.800 --> 0:19:36.399 men never got offended, didn't grow up bitter and trying 0:19:36.400 --> 0:19:39.840 to prove to people he was okay. His mother was 0:19:40.000 --> 0:19:42.840 always reminding him how he was made in the image 0:19:42.880 --> 0:19:46.560 of God and that he was a masterpiece, approved and 0:19:46.640 --> 0:19:51.440 accepted by his heavenly father. Thirty years old, his father 0:19:51.560 --> 0:19:54.639 reached out and said he wanted to see him. My 0:19:54.720 --> 0:19:57.320 friend took his two little girls, flew to a different 0:19:57.359 --> 0:20:00.600 city and showed up at the house. Life opened the 0:20:00.600 --> 0:20:03.600 door and said, I'm so sorry, but your dad has 0:20:03.680 --> 0:20:06.680 changed his mind. He doesn't want to see you after all. 0:20:07.520 --> 0:20:12.080 You can imagine how heartbreaking discouraging finally got his hopes 0:20:12.160 --> 0:20:15.399 up going to get approval from his father, but it 0:20:15.480 --> 0:20:19.720 never happened. Some people, it's not that they don't want to, 0:20:20.080 --> 0:20:23.239 they just don't have it to give. He learned it 0:20:23.600 --> 0:20:26.320 his father had been abandoned as a child, and there 0:20:26.359 --> 0:20:29.200 were all these wounds and hurts that he had never 0:20:29.280 --> 0:20:33.000 dealt with. The amazing thing is my friend is one 0:20:33.000 --> 0:20:37.199 of the most happy, kind, generous, talented people that you 0:20:37.200 --> 0:20:41.080 will ever meet. His children are now grown and successful. 0:20:41.480 --> 0:20:44.320 You would never know that he didn't have a great upbringing. 0:20:44.760 --> 0:20:47.879 It's because he learned to go to God and not 0:20:48.040 --> 0:20:52.640 to people. Get your value, your work, your approval from 0:20:52.680 --> 0:20:55.919 your heavenly father, because if you're trying to get it 0:20:55.920 --> 0:21:00.000 from people, you can be disappointed. People can let you down. 0:21:00.440 --> 0:21:04.280 People have issues things that they didn't get. It's easy 0:21:04.280 --> 0:21:06.800 to find fault man. Why wasn't I raised in a 0:21:06.800 --> 0:21:11.400 better environment. Why won't my spouse encourage me more? Why 0:21:11.440 --> 0:21:14.880 won't my friend acknowledge my accomplishments. Why don't they give 0:21:14.960 --> 0:21:18.400 me credit? It's almost like they owe me something. I'm 0:21:18.440 --> 0:21:21.359 expecting you to give me. This a better way to 0:21:21.440 --> 0:21:25.679 live is nobody owes me anything. My heavenly Father takes 0:21:25.680 --> 0:21:29.920 care of me. If not, we're depending on people to 0:21:30.000 --> 0:21:33.520 keep us happy, our spouse to cheer us up, our 0:21:33.560 --> 0:21:36.480 friend to make us feel valued. And this coworker needs 0:21:36.520 --> 0:21:39.520 to show me respect, so I feel good about myself. 0:21:40.000 --> 0:21:43.240 Let them off the hook, Quit going to people, and 0:21:43.280 --> 0:21:47.960 start going to God. Two Timothy four The apostle Paul 0:21:48.080 --> 0:21:51.360 was talking about opposition and things that had come against him, 0:21:51.400 --> 0:21:55.240 and he said, in verse ten, Demus has forsaken me 0:21:55.640 --> 0:21:58.679 and gone to another city. Someone he was counting on 0:21:58.760 --> 0:22:03.720 left him fourteen. Alexander, the coppersmith did me great wrong, 0:22:04.200 --> 0:22:07.800 but the Lord will will pay him. Verse sixteen. At 0:22:07.840 --> 0:22:12.359 my trial, no one came to support me. Everyone deserted me, 0:22:12.880 --> 0:22:15.840 But the Lord stood by my side and gave me strengths. 0:22:16.160 --> 0:22:19.200 The Lord will rescue me from every attack. The Lord 0:22:19.240 --> 0:22:22.720 will bring me safely through. Look at all the times 0:22:23.080 --> 0:22:27.080 people let him down, walked away, and weren't loyal. He 0:22:27.119 --> 0:22:30.159 could have been bitter, why did this happen? Trying to 0:22:30.200 --> 0:22:33.440 pay them back, But every time someone did him wrong, 0:22:33.680 --> 0:22:36.320 he said, the Lord will help me. The Lord will 0:22:36.359 --> 0:22:38.880 pay me back. The Lord will rescue me. The Lord 0:22:38.920 --> 0:22:42.439 will bring me safely through. He wasn't depending on people, 0:22:42.800 --> 0:22:46.240 He was depending on God. If he was counting on people, 0:22:46.880 --> 0:22:50.080 he would have been discouraged and given up. Demus left 0:22:50.119 --> 0:22:53.320 him his main man. He'd been good to Demus. He 0:22:53.520 --> 0:22:57.320 mentored him, but he abandoned. Paul went to another city. 0:22:58.119 --> 0:23:00.800 At his trial, no one came to support him. His 0:23:00.840 --> 0:23:05.560 whole staff, friends, followers, people he had been good too. Sorry, Paul, 0:23:05.680 --> 0:23:09.119 you're on your own. There will be these times that 0:23:09.200 --> 0:23:12.640 people can't give you what you need. They're good people, 0:23:13.320 --> 0:23:16.880 but they're busy, they're tired. When you need them, they 0:23:16.920 --> 0:23:20.439 can't make it. Don't get better. Don't try to make 0:23:20.480 --> 0:23:23.360 them feel guilty. Look at all I've done for you. 0:23:24.000 --> 0:23:27.639 If they can't give you what you're looking for, the support, 0:23:28.200 --> 0:23:31.960 the encouragement, the validation. You don't need it from them. 0:23:33.119 --> 0:23:37.199 As you mature, as you grow, God will wean you 0:23:37.359 --> 0:23:40.560 off of what you used to have. Like a mother 0:23:40.720 --> 0:23:43.359 takes away a bottle so the baby can grow and 0:23:43.440 --> 0:23:46.919 eat real food. God will take away what a person 0:23:47.040 --> 0:23:50.119 is giving you so you won't be dependent on them. 0:23:50.840 --> 0:23:53.720 You don't need a crutch, you don't need someone to 0:23:53.800 --> 0:23:57.120 always keep you fixed. Cheer it up, motivate. That's good 0:23:57.160 --> 0:23:59.760 for a season, But you have to learn to get 0:23:59.760 --> 0:24:03.440 that from God and not people. Because one of your 0:24:03.480 --> 0:24:06.159 people may be a demus. You thought I was going 0:24:06.240 --> 0:24:10.280 to say a demon a demus. Maybe that too, Demus 0:24:10.359 --> 0:24:13.399 left you when you really needed him, or a Peter. 0:24:14.320 --> 0:24:17.160 He said, Jesus, I'll always be with you. You can 0:24:17.240 --> 0:24:20.840 count on me. But when the soldier showed up, he 0:24:20.880 --> 0:24:24.600 denied that he knew Jesus or a king. Saul he 0:24:24.720 --> 0:24:27.680 invited David to the palace. He was all for him 0:24:28.320 --> 0:24:32.680 until David started getting more attention, more favored. He killed 0:24:32.680 --> 0:24:37.040 a giant. Now Saul was throwing spears, jealous, trying to 0:24:37.080 --> 0:24:40.520 take David out. That's why you can't count on people. 0:24:40.800 --> 0:24:44.240 They can change. It's great when they give you the support, 0:24:44.760 --> 0:24:47.679 the love, the compliments. Sure, God will have people that 0:24:47.760 --> 0:24:51.439 are there for you like that, loyal, kind, amazing, but 0:24:51.640 --> 0:24:56.680 sometimes God pulls them back. You have to recognize what's happening. 0:24:56.960 --> 0:25:00.439 You're growing up. God's getting you prepared to go to 0:25:00.520 --> 0:25:04.320 new levels. Where you're going. You can't depend on people. 0:25:04.560 --> 0:25:09.000 It's between you and God. Second Samuel, David told his 0:25:09.080 --> 0:25:12.200 staff that he wanted to take a census and see 0:25:12.200 --> 0:25:16.280 how many people they had, but God told David specifically 0:25:16.800 --> 0:25:19.960 to not count the people. One of the commanders said, David, 0:25:20.040 --> 0:25:23.240 we can't take a census, you know, God instructed us 0:25:23.240 --> 0:25:26.720 not to do it. David insisted they ended up doing it. 0:25:27.160 --> 0:25:30.280 But it's interesting that God didn't want them to count. 0:25:30.920 --> 0:25:33.520 God counted the people when he fed the five thousand, 0:25:33.920 --> 0:25:36.600 five loaves and two fish. He had them sit in 0:25:36.640 --> 0:25:40.360 groups of fifty. God counted Gideon's men, said you've got 0:25:40.359 --> 0:25:43.320 too many. The scripture says God counts the number of 0:25:43.359 --> 0:25:46.840 hair on our head. It wasn't so much that God 0:25:46.880 --> 0:25:50.000 didn't want David to count the people. He didn't want 0:25:50.080 --> 0:25:53.680 David to count on the people. He didn't want him 0:25:53.680 --> 0:25:56.879 to rely on the numbers and on Do they like me? 0:25:57.400 --> 0:26:01.040 Do they respect me? Are they for me? Don't count 0:26:01.080 --> 0:26:04.600 on that, because sooner or later a demus will share well, 0:26:05.240 --> 0:26:08.639 a saul a Mordecai that won't give you what you want. 0:26:09.040 --> 0:26:12.159 If you're counting on people, you'll get distracted trying to 0:26:12.200 --> 0:26:15.280 win them over it, discourage because they won't do what 0:26:15.359 --> 0:26:18.680 you want. Are you trying to get something from someone 0:26:18.960 --> 0:26:23.320 that's never going to give it? Like Haymen, frustrating yourself 0:26:23.920 --> 0:26:26.520 trying to convince this person to like you, respect you, 0:26:26.600 --> 0:26:31.240 approve you. Take the pressure off. You don't need their approval. 0:26:31.560 --> 0:26:34.439 Don't lose your focus trying to get from them what 0:26:34.600 --> 0:26:37.480 God can give They don't have to be for you. 0:26:38.080 --> 0:26:42.359 Their disrespect will not keep you from slaying giants, from 0:26:42.400 --> 0:26:46.879 taking thrones, from setting new standards. They don't control your destiny. 0:26:47.400 --> 0:26:50.639 Quit counting on the people and go to God. If 0:26:50.680 --> 0:26:53.719 you'll do this, I believe and declare, God is going 0:26:53.800 --> 0:26:57.800 to strengthen you. Favor you, fight your battles. You will 0:26:57.920 --> 0:27:02.400 rise higher, accompass dream and become all you were created 0:27:02.440 --> 0:27:06.240 to be. In Jesus's name, And if you receive it, 0:27:06.520 --> 0:27:10.520 can you say amen? I'd like to give you an 0:27:10.520 --> 0:27:13.920 opportunity to make Jesus the lord of your life. What'd 0:27:13.960 --> 0:27:17.800 you pray with me? Just say, Lord, Jesus, I repent 0:27:17.840 --> 0:27:21.480 of my sins, Come into my heart. I make you 0:27:21.600 --> 0:27:25.000 my Lord and savior. If you've prayed that simple prayer, 0:27:25.119 --> 0:27:28.040 we believe you got born again. We'd love to send 0:27:28.080 --> 0:27:30.679 you some free information on your new walk with the Lord. 0:27:31.040 --> 0:27:33.239 You can text the number on the screen or go 0:27:33.280 --> 0:27:35.679 to the website. But I hope you'll get into a 0:27:35.720 --> 0:27:42.080 good Bible based church and keep God first place. Sometimes 0:27:42.119 --> 0:27:45.800 in life, people don't choose us. We've all felt overlooked 0:27:45.840 --> 0:27:48.520 and like we're not good enough. It's easy to live 0:27:48.600 --> 0:27:51.919 inferior think you. We don't measure up. People may have 0:27:52.000 --> 0:27:55.360 left you out. The good news is God has chosen you. 0:27:55.640 --> 0:27:58.800 He's the one that matters. And in my new book Chosen, 0:27:59.240 --> 0:28:03.040 your life is mark for distinction, you'll discover before you 0:28:03.119 --> 0:28:06.120 were born, God not only knew you, but he hand 0:28:06.240 --> 0:28:09.480 picked you and placed a calling on your lie. You 0:28:09.520 --> 0:28:13.520 are equipped and empowered to fulfill your destiny. When you 0:28:13.640 --> 0:28:17.560 understand that you're chosen, fear and doubt can't stay. You 0:28:17.720 --> 0:28:20.600 live with a boldness to step into the greatness God 0:28:20.640 --> 0:28:22.720 put in you. I love to send you by new 0:28:22.720 --> 0:28:26.320 book Chosen, plus the Chosen T Shirt from our friends 0:28:26.400 --> 0:28:27.159 at Copperfit. 0:28:27.920 --> 0:28:30.359 As our way of saying thank you for your gift 0:28:30.400 --> 0:28:33.000 of any amount this month, we would like to send 0:28:33.040 --> 0:28:36.879 you a copy of Joel's book Chosen. Your life is 0:28:37.000 --> 0:28:41.280 Marked for Distinction. In the scriptures, Jesus encouraged us by 0:28:41.320 --> 0:28:46.080 saying you didn't choose me, I chose you. This powerful 0:28:46.120 --> 0:28:49.280 guide will help you discover the abundant life you were 0:28:49.320 --> 0:28:52.720 designed to live as a child of God. You have 0:28:52.800 --> 0:28:56.840 a calling, a purpose, a destiny still to be fulfilled. 0:28:57.160 --> 0:28:59.880 When you request your copy, we also want to send 0:28:59.920 --> 0:29:03.720 you are exclusive Chosen T shirt from Copperfit that will 0:29:03.720 --> 0:29:07.760 remind you that you've been chosen by Almighty God every 0:29:07.840 --> 0:29:11.520 time you wear it. Please request these gifts today and 0:29:11.600 --> 0:29:15.240 discover that God is moving on your behalf. Your next 0:29:15.320 --> 0:29:17.840 days are going to be your best days. 0:29:18.400 --> 0:29:21.600 You're not average, You're not ordinary. You've been chosen by 0:29:21.680 --> 0:29:24.560 Almighty God. Betoy and I want you to know how 0:29:24.600 --> 0:29:27.040 much we love you. We pray for you and your 0:29:27.080 --> 0:29:30.280 family every day, and thanks so much for your prayer 0:29:30.440 --> 0:29:34.320 and support. Your generosity is helping people all over the world. 0:29:34.800 --> 0:29:37.480 A special thank you to our Champion of Hope partners 0:29:37.600 --> 0:29:40.320 for your monthly gifts. If you're not a partner, I 0:29:40.320 --> 0:29:43.760 hope you'll consider becoming one. Remember you can watch the 0:29:43.840 --> 0:29:49.000 services online live every Sunday morning, download our daily podcast, 0:29:49.320 --> 0:29:53.560 watch on YouTube the new Joelosting Network social media, listen 0:29:53.600 --> 0:29:57.920 on Serious ExM. We'll keep you encouraged and inspired until 0:29:57.920 --> 0:30:00.160 we see you next time. Made the Lord bless you 0:30:00.160 --> 0:30:01.000 you and keep you. 0:30:02.040 --> 0:30:05.479 Be sure to request your copy of Chosen Your Life 0:30:05.520 --> 0:30:09.320 is marked for distinction, plus our exclusive Chosen T shirt 0:30:09.360 --> 0:30:13.840 from Copperfit. Visit Joelostein dot com or call eight eight 0:30:13.880 --> 0:30:18.440 eight five sixty seven. Joel for an additional donation. This month, 0:30:18.560 --> 0:30:22.080 we are also offering the NLT Large Print Thin Line 0:30:22.160 --> 0:30:26.240 Reference Bible. This Bible also enables you to connect through 0:30:26.240 --> 0:30:29.920 your smartphone or tablet to a vast powerpack array of 0:30:30.000 --> 0:30:35.480 study notes, devotionals, interactive maps, videos, and worship music. You 0:30:35.560 --> 0:30:39.480 can request these inspiring resources by calling eight eight eight 0:30:39.760 --> 0:30:43.920 five six seven Joel or logging on to jolostein dot 0:30:43.920 --> 0:30:49.200 com today call or click anytime, twenty four hours a day. Yes, 0:30:49.600 --> 0:30:53.000 God has chosen you for a reason, for a purpose. 0:30:53.480 --> 0:30:55.160 Request your copies today