Stephanie Ike Okafor - Who Is A Godly Wife Before I Do

Welcome back guys too. Before I do a biblical blueprint on love and marriage. This is part five of the series and today we're going to be talking about who is a godly wife? Now? If you if this is your first time tuning into this series, I encourage you to watch to go back after this and really start from the beginning. So far, we have discussed what is marriage, the purpose of marriage, understanding love in marriage, who is a godly husband? And here we are talking about who is a godly wife? Now, first of all, that we did this when we talked about who's a godly husband. Let's define who is a wife before we get to a godly wife? Right. A wife is a woman who enters into a legally or culturally recognized union with a man out of mutual love, commitment, and a desire to build a life together. Why. I also talk about culture culturally recognized that I've seen messages where people have mentioned like, hey, based on the culture there from I didn't have like a wedding in a church or this, does that still count as a marriage? Listen, if there's families involved, the families are aware of it. I'm Nigerian and the marriage that is recognized as marriage to our parents and our families. It's not what happens in the church. It's not what happens when you wear a big white dress. We have traditional marriages, and it's more so about the families acknowledging that, hey, this is your wife, this is your husband, and that's it. You know, they pay a bride prece and things like that. So this is who a wife is now. Ephesians five twenty five says, husbands, love your wife just as Christ also loved the church, and he gave himself for her. It doesn't say love your submissive wife. It doesn't say love your god fearing wife. It doesn't say any of that. It says love your wife. God respects order. Right, her inability to be submissive does not make her less your wife. She is your wife. Right. If you're married, and as we go into the roles of a biblical wife, and if you recognize, like man, I don't think my wife is any of these things, it's not for you to treat her in a way that is that could feel like emotionally abusive. Right. It's not for you to speak down on her. It's for you to embody a godly husband. Be patient, be kind, and pour into her. Right. You can have her watch this series with you or other resources that will help her to grow in the understanding of who a godly wife is. But regardless, she is your wife. Let's talk about five rows of a biblical wife. Number one, she is submissive first Peter three, from verse one to six, it says this, wives likewise, this is a powerful scripture. I really want you to, like even write this down for wives, for women who are looking to be wives, write this down, wives likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they without a word, may be worn by the conduct of their wives when they observe your chaste, conduct accompanied by fear. And this is like the fear of the Lord. Right. Do not let your adornment be merely outward arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on final apparel. Rather, let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, whose daughters you are? And if you do good and are not afraid with any terror. There is so much to unpack in this scripture. Now, first of all, you have to understand this. A godly wife isn't submissive as a response to her husband's godly behavior. She isn't submissive because he's a godly husband. It is the order of God for the home. It is God's command. She is submissive because she is the wife. Submission is not a reward that she gives her husband for good behavior. Submission is the posture that God called the woman to be in the home. You have to understand this. Submission is not because God sees you as inferior or less significant. Right. When Jesus walked the earth, he was submitted to the will of the Father, but Jesus is equally God. Right. It has to do with order. Don't buy into the hype that God is not for women and all these things. God loves women. But where there is order, it shows obedience. When you think about you know, even if a country lacks order, there's chaos, there's no law. It just causes people to just you know, move out just careless behavior, but whether it's order, order reveals obedience. So when God puts order in a home a woman. A woman's level of submission to God. A married woman is also measured by how she submits to her husband. You cannot say, man, I just I love God. You know God, I would lay my life down for you, X, Y, and Z. But you can't submit to your husband. This is the deception of the times because you're saying, God, I will submit to you. But what does the Bible say, submit to your husband as unto the Lord. Now it's easier. We believe it's easier to submit to God because it's like, is God, listen like God? We have this idea that you know, submission to God looks like only what is directly between God and I. When you know God tells me, hey, turn left, I'll turn left. Let me do this, I'll do that. But submission to a man, no. The moment you're uncomfortable, you say, you know, here's a the best not even the best thing, the funniest thing. And it's so common that women begin to say, you know, I just think God. God is not in this marriage because the man said something that you are like, no, this is not connected to who I am. I'm not comfortable with this. I don't want to make this decision. And you're like, ah, I don't think God is in this marriage. The man may stray from the path of you know, being a godly man, or sometimes a woman will enter a marriage and realize, wait, this is not the man I thought he was. And then you begin to say, I don't think God is in this. I think God is telling me to get out of this. But look at what the scripture says. Let's go back. It says, you know, be submissive to young husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, that you may be married to a man who is an unbeliever or is just not godly, that without a word, they will be won by the conduct of their wife. You see the enemy. Here's the interesting thing. When a woman feels as though her husband is not a good leader, the voice and if you don't know the word of God, the voice of the enemy comes in and says, leave your husband. But if you know the word of God, you would hear the voice of the Holy Spirit say change your behavior. It depends on where you're anchored. If you're not anchored in the knowledge of God's of God's voice and his ways. What you would hear is leave your husband, and you will call that voice the voice of God. But you see God and his word, they're one. If you know his voice, you would hear change your behavior because could it be that God wants to use your conduct to draw him closer to himself. See another thing I love about submission is because there is it shows order, and whether it's order, there is obedience. And your submission to your husband actually reveals how submitted you are to God. And your submission to your husband invites the hand of God into your marriage, and you begin to see God fighting for you. You see, if you're with a man, and this is important whether you're married or 're not married, because whether he is godly or ungodly, men are still human. You will encounter them when they're just in their humanity. It's not everything they do that would feel incredible and excellent. Right, But when you are submitted to God in the way that you are submitted to your husband, you see the hand of God. You see, sometimes a man cannot even hear what God wants to tell him because your voice is constantly in his head. You just constantly nagnack, not here, but there is something. Look at what the scripture says in verse four, right, when it talks about the beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. It's not everything you respond to as a woman. That's part of submission. It's not everything you have to nag about, a complain about. Sometimes your silence becomes the microphone for the Holy Spirit. Sometimes your quiet posture becomes the microphone for the Holy Spirit in his life. It's not everything you have to respond to, right, And so when you make room for God in that way, God begins to work on the heart of the man. Right. Submission is not, you know, solely based on just like I said, right, it's not solely based on you. You trust the wisdom of your husband, right, I trust him one hundred percent. You have to understand this because today we make excuses for why we can't submit. It's not about the wisdom of your husband. Is that you trust God. Look at how it referenced Sarah. Do you know that? In and write the scripture down In Genesis twelve, and this is from verse ten to twenty, Sarah was with Abraham and they get into a town Abraham tells his wife, and this was for him, this was wisdom, right, this was a strategy. Abraham tells his wife that if they ask you who you are, tell them you are my sister. He was not lying. They were half you know, she was his half sister. I mean they did those things in that time. But she tells him, you know, tell them that you are my sister so that they don't kill me. Then when the king of the land sees Sarah and he's like, wow, she is beautiful, she is this she He takes Sarah with every intention to sleep with her, and I would even go to say rape her, because I don't think Sarah would be willing to sleep with the king. But he's like, oh, this is your sister. Cool. You know he had an intention to sleep with her, and that was why God intervened. So the king, the king is looking at her like, okay, this is someone. He had all intentions to sleep with her. And you would know that when you study the verses, right. But it's so interesting that the Bible never says that in the midst of all that chaos, in the midst of Sarah being you know, realizing that he they've taken me away from my husband, knowing the culture of the land, knowing what the king intends to do with her. She never said, hey, just kidding, Okay, I'm a married woman. She and this is a very hard thing to see. It's it's very hard to swallow this, this whole situation. She stayed quiet because she was still submitted under the wisdom of her husband. Say you are my sister. And in that gentle and quiet spirit, God intervened. That's why when the Bible uses when it talks about submission, it says, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, even calling him Lord. You see the same way that we call Jesus lord that she called her husband lord. What is Lord a master? Look, I am submitted to your leadership, your direction. In the face of seeing Abraham this plan has backfired. Okay, yes, your life was spared, but now mine is about to be defiled. She stayed quiet. I'm not gonna lie to you. That was a hard one for me to just read. Okay, she stayed quiet. But in that quiet posture, what happens got steps in. God gives the king a dream that warns him concerning Abraham and to return Sarah, and not only does the King do this. He even gave them riches. So out of what seemed to lack wisdom, out of what seemed to be a foolish instruction and direction, because Sarah took the posture of submission, God turned it around to be a blessing. Look, I have seen this even in my own life. I have been very independent, you know, before getting married, and when I got married, there would be things that my husband will say, hey, let's do it this way, and I just would not agree. I'm like, no, this does not make sense. But before being married, there were many things that God was teaching me about marriage. So even though I'm like, you know, you know, in my head it doesn't make sense, but in my spirit, I'm like, Okay, I'm going to submit to his leadership. I'll give you a I had them example. Let me not even go deep. Let me tell you something so random. We were in Dallas and I had to minister and I was also going to see my cousins because my aunt was in the hospital at the time. I needed to do my hair. This is random. Needed to get my hair done. I had a ponytail. I needed to, you know, redo my ponytail. So I called two beauty salons. One was about fifteen minutes the other one was about thirty to forty minutes out. The one that was about fifteen minutes away, she specifically tells me, I don't do ponytails. Find another salon, right. I'm like, okay, thank you. I called the other one. They say, oh, yeah, we do ponytails. You know you can come in, you can come in right now. Blah blah blah blah blahah. Like great, now that one is forty five minutes you know, thirty to forty minutes rather, and I still have to go see my aunt. Like there was so much happening. And my husband says, go to the one that's fifteen minutes. And I'm like, babe, I know I'm not tripping. They clearly said they don't do ponytails, he said, Babe, go to the one that's fifteen minutes. Somebody there must know how to do a ponytail. It's a ponytail. I'm like, babe, I know you think you know these things, but I'm a woman. Okay. If they say they don't do ponytails, they don't do ponytails. He says, Babe, he didn't change his pasture. He says, Babe, fifteen minutes, you go there, you get your hair done, you're fifteen minutes, you're back, and you can you can you have time to handle all the things you need to do in the day, rather than you feeling like you're rushing because you don't know what traffic could be like, he says, go to the one that's fifteen minutes. And I said, Lord, I am going to submit to this, and in my mind I'm just waiting for it to not work so I could tell him. I told you, I'm a woman, I know these things, right. I was just waiting. I said, Now I'm gonna waste even more time. I get there. I go to the fifteen minutes one. I meet the lady and I'm like, hey, I'm the one that called asking for a ponytail. I'm like, in my head, I'm just if I could roll my eyes, like to my brain, I was doing that. Okay. I'm like, well, Mark, this is not gonna work. And then she says, honestly, I do ponytails. I just don't like letting people know. I said what she says, Yeah, I do ponytails. It was the best ponytail I've ever done. When she was done with my hair, and I like, I was just like, what, Like, how do I what do I do with this? This? And so I'm texting my husband. I'm like, yeah, I'm getting my hair done. He sends me like a smiley face, and in my mind I wanted him to be wrong. So but what happened in submission right the Lord said I'm gonna work it out when a woman, there were so many things I wanted to say to him. I said, I'm gonna be quiet, because when he kept saying go, in my head, I'm like hmmm, and I could hear the Holy spirits say be quiet and go, and I'm like okay. And so I was thinking God would give me permission to say all the things when it doesn't work, so I could be like, you see, I told you. But in choosing to be gentle and quiet, it became a microphone for God to intervene. And he steps in something as simple as hair, and it says, from as simple as hair to very complex things. I have seen the hand of God through every situation. I will see that when I choose to submit, even when I don't understand, even when I don't agree, it ends up working better than what I thought would make sense. Right. Submission. It's not just because you're like, oh, I trust my husband one hundred percent. There are days you're gonna be like, Babe, I don't know about this. It looks like it's about to backfire. But you submit why you trust God, and you trust that God as I'm submitted to him. Because of my submission to you and what I cannot reach, what I cannot talk for I cannot handle. You would handle it for me. That has to be your posture as a wife. Right. And then look at what it says. It talks about this incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. We talked about in the series the highest beauty of a woman in her home, in her marriage home. It's not her out of beauty. Submission is beauty before a man. Her submission is the highest form of beauty in marriage. Because you know what it says to the man, whether you do or you don't, it says, I trust you because I trust God, so I can trust your leadership. I can trust how you're gonna go this home. I respect you, and sometimes you know in your posture you can draw them even closer to who God has called them to be, because when they see you, they're like man. The way she carries herself, and she does this because of her faith, it will cause the Holy Spirit to work on their heart even more. Right, and so don't only pursue out of beauty. Now, the Bible was not against the woman you know being beautiful. It talks about in verse three, do not let your adornment be merely outward. So there's nothing wrong with your outward beauty, getting your hair done, wearing gold, all these things, there's nothing wrong with that. But understand what weighs more. The beauty that is incorruptible is that gentle and quiet spirit. You see. Proverbs to twenty one to nine says it is better to live on the corner of a roof then share a house with a nagon wife. Don't be a nagon wife. Don't do that. It will drive the man crazy. Right, it will be just your voice, your voice, your voice, your voice. It doesn't make room for God. And when the Bible says it's better to be a corner of a roof, it's actually talking to an exposed roof exposed to harsh weather, that the man will find more peace being exposed to harsh weather than being with you. Don't do that doesn't mean the man has to be perfect, but God is also working in him. Right Number two, A godly wife is a friend Titus too fourth says, these older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and to love their children. Now we discuss and we unpack this when we talked about understanding love and marriage, because the root word for love your husband speaks of friendship. It speaks of friendship. And there was a wisdom that when it comes to keeping your home, that the older women were to teach the younger women how to be friends with their spouses. Right, And we talked about three key characteristics of a healthy friendship. Emotional support. Yes, your man may seem all tough and all these things, but he needs your emotional support. He needs to know that you are a safe space, a safe space for him to lay his head. Right. Trust and loyalty. A man should feel like you trust him in some capacity. He should know that. Men, oh, she trusts me. She trusts me, you know, she trusts my decision making. And it's not that you guys can talk things through. Just think about how you are with your friends, right, there should be some level of trust and loyalty and also shared interest and activities. Now, what does this also say for single women? If you're dating someone that you don't you know, you're just like, I don't, Yeah, I can't. I can't trust you. I don't trust you to lead me. Da da da da da da da da. And you're also not willing to embody what it means to be a godly wife. Wait. Look, pay attention to these red flags. Okay, work it out while dating before you enter the marriage. Okay. And so the third thing is a godly wife is a wise builder. Now, Proverbs fourteen one, it says the wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands. When we talk about wisdom, we're talking about the application of knowledge. So before we talk, we just say a wise woman this is a woman who has first of all, gained knowledge, right, because the knowledge gives her the ability to discern the right thing to do at the right time. So she's gained knowledge about what it means to be a godly wife. And because of the knowledge she has gained, it doesn't just stop that knowledge, because sometimes some people are just they accumulate knowledge over and over and over again, and they do nothing with it. She's gained knowledge and she applies it. If you're watching this, don't just watch this as just information just to be informed. You watch it with a willingness to change, right, because that is what causes you to apply knowledge. For example, when you think about it's so fascinating how many books and programs and diets exists for people who want to lose weight. And I'm saying this because I have been the buyer for many of these things. And why do we keep buying them over and over again. It's the same information package in a new way. Why because we're using lack of We're like, okay, if I just gain more knowledge than I would do the thing. No, the problem is you don't want to change the problem is I really don't want to stop eating that cookie. Okay, I don't know if I want to wake up and work out right now. And so to kind of just buy time, I buy a new book, I buy a new program, and then I'm like, oh, it didn't work out. Let me look for something else. It's the same information, repackage and repurpose with a new name. So change happens when, first of all, there is a willingness that you realize there are things I need to unlearn. You see yourself through the vision that you have. It's not just about it's not just words. There are actions that will back it up. This is where wisdom comes in. The woman has knowledge and she's able to apply that knowledge. Right. That is where they says, a wise woman builds her house. She recognizes that there is a time to speak and there's a time to be still. She recognizes that, you know what, right now, let me allow my husband to do X, Y and Z, and next time we'll talk about this. She knows how to navigate her house with wisdom. She has learnt her husband, and she has learned the word about who she's called to be. And so it's not every fight that she engages in. It's not everything, she says, it's not everything she picks apart. Right, she has wisdom and she applies that wisdom, and it builds and sustains her home. Then on the other side, it says, but the foolish pulls it down with their hands. Foolishness is ignorance on display. There is an ignorance of who you're called to be in the home. And so because here's the thing, knowledge is powerful when you have a willingness for that information to change you. Knowledge becomes almost not even so much a boundary, but knowledge gives you direction on how to respond. Where there is no knowledge, then you become impulsive because you respond solely based on your emotions. Knowledge helps you navigate your emotions that I know I'm upset right now, but there is there is something I know that tells me be still. Don't say what you want to say concerning this situation is going to cost more harm than good. It's just like if you're arguing with a friend and a friend does something to you and you want to say something, You're like, you know what, let me just get off the phone because if I say this, it will cause more damage to our friendship than good. To let me just be quiet. So, where a woman lacks knowledge concerning her home, concern, her posture as a wife, then her emotions become what directs her actions. So the moment she just have you ever seen men experience this where the thought and you have to understand thoughts are spiritual things. When the enemy wants to attack anything in your life, he first goes to the mind. So when the enemy wants to attack your marriage, he penetrates your thought life. And if you don't have the Word of God that can direct you to realize and discern, because where there is wisdom, that is a woman who has discernment. If you don't have the ability to discern what is of God and what is of the enemy, then you will just take a random thought and argue with your husband about something. He has no clue what you're saying. And a woman who moves in ignorance does not think of the consequences of her actions, and when the home begins to fall apart, you blame everyone except how you contributed to the situation. So a wise woman, you see, marriage is intentional to thrive in. Marriage is intentional. And this is very important especially if you never if you were never exposed to a healthy marriage, you want to know what the Word of God says concerning marriage, because if you were exposed to a healthy marriage, that marriage almost became it imparted the Word in you. If you saw your parents have a healthy marriage, then even without reading and having knowledge of the word, it had there was an impartation that took place in you to see what allowed their marriage to thrive. Right, Still learn and be a student, right, but there is an advantage there. When you don't have the advantage, you have to know what the word of God says, because if not, your default is to respond according to your exposure. That would be your default. So your default. I'm saying this for myself too. I grew up in a single parent home, and I just I told you previously in the series, I was a very independent person. If I did not have the Word of God to be a guard over my responses, I don't even know if I would have entered the marriage stage the way I would have treated my husband while we were dating. Because he's a no nonsense person. He'll be like, yeah, bro, this nah, this ain't gonna work. So something has to kind of like reel you in. Right, if you did not experience, if you didn't have any exposure experience to a healthy marriage, know what the Word of God says, and not just knowing what the word of God says, have a willingness to change, to be transformed by that word, because that would save and build your home. If you are careless with your words, careless with your actions, it will have consequences, and you will have to take ownership of the part you played. Right. So a godly woman is a wise builder. Number four, she is a loyal partner. We talked about this too with godly men, because this is both ways right Hebrews thirteen four. Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually a moral and adultrust Right, you we said, you know said this last week. You cannot honor your marriage while making excuses for dishonorable behavior as a woman. Pay attention to what your husband is not comfortable with, right, Pay attention to their people that your husband is like, you know, I'm not really comfortable with you being friends with this guy or x Y. It's not about him trying to control you or anything like that. Or you can't pick my friends for me or da da da da da da dad. There's something he sees that you may not see, right, and you should be loyal to you know, protecting your marriage to the point that maybe even through that then you know he can see the situation better. But if you're willing to let your marriage fail to be in close proximity with someone that he's not comfortable with. And sometimes you know, as women, we're very biased. We would be upset if a man tells us that, but we expect him to listen if we tell him, hey, I'm not comfortable with you being around that girl. Right, So pay attention to what your husband says. Talk, don't be guarded, don't be defensive, find out. Say, babe, can you explain to me what is it about this guy? You know, talk it through. But there should be enough respect in the marriage that you should care for how you're husband because you see, you are responsible for how your spouse feels. Right, you should care enough for how your spouse feels to honor that, Hey, maybe there's something he sees I'm not seeing and for a season, you know, maybe there are adjustments that needs to happen. That's perfectly okay, that's not weird. That's not controlling or manipulative or any of those things. And that is also why we talked about this in an earlier part of the series. It's healthy for when you are married to also have a community of married people. Right. It doesn't mean it doesn't take you away from friends who are single. You were one single, right, I was one single and it doesn't take you away from that. But what it does is that it gives you a community that shows you that some things are not crazy. It's actually normal, okay. But number five, A godly woman, a godly wife is a helper genesis to a And the Lord God said, it is not good that man should be alone. I will make him a helper comparable to him. Now, you see, marriage is a place of service. You serve one another being. You know, you should be a helper, right, not a hater. And what I mean by that is sometimes you know your spouse might First of all, a man carries the weight of the family, right. He may not be the you know, the highest earning of the family or something like that, but mentally he's carrying the weight of the family. So he's always looking for innovative ways to build his home, whether it's financially or otherwise. So there are times where you know your husband might want to make some investments, or you know, he wants to put money into something that you may not necessarily agree with, whither it's based on you don't think is the right investment or selfishness. You're like, babe, we should use this money for something else. Right, there are some instances where you have to learn to be a helper right, support his vision, Support what he's doing if it's not, you know, breaking the home or breaking the bank. Right, support him, understand, get to get you know, ask him questions to find out babe, Okay, why do you see this way? Why would you like to do this? Get involved right, don't just give an opinion without information. Ask him questions concerning what he's doing. How does he see this bringing more income or X, Y and z. And be a supportive wife, be a helper because he has he's serving you. You also are serving him, and you both and what you both are serving with each other. It's what God has called to both of you, not just you guys as individuals, because what he's bringing is for the family. What you're bringing is for the family. Even though women will say my money is for me, but it's for the family. That's why even when God created Adam and Eve, he talked to how that they should have dominion, right, they should have to let them have dominion. So God is calling things to both of you. But the person who may be the visionary couldn't. It's not like God gives you both the same vision. There are things that you would carry their things ideas you would have. You would want him to be a helper to you. You want him to support you and to be there for you. And so women, and I'm saying this particularly for the women, because sometimes women can tend to be more selfish when it comes to where things should go, where money should go, what should happen here, what should take place here? We tend to think more of ourselves while the husband is carrying the weight of like the family. Okay, so be a helper or support him. Don't be a negative spouse because a negative spouse is a significant threat to his vision. If a spouse is negative, it affects his self esteem, his motivation, and his sense of purpose. If every idea he brings up you shut it down. It's not just about the idea. You're shutting him down. Okay, So use wisdom in the conversations. There's some things you guys are going to talk through, and he would also see that, Hey, maybe this doesn't work for now, this is not making sense or X, Y and Z. But be understanding, be supportive, and be a good helper. At the end of the day you both are going to enjoy the harvest. Now, what I want to say to encourage all women, being a godly wife is not something that happens overnight. It's not something that you have to check off all these boxes before you get married. It's about a willingness to become if you are willing, it's a journey. I am still walking these things out right. It's a journey, but it's a mark. What marks you is that you have a willingness to walk it out. There are things that have to be unlearned. There are things that have to be uprooted that it took years of your life, that it was planted and nourished for years of your life, that the Lord is like, hey, we have to uproud this in order for you to be healthy. That's not a problem, right, That should not hold you back from marriage. But you should be willing to unlearn and willing to learn. You should be willing to embody who a godly wife is and your husband being patient with you on that journey. You might have some moments, but it's about it's marked by a willingness to say, God, I want to be who you've called a wife to be in a home and then you work it out. It's not doesn't just happen overnight. It's a journey, and you can walk out that journey with your spouse. Okay, and for men, if you're married, like I said in the beginning, and your wife maybe does not embody these qualities, it is a journey. Encourage her, walk things out with her. Love her. You don't love her because she's godly, You love her because she's your wife. And love this is this is the beauty of God who God called us to be in in marriage causes a response. Love. The purity of love and the boldness of love causes a response. The reason we give our life to Jesus is because we're responding to love. We're responding to what kind of love is this? That God so loved the world that he gave. That's what the Bible says. The Bible doesn't tell us talk about Jesus coming out of You know, God wanted the world to be better, so he said Jesus, no, no, no. It says God so loved the world that he gave. And when you have a revelation of Jesus, what you have is a revelation of his love. And we respond to that love and we say, God, here I am, I surrender. So check this out. The response to love is submission. And then for the man, the response to a woman who submits is to draw closer to God. Isn't this mind blowing? This is the beauty of God. He's not being biased or unfair. He's saying, husbands, love your wife. She may not be godly, she may not be righteous, she may be crazy, you know, but when you love her, you will cause something. You will cause a response out of her that you would begin to see what you desire. And love your husband. He may not be godly, he may not be righteous, he may be acting crazy. But in your submission you become a word. So he may not listen to the word, he may not read his word, but your submission embodies you as a word. And guess what you're one. So if you're a word, it's almost like it's like a sneak attack. It starts hidding him little by little, and it starts breaking off the callousness of the heart. It starts healing things in him that he cannot even understand. And God intervenes, right, and so this is a journey. It takes time, but know that at the end of the day, God is going to walk this out with you. All. This is last and I'll say before we close, when the Bible calls the woman a week of vessel. We talked about this before, but here is something that we didn't say, that didn't share. The Bible doesn't say she is a weak vessel, right, she's a weaker vessel. So the man and the woman are both weak. She is weaker. Why here is a mystery in God. For where I am weak, he is strong. The man is his weakness is in submission to Christ. The woman is weaker because she's in submission to the man. This is not that God is against women. You have to know this because women hear submission. And I'm going back to a godly wife is submissive. Women hear submission because you have to understand submission to embrace every other role. And it's a trigger. It's not that there is an order in God. The Bible doesn't just say she's weak, No weaker, So weaker is comparable to something else that is weak. But he is because first he's not called to lead himself, He's called to submit himself before God. Your call to submit yourself to him. It doesn't change your relationship with God, but your call to also submit to Him. And when you take that posture, guess what, God becomes your strength in my weakness. He is my strength. So God puts us in position of weakness out of love, not hate, not because of insignificance. Out of love. That he becomes your strength. So open your heart, embrace this. Let submission be a word that brings joy to you, not sadness. Okay, up next we are gonna be talking about does God select your spouse? It's gonna be a good one. In the meantime, if this was a blessing to you, you know, share, subscribe, like, and leave a comment. I want I want to know, like what God is speaking to you or the Holy Spirit is sharing with you as you're watching this, and how it is you know, how you're going to apply this word. But in the meantime, we're gonna pray and then we're gonna wrap. And so Heavenly Father, we thank you for the godly women who are watching this, the godly wives who are watching this, because they would know this is not about it's not an event, it's a journey, and that they will trust in you as they are. They avail themselves to you, Holy Spirit, to empower them to walk it out in Jesus' name, Amen at