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Keep Strife Out of Your Life

Joel Osteen
August 28, 2020 31m 13s

About this sermon

Mark 3:25 tells us, “A home filled with strife and division destroys itself.” Let this message teach you how to make and maintain peace. Your best days are still ahead, and together we can make a difference in this world with the message of God's hope and love. To give visit JoelOsteen.com/GiveHope See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Source: Joel Osteen

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0:00:00.680 --> 0:00:03.880 You're ready for a comeback, and with Purdue Global you 0:00:03.920 --> 0:00:07.080 can do more than take classes. You can take charge 0:00:07.400 --> 0:00:11.440 of your story, of your career, of your life, Earn 0:00:11.480 --> 0:00:13.480 a degree you can be proud of, and get an 0:00:13.600 --> 0:00:18.439 education employer's respect. It's time, your time, not just to 0:00:18.480 --> 0:00:20.880 go back to school, but to come back and move 0:00:20.960 --> 0:00:25.760 forward with Purdue Global, produce online university for working adults. 0:00:26.360 --> 0:00:29.840 Start your comeback at Purdueglobal dot edu. 0:00:30.360 --> 0:00:33.080 No one likes to talk about money. Am I saving enough? 0:00:33.159 --> 0:00:35.199 Can I buy a house? Am I paying too much 0:00:35.240 --> 0:00:37.959 in taxes? Will I be able to retire? What if 0:00:37.960 --> 0:00:40.559 you could unlock insights about your finances in less than 0:00:40.560 --> 0:00:43.040 five minutes, with a clear picture of where you stand 0:00:43.080 --> 0:00:45.879 today and where your money can work harder. Now you 0:00:45.960 --> 0:00:48.960 can visit facet dot com to take the free quiz 0:00:49.000 --> 0:00:53.600 and get your financial wellness score today. That's faceet dot com. 0:00:53.600 --> 0:00:55.560 This ad is sponsored by Facet. Fast Wealth in Corporated 0:00:55.640 --> 0:00:57.480 is an sec registered investment advisor. This is not an 0:00:57.520 --> 0:00:58.920 offer to buy your self securities sn or is it 0:00:58.960 --> 0:01:00.000 investment legal or tax fives. 0:01:00.320 --> 0:01:02.240 He'll forget about the video game you gave him on 0:01:02.280 --> 0:01:02.840 his birthday. 0:01:03.160 --> 0:01:05.039 Wow, thanks Grandpa. 0:01:04.880 --> 0:01:07.280 But He'll never forget how you invested in his future 0:01:07.319 --> 0:01:08.280 with the units stapp. 0:01:08.800 --> 0:01:10.480 Wow, Thanks Grandpa. 0:01:11.080 --> 0:01:13.600 The units stap makes it easy for grandparents and family 0:01:13.640 --> 0:01:16.319 friends to give funds to a child's investment account for 0:01:16.360 --> 0:01:18.760 a limited time. Download the uns stap and use the 0:01:18.800 --> 0:01:20.840 code I heeart fifty at sign up to receive a 0:01:20.880 --> 0:01:23.400 fifty dollars bonus when you fund your account. That's code 0:01:23.400 --> 0:01:26.400 iHeart fifty when you sign up at unest dot co 0:01:26.760 --> 0:01:29.319 for a fifty dollars bonus. See terms and conditions at 0:01:29.440 --> 0:01:30.120 UNEs dot co. 0:01:31.120 --> 0:01:34.880 Hi, this is Joel and Victoria. Thanks for downloading our podcast. 0:01:35.120 --> 0:01:37.959 We enjoy spending this time with you. I hope you'll 0:01:38.000 --> 0:01:41.360 leave Inspire. Make sure you subscribe to get new messages 0:01:41.400 --> 0:01:44.440 every week. We appreciate your support. It helps keep the 0:01:44.480 --> 0:01:45.280 ministry going. 0:01:45.680 --> 0:01:58.120 Enjoy the message. 0:01:58.760 --> 0:02:01.400 Well, God bless you. It's always a joy to come 0:02:01.400 --> 0:02:03.840 into your homes. And if you're ever in our area, 0:02:03.920 --> 0:02:05.960 please stop by and be a part of one of 0:02:06.000 --> 0:02:08.919 our services. I'll promise you we'll make you feel right 0:02:09.000 --> 0:02:11.360 at home. But thanks so much for tuning in, and 0:02:11.680 --> 0:02:14.040 thank you again for coming out today. And I like 0:02:14.120 --> 0:02:16.639 to start with something funny and I heard about these 0:02:16.680 --> 0:02:19.919 two ladies that died and went to heaven. Peter met 0:02:19.919 --> 0:02:21.760 them at the gate and said, you'll be. 0:02:21.720 --> 0:02:24.799 Happy here if you follow one main rule. 0:02:25.280 --> 0:02:28.239 Don't step on a duck. If you step on a duck, 0:02:28.280 --> 0:02:31.519 they make a terrible racket. A week later, one of 0:02:31.560 --> 0:02:34.919 the ladies accidentally stepped on a duck. Peter came up 0:02:34.919 --> 0:02:40.200 to her with this extremely unattractive man, nothing appealing about 0:02:40.240 --> 0:02:43.280 him whatsoever, said is your punishment. You're going to be 0:02:43.360 --> 0:02:46.640 chained to this man. Seeing this, the other lady was 0:02:46.840 --> 0:02:50.280 very careful. A month later, Peter came up to her 0:02:50.560 --> 0:02:54.760 with this incredibly handsome man, amazing physique, looked like a 0:02:54.800 --> 0:02:56.440 movie star, chained them together. 0:02:57.080 --> 0:02:58.200 The lady was thrilled. 0:02:58.520 --> 0:03:01.040 She said to him, I don't know what I did 0:03:01.080 --> 0:03:03.959 to deserve getting chained to you. He said, I don't 0:03:04.000 --> 0:03:06.239 know what you did, ma'am, but I stepped on a duck. 0:03:09.520 --> 0:03:12.040 Say it like you mean it. This is my Bible. 0:03:12.440 --> 0:03:14.720 I am what it says I am. I have what 0:03:14.760 --> 0:03:17.160 it says I have. I can do what it says 0:03:17.200 --> 0:03:19.880 I can do. Today I will be taught the word 0:03:19.919 --> 0:03:23.840 of God. I boldly confess my mind is alert, my 0:03:23.960 --> 0:03:24.960 heart is receptive. 0:03:25.280 --> 0:03:28.360 I will never be the same. In Jesus's name. 0:03:29.520 --> 0:03:32.480 I want to talk to you today about keeping strife 0:03:32.600 --> 0:03:36.040 out of your life. One of the biggest challenges we 0:03:36.120 --> 0:03:38.960 all face is getting along with people. 0:03:39.000 --> 0:03:40.440 Because everyone is different. 0:03:41.040 --> 0:03:46.120 We have different personalities, different temperaments, we come from different backgrounds. 0:03:46.880 --> 0:03:50.200 When somebody doesn't agree with us, or they do something 0:03:50.200 --> 0:03:54.680 we don't like, it's easy to get in conflict with them, argue, 0:03:55.320 --> 0:03:56.400 try to straighten them. 0:03:56.280 --> 0:03:57.560 Out, prove our point. 0:03:58.160 --> 0:04:02.520 Before long, we're at odds, mad at each other, living offended, 0:04:02.920 --> 0:04:06.920 their stress, tension in the home. What's happened We've allowed 0:04:07.000 --> 0:04:10.920 strife in Strife is a spirit, just like. 0:04:11.000 --> 0:04:12.080 Peace is a spirit. 0:04:12.920 --> 0:04:16.039 You've walked into a place before. You don't know anybody, 0:04:16.360 --> 0:04:19.359 you've never been there, but you can feel the tension 0:04:19.440 --> 0:04:24.279 in the room, in the atmosphere, there's stress, discord. Nobody 0:04:24.400 --> 0:04:27.400 said anything, but you know something is not right. 0:04:28.000 --> 0:04:30.400 That's the spirit of strife. 0:04:30.640 --> 0:04:33.400 If we would see it as the destructive force that 0:04:33.480 --> 0:04:37.200 it is, we would be more careful about allowing it 0:04:37.279 --> 0:04:42.720 in our lives. After all, it's easy to argue, especially 0:04:42.760 --> 0:04:44.080 with those closest to you. 0:04:44.880 --> 0:04:47.800 Let's be real, your spouse can get on your nerves. 0:04:48.360 --> 0:04:51.600 You love the man, you can't live without him. Sometimes 0:04:51.640 --> 0:04:54.720 you feel like choking him. A reporter asked. 0:04:54.520 --> 0:04:57.279 Billy Graham if he'd ever thought about divorce. 0:04:57.800 --> 0:05:00.000 He said, divorce, no, but murder, yeah. 0:05:00.040 --> 0:05:00.160 Yes. 0:05:02.200 --> 0:05:05.039 But when we let our guard down and say things 0:05:05.080 --> 0:05:10.760 that are hurtful, disrespectful, demeaning, that's not only damaging the relationship, 0:05:11.200 --> 0:05:16.159 that's opening the door to strife. That's inviting that destructive. 0:05:15.600 --> 0:05:19.719 Spirit into our life. That's why the scripture says, give 0:05:20.000 --> 0:05:21.760 no place to the enemy. 0:05:21.880 --> 0:05:25.800 Strife can't just come in when it wants bring division, disharmony, 0:05:26.080 --> 0:05:27.440 tear relationships apart. 0:05:28.000 --> 0:05:29.279 We have to open the door. 0:05:30.160 --> 0:05:32.719 And I'm not saying that we should never have an argument, 0:05:33.279 --> 0:05:34.560 never say a wrong word. 0:05:35.120 --> 0:05:36.160 That's not reality. 0:05:36.920 --> 0:05:39.520 But when it comes a part of who we are, 0:05:40.320 --> 0:05:46.160 it becomes common. We're constantly arguing, fighting, being disrespectful. 0:05:46.440 --> 0:05:47.960 That means we've gone way too far. 0:05:48.720 --> 0:05:52.400 And Jesus said in March chapter three, a home filled 0:05:52.440 --> 0:05:53.680 with strife and. 0:05:53.640 --> 0:05:56.120 Division destroys itself. 0:05:57.000 --> 0:05:59.839 If you allow the spirit of strife in, it'll tear 0:06:00.080 --> 0:06:03.599 part relationships, tear apart your marriage, your family. 0:06:04.279 --> 0:06:09.680 I've seen lifelong friendships destroyed over one disagreement. That's strife 0:06:09.720 --> 0:06:13.040 doing what it does best. Now, you said, Joel, I 0:06:13.040 --> 0:06:13.880 wouldn't get. 0:06:13.680 --> 0:06:17.880 So upset if my coworker wouldn't be disrespectful to me. 0:06:18.680 --> 0:06:21.760 I wouldn't argue if my spouse wouldn't push my buttons. 0:06:22.040 --> 0:06:24.960 That's why we fight all the time. No, you have 0:06:25.040 --> 0:06:29.119 to be the bigger person. Just because somebody is doing 0:06:29.160 --> 0:06:33.679 wrong doesn't mean you have to engage. That's the spirit 0:06:33.800 --> 0:06:39.159 of strife baiting, you saying, come on, let me in argue, fight, 0:06:39.600 --> 0:06:42.320 be disrespectful, don't take the bait. 0:06:43.200 --> 0:06:44.680 It takes a mature. 0:06:44.320 --> 0:06:47.920 Person to overlook an offense and say, no, I'm not 0:06:48.000 --> 0:06:48.800 taking that bait. 0:06:49.120 --> 0:06:54.799 I'm staying in peace. It takes maturity to apologize, even 0:06:54.800 --> 0:06:57.640 when it wasn't your fault. If you're going to. 0:06:57.720 --> 0:07:00.800 Keep strife out, you have to get good at walking 0:07:00.880 --> 0:07:04.640 away when everything in you says to let them have it. 0:07:05.839 --> 0:07:09.040 There will be times when you know you're right, the. 0:07:09.040 --> 0:07:12.760 Other person is being disrespectful, they're not telling the truth, 0:07:13.080 --> 0:07:14.280 but for the sake of. 0:07:14.280 --> 0:07:15.720 Peace, you let it go. 0:07:16.920 --> 0:07:21.960 Jesus said, blessed are the peacemakers. He didn't say blessed 0:07:22.240 --> 0:07:26.120 are the people who are right. Sometimes you have to 0:07:26.200 --> 0:07:29.320 let the other person think they're right, even when you 0:07:29.440 --> 0:07:32.720 know they're wrong. We think, well, if i'm right, I'm 0:07:32.760 --> 0:07:35.240 not going back down. I'm gonna prove to them that 0:07:35.280 --> 0:07:37.840 I'm right. I'm gonna win this battle. Can I tell 0:07:37.880 --> 0:07:42.640 you being right is overrated. You can be right and 0:07:42.720 --> 0:07:46.280 be miserable. You can be right and sleep on the couch. 0:07:47.680 --> 0:07:50.560 You can be right your whole life and have nobody 0:07:50.600 --> 0:07:54.640 at your funeral. You can prove your point always win 0:07:54.720 --> 0:08:00.000 the battle, but you don't realize it's damaging your relationships. 0:08:00.000 --> 0:08:02.640 We're in I don't always agree. One of my. 0:08:02.680 --> 0:08:06.400 Strengths is I won't argue. Things start to get a 0:08:06.400 --> 0:08:10.160 little heated, I walk away. It takes two people to fight. 0:08:10.800 --> 0:08:14.120 You don't have to engage. I would rather have peace 0:08:14.520 --> 0:08:16.040 than have my way. 0:08:16.160 --> 0:08:17.080 I would rather have. 0:08:17.000 --> 0:08:21.160 A loving, kind, fun atmosphere in my home than to 0:08:21.240 --> 0:08:22.080 win the battle. 0:08:22.520 --> 0:08:24.880 But be so miserable, I don't want to be there. 0:08:25.840 --> 0:08:28.680 I've learned if you'll let God do it his way, 0:08:29.000 --> 0:08:31.239 he'll change what needs to be changed. 0:08:31.800 --> 0:08:37.199 God is the potter. We can't change people. Only God can. 0:08:37.920 --> 0:08:40.640 These are tests that we must pass. 0:08:41.040 --> 0:08:43.600 Well, you stay on the high road and bite your 0:08:43.640 --> 0:08:47.520 tongue even when you feel like telling somebody off. Will 0:08:47.559 --> 0:08:51.280 you put your ego down and let somebody else. 0:08:51.080 --> 0:08:53.840 Be right even when you know they're wrong. 0:08:54.600 --> 0:08:58.320 The scripture says one can chase a thousand, but two 0:08:58.640 --> 0:09:03.160 can put ten thousand to flight. When you're in unity, 0:09:03.880 --> 0:09:07.439 the favor on your life is increased. You are ten 0:09:07.559 --> 0:09:11.720 times more powerful when you're in agreement. This means you 0:09:11.840 --> 0:09:17.200 have ten times the strength to withstand attacks, to overcome obstacles. 0:09:17.559 --> 0:09:22.480 You can accomplish dreams ten times bigger, ten times more rewarding. 0:09:23.120 --> 0:09:26.160 You will go so much further if you will keep 0:09:26.320 --> 0:09:30.240 unity in your home. Some of the obstacles you can't 0:09:30.280 --> 0:09:33.480 seem to overcome, the doors that are not opening. 0:09:34.000 --> 0:09:36.079 It may be because. 0:09:35.720 --> 0:09:40.120 You're operating with the strength of one their strife and division. 0:09:40.679 --> 0:09:43.840 You need the ten times power to reach the fullness 0:09:43.840 --> 0:09:47.199 of your destiny. And that person God put in your 0:09:47.240 --> 0:09:50.600 life is not just there for companionship. 0:09:50.960 --> 0:09:54.600 There is a spiritual force released when you live in 0:09:54.679 --> 0:09:55.720 peace and harmony. 0:09:56.480 --> 0:09:59.680 When Victoria and I first got married, like all couples, 0:10:00.120 --> 0:10:01.720 we had to work through some things. 0:10:02.200 --> 0:10:06.480 The scripture says, the two shall become one. You don't 0:10:06.520 --> 0:10:07.600 become overnight. 0:10:08.120 --> 0:10:11.200 It takes some time. Twenty eight years later, I'm still 0:10:11.280 --> 0:10:14.280 training her. I mean she's still training me. But we 0:10:14.400 --> 0:10:17.959 made a decision early on in our relationship that we 0:10:17.960 --> 0:10:19.119 were going to keep. 0:10:18.960 --> 0:10:22.520 Strife out of our home. It didn't happen automatically. 0:10:23.080 --> 0:10:26.600 We're two different people, have two different ways of doing things. 0:10:27.120 --> 0:10:31.800 We had to grow together make allowances overlook some things. 0:10:32.600 --> 0:10:35.800 Had we not stayed on the offensive and worked to 0:10:35.880 --> 0:10:40.079 keep strife out, not only would we not still be together, 0:10:40.320 --> 0:10:43.160 but we wouldn't be where we are. When we were 0:10:43.160 --> 0:10:46.680 believing for this place, the former Compact Center, it was 0:10:46.720 --> 0:10:49.960 going to take more than just my faith. I needed 0:10:49.960 --> 0:10:53.720 that ten times power. This dream was so big the 0:10:53.840 --> 0:10:57.000 only way it could be accomplished is for somebody else 0:10:57.200 --> 0:10:58.760 to come into agreement. 0:10:59.160 --> 0:10:59.959 Says in Psalm. 0:11:00.280 --> 0:11:04.439 Where there's unity, there is a commanded blessing on your life. 0:11:04.640 --> 0:11:07.920 That's when you'll accomplish things that you could not accomplish 0:11:07.960 --> 0:11:12.120 on your own. If we realized what we were giving 0:11:12.240 --> 0:11:17.920 up by allowing all these petty things to tear us apart, strife, discord, 0:11:18.200 --> 0:11:21.120 being at odds with each other, if we really saw 0:11:21.160 --> 0:11:24.520 how that was holding us back, we would work over 0:11:24.640 --> 0:11:28.559 time to keep peace in our life. God has big 0:11:28.600 --> 0:11:31.520 things in your future, but it's going to take more 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:34.040 than just your faith. You're going to need the ten 0:11:34.160 --> 0:11:37.559 times power that comes from having unity in your home. 0:11:38.360 --> 0:11:42.840 Think about what your children can accomplish when you are 0:11:42.840 --> 0:11:46.600 in agreement with your spouse. Ten times the influence, ten 0:11:46.640 --> 0:11:50.240 times creativity, ten times the power. This is one of 0:11:50.240 --> 0:11:53.040 the things that holds us back. It's not our lack 0:11:53.080 --> 0:11:56.679 of talent, education, the background we come from. It's the 0:11:56.720 --> 0:12:01.120 fact that we're operating on one tenth the power. What 0:12:01.160 --> 0:12:03.520 would happen if you would draw the line in the 0:12:03.679 --> 0:12:07.800 sand and say that's it from this day forward, I'm 0:12:07.880 --> 0:12:11.840 keeping strife out of my life. No more arguing, no 0:12:11.960 --> 0:12:16.000 more petty fights, no more saying disrespectful things. 0:12:16.280 --> 0:12:20.760 I'm staying on the high road. I'm not allowing division, discord, 0:12:20.840 --> 0:12:23.960 tension in my home. I'm going to be a peacemaker. 0:12:24.679 --> 0:12:30.040 When you do that, God will release the ten times power, favor, increase, 0:12:30.120 --> 0:12:33.560 blessing like you've never seen. Well, Joel, If I don't 0:12:33.559 --> 0:12:36.320 stand up for myself, if I don't tell people what 0:12:36.400 --> 0:12:37.400 I think, that's. 0:12:37.200 --> 0:12:39.880 Going to make me look weak. It's just the opposite. 0:12:40.520 --> 0:12:43.800 When you go the extra mile to keep strife out 0:12:43.800 --> 0:12:47.160 of your home. That's not being weak. That's a sign 0:12:47.200 --> 0:12:47.760 of strength. 0:12:48.760 --> 0:12:52.080 The most mature person is the one that walks away 0:12:52.120 --> 0:12:52.880 from the argument. 0:12:53.600 --> 0:12:57.000 The most mature person is not always the one that's right. 0:12:57.559 --> 0:12:59.120 It's the one that keeps the peace. 0:13:00.160 --> 0:13:02.680 And you know what, arguing and having to be right 0:13:02.800 --> 0:13:04.840 really boils down to pride. 0:13:05.559 --> 0:13:07.240 I'm not going to let them get the best of me. 0:13:07.840 --> 0:13:11.079 You have to put your ego down and say, I'd 0:13:11.160 --> 0:13:14.320 rather have peace in my life. I would rather have 0:13:14.400 --> 0:13:16.200 the ten times blessing. 0:13:16.240 --> 0:13:17.200 Than just being right. 0:13:18.000 --> 0:13:20.080 This couple I know had been trying to have a 0:13:20.120 --> 0:13:23.680 baby for many years with no success. The lady took 0:13:23.720 --> 0:13:28.400 the infertility treatments. They were praying, believing, doing everything they could, 0:13:28.640 --> 0:13:32.200 but still no child. One day, the man was flying 0:13:32.240 --> 0:13:35.360 home from India. He's a minister and he'd been over 0:13:35.400 --> 0:13:36.440 there teaching the people. 0:13:37.000 --> 0:13:38.359 He was very discouraged. 0:13:38.960 --> 0:13:42.600 Sitting on the flight all alone, he said under his breath, 0:13:42.960 --> 0:13:46.400 God is not fair. I'm over here doing what you've 0:13:46.440 --> 0:13:50.040 asked me to do. Why won't you give us a baby? God, 0:13:50.080 --> 0:13:53.679 I don't understand why we can't have a child. God 0:13:53.760 --> 0:13:55.920 said something back to him, not out loud, but in 0:13:55.960 --> 0:13:58.960 his spirit. He said, son, you're not going to have 0:13:59.000 --> 0:14:02.000 a baby until you start treating your wife better. 0:14:03.080 --> 0:14:05.360 He was a good man, he loved the Lord. 0:14:05.840 --> 0:14:07.959 When you see him out in public, they seemed as 0:14:07.960 --> 0:14:11.960 happy as can be. But deep down he knew he 0:14:12.040 --> 0:14:14.360 wasn't treating his wife the way he should be. 0:14:15.120 --> 0:14:17.760 Wasn't anything big, just little things. 0:14:18.400 --> 0:14:22.760 He'd become disrespectful, saying things that he'd know he shouldn't say, 0:14:23.520 --> 0:14:27.680 become argumentative. Where he used to overlook things let it go, 0:14:27.920 --> 0:14:31.080 now he'd keep it stirred up. He'd become hard to 0:14:31.080 --> 0:14:36.320 get along with, unfriendly, not putting any effort into the relationship. 0:14:37.200 --> 0:14:40.520 The good news is he was willing to change. He 0:14:40.560 --> 0:14:43.640 took it to heart. He made the adjustments. A couple 0:14:43.720 --> 0:14:46.680 of years later, his wife gave birth to a beautiful 0:14:46.760 --> 0:14:47.440 baby daughter. 0:14:47.960 --> 0:14:51.360 Maybe, like my friend, you know you're not being your 0:14:51.440 --> 0:14:54.960 best in this area. You drifted down the wrong path. 0:14:55.640 --> 0:14:59.080 God is not here to condemn us to make us 0:14:59.120 --> 0:15:02.720 feel bad about our ourselves, but he will convict us 0:15:03.200 --> 0:15:08.120 and challenge us to come up higher. Condemnation pushes us down. 0:15:08.320 --> 0:15:11.520 Conviction is there to push us up. But we have 0:15:11.640 --> 0:15:13.880 to do like my friend and say okay, I'm willing 0:15:13.920 --> 0:15:14.680 to change. 0:15:14.960 --> 0:15:16.359 I can make some adjustments. 0:15:16.640 --> 0:15:16.760 Now. 0:15:16.800 --> 0:15:18.880 Don't sit here and think, boy, I wish my husband 0:15:18.880 --> 0:15:22.040 would have come today. He really needs this. No, God 0:15:22.120 --> 0:15:25.880 has the right people here. Don't ask how God can 0:15:25.960 --> 0:15:27.160 change somebody else. 0:15:27.760 --> 0:15:31.960 Look inside and say, God, how can I change? How 0:15:32.000 --> 0:15:35.200 can I get along better with people? Or maybe God, 0:15:35.480 --> 0:15:38.560 what am I doing that's keeping my spouse and eye 0:15:38.920 --> 0:15:39.400 from that. 0:15:39.360 --> 0:15:40.440 Ten times blessing? 0:15:41.240 --> 0:15:43.600 What am I doing that's going to make it harder 0:15:43.680 --> 0:15:46.680 on my children? Passing down things that are going to 0:15:46.720 --> 0:15:51.280 hold them back. What we're modeling in our homes is 0:15:51.320 --> 0:15:54.400 the way our children are going to treat people they 0:15:54.400 --> 0:15:58.400 get in relationship with Mothers. If you want your son 0:15:58.920 --> 0:16:03.080 to have a healthy, loving relationship with his wife, then 0:16:03.120 --> 0:16:06.320 you have to sow a seed by treating your husband 0:16:06.600 --> 0:16:10.320 in a loving, healthy way. Fathers, if you want your 0:16:10.440 --> 0:16:13.760 daughter to be treated with respect and honor, like the 0:16:13.840 --> 0:16:17.600 queen that she is, then make sure you're treating your 0:16:17.640 --> 0:16:19.440 wife like the queen that she is. 0:16:19.760 --> 0:16:21.120 With respect and honor. 0:16:21.400 --> 0:16:26.160 That means not saying everything you feel like saying, not 0:16:26.360 --> 0:16:30.320 pushing the buttons, not allowing the spirit of strife in 0:16:30.360 --> 0:16:33.920 your home. If you don't do it, for yourself. At 0:16:34.000 --> 0:16:36.680 least do it for your children. Do it to make 0:16:36.720 --> 0:16:39.920 it easier on those that come after you. A lot 0:16:39.920 --> 0:16:43.800 of times we think I'll change when they change. When 0:16:43.800 --> 0:16:47.640 he starts treating me better, then I'll be nice to him, Joel, 0:16:47.640 --> 0:16:50.760 when she stops nagging me, then I'll be friendly again. 0:16:51.440 --> 0:16:52.240 Now here's the key. 0:16:52.720 --> 0:16:55.840 The bigger person is the one that makes the first move. 0:16:56.600 --> 0:16:59.680 God will reward you in a greater way if you'll 0:16:59.720 --> 0:17:02.760 take the first step. Pride will tell you. 0:17:02.840 --> 0:17:05.120 Don't do it. They don't deserve it. 0:17:05.640 --> 0:17:08.240 I'm not gonna treat them right when they're treating me wrong. 0:17:09.000 --> 0:17:12.040 You're not just doing it for them. You're doing it 0:17:12.119 --> 0:17:14.960 unto God. You're not just saying. 0:17:14.840 --> 0:17:18.600 I approve your behavior. It's okay to treat me this way. 0:17:19.320 --> 0:17:23.920 You're saying, God, I know the importance of keeping strife. 0:17:23.520 --> 0:17:24.359 Out of my life. 0:17:24.920 --> 0:17:27.320 Even though I don't like this, I'm going to stay 0:17:27.359 --> 0:17:30.760 on the high road and be a peacemaker, knowing that 0:17:30.800 --> 0:17:33.840 you will make it up to me. But human nature 0:17:33.880 --> 0:17:37.280 says to treat people the way they treat us. You 0:17:37.359 --> 0:17:40.320 want to be disrespectful, two people can play at that game. 0:17:40.960 --> 0:17:44.600 You want to be argumentative, unfriendly, sarcastic. You've met your match. 0:17:44.720 --> 0:17:47.960 Let's go. All that's gonna do is make matters worse. 0:17:48.800 --> 0:17:52.640 God brought the people in your life on purpose. It's 0:17:52.680 --> 0:17:56.000 not an accident. It's a part of his divine plan. 0:17:57.000 --> 0:18:01.320 No person is perfect. We all have flawed and weaknesses. 0:18:02.160 --> 0:18:06.200 If you blow that person off because of their issues, 0:18:06.520 --> 0:18:09.760 the problem is the next person you get in relationship 0:18:09.840 --> 0:18:13.199 with will have some kind of issues as well, something 0:18:13.240 --> 0:18:15.720 to get on your nerves. You have to learn this 0:18:15.840 --> 0:18:19.720 principle to rise above it and keep strife out of 0:18:19.760 --> 0:18:20.240 your home. 0:18:21.040 --> 0:18:22.760 You can be the difference. 0:18:22.359 --> 0:18:26.720 Maker when you honor your spouse, When you treat them 0:18:26.760 --> 0:18:29.719 with respect, even when they don't deserve it. 0:18:30.160 --> 0:18:32.120 That's what causes them to come up. 0:18:32.119 --> 0:18:38.040 Higher, not arguing, being disrespectful, pushing them down. It's like 0:18:38.119 --> 0:18:42.000 you're pouring water into a jar with a small cork 0:18:42.040 --> 0:18:42.320 in it. 0:18:42.920 --> 0:18:43.960 The more water you. 0:18:44.040 --> 0:18:48.480 Pour, the higher that cork will rise. Your spouse is 0:18:48.520 --> 0:18:52.879 the cork. Your honor is the water. The more honor 0:18:52.920 --> 0:18:57.600 you pour in, the higher your spouse will rise. Jesus said, 0:18:57.800 --> 0:19:02.280 a house divided is can continually being brought to destruction 0:19:02.920 --> 0:19:07.080 and will not stand when we allow strife in our life. 0:19:07.160 --> 0:19:08.160 Something is happening. 0:19:08.520 --> 0:19:13.360 We're continually going down our relationships, our dreams, our attitudes, 0:19:13.520 --> 0:19:17.640 our energy. You will make better decisions if you'll get 0:19:17.720 --> 0:19:22.280 rid of the discord. You'll be more creative, more productive, 0:19:22.560 --> 0:19:26.439 more successful. If you'll take these steps to keep peace 0:19:26.600 --> 0:19:31.760 in your home where there's unity, God's blessing, his favor, 0:19:31.920 --> 0:19:35.560 his anointing is on your life, your marriage, your career, 0:19:35.880 --> 0:19:36.840 your finances. 0:19:37.119 --> 0:19:39.199 There is power in agreement. 0:19:39.960 --> 0:19:42.920 There's power when you rise up and say, I'm going 0:19:42.960 --> 0:19:46.680 to do everything I can to keep unity in my home. 0:19:47.520 --> 0:19:51.560 My spouse may be argumentative, my children may be hard 0:19:51.600 --> 0:19:53.680 to get along with, But as for me. 0:19:54.080 --> 0:19:55.480 I'm going to be a peacemaker. 0:19:56.160 --> 0:19:59.800 Let me tell you, one peacemaker is more powerful than 0:19:59.840 --> 0:20:03.920 a dozen troublemakers. The piece you bring will have such 0:20:03.960 --> 0:20:07.800 an anointing on it. It will break the forces that 0:20:07.880 --> 0:20:11.520 are trying to tear your family apart. Years ago, Victoria 0:20:11.520 --> 0:20:14.000 and I went on a bike ride with our two children. 0:20:14.560 --> 0:20:17.159 Jonathan was eight years old and he was riding his 0:20:17.200 --> 0:20:20.760 own bike and Alexander was five. She was on the 0:20:20.800 --> 0:20:23.800 bike seat behind me on my bike. I'd had a 0:20:23.840 --> 0:20:28.160 long day. I was kind of irritated at something Victoria 0:20:28.240 --> 0:20:31.280 had done was no big deal, just a small thing. 0:20:31.720 --> 0:20:35.560 But I chose to hold onto it, magnify it, let 0:20:35.600 --> 0:20:36.320 it sour me. 0:20:37.119 --> 0:20:40.080 You know how sometimes it feels good to be ticked off. 0:20:40.760 --> 0:20:43.199 Now I knew it wasn't right, but the flesh loves 0:20:43.240 --> 0:20:45.879 to have its way. I remember thinking, I'm not in 0:20:45.960 --> 0:20:49.680 a good mood. You aggravated me. I'm miserable. I'm gonna 0:20:49.680 --> 0:20:52.240 make your life miserable. You know what I was doing, 0:20:52.760 --> 0:20:56.920 opening the door to trouble. I was inviting that destructive 0:20:57.000 --> 0:21:01.280 strife into our life. James three says, where there's strife, 0:21:01.560 --> 0:21:02.160 there will be. 0:21:02.359 --> 0:21:04.960 Discord, confusion, and trouble. 0:21:05.760 --> 0:21:08.400 So we were out riding on this bike trail, supposed 0:21:08.400 --> 0:21:11.639 to be having fun, but the tension was so thick 0:21:11.800 --> 0:21:14.480 you could cut it with a knife. I was giving 0:21:14.560 --> 0:21:18.399 Victoria the cold shoulder treatment. Not friendly, not talking it 0:21:18.600 --> 0:21:19.440 just matter of fact. 0:21:20.119 --> 0:21:22.200 She said, how was your day? Fine? 0:21:22.359 --> 0:21:25.240 Something wrong? Nothing's wrong? Why are you being unfriendly? I'm 0:21:25.240 --> 0:21:29.440 not being unfriendly, just being hard to get along with. Now, 0:21:29.480 --> 0:21:31.480 don't look at me like I'm the only one that's 0:21:31.480 --> 0:21:34.119 ever done to us. We're gonna let you confess your 0:21:34.160 --> 0:21:39.200 sins next. Jonathan wasn't real sure of riding his bike. 0:21:39.240 --> 0:21:41.080 He'd just been doing it for a little while, and 0:21:41.320 --> 0:21:44.359 we were on this five foot wide bike trail. I 0:21:44.400 --> 0:21:46.840 looked up about one hundred yards in front of me. 0:21:47.119 --> 0:21:50.720 There was this biker coming toward us full speed. He 0:21:50.800 --> 0:21:53.640 looked like a professional, like he was in training, had 0:21:53.680 --> 0:21:56.639 on all of his bike gear, and I said, Jonathan, buddy, 0:21:56.880 --> 0:21:59.440 stay over to the side. This man is coming really 0:21:59.480 --> 0:22:02.200 really fast. Jonathan got over and he was doing fine. 0:22:02.720 --> 0:22:05.480 But when the men got close to us, Jonathan looked 0:22:05.520 --> 0:22:07.879 at him and veered right into his path. 0:22:08.280 --> 0:22:10.520 They had this huge head on collision. 0:22:11.000 --> 0:22:13.760 Jonathan went flying off his bike and the other man 0:22:13.840 --> 0:22:16.840 tumbling over in the grass. And I jumped off my 0:22:16.960 --> 0:22:19.359 bike as fast as I could, and I thought for 0:22:19.440 --> 0:22:22.560 sure he had broken arms, broken legs, his whole bike 0:22:22.640 --> 0:22:27.280 frame was bent. Thankfully, all he had were scrapes and bruises. 0:22:27.640 --> 0:22:30.720 Both he and the other men were fine. As I 0:22:30.840 --> 0:22:34.439 was walking back to the car carrying his bike, I 0:22:34.520 --> 0:22:38.800 felt this impression in here, saying Joel, you opened the 0:22:38.840 --> 0:22:39.920 door to this trouble. 0:22:40.640 --> 0:22:43.000 It could have been avoided if you would have kept 0:22:43.000 --> 0:22:44.200 the strife out. 0:22:44.680 --> 0:22:48.600 That's what the scripture says When we allow strife, it 0:22:48.680 --> 0:22:54.639 opens the door to unnecessary trouble. There will be conflicts, disappointment, 0:22:54.800 --> 0:22:57.440 setbacks that we didn't have to encounter. 0:22:58.480 --> 0:23:00.520 Don't be stubborn like I was. 0:23:01.280 --> 0:23:04.000 We have enough battles to fight in life where we 0:23:04.080 --> 0:23:07.480 don't have a choice. Don't make it harder on yourself 0:23:07.640 --> 0:23:11.159 by opening the door to trouble. Matthew five and the 0:23:11.240 --> 0:23:17.119 Amplified says, blessed are the makers and maintainers of peace. 0:23:17.920 --> 0:23:19.560 We know what it means to make peace. 0:23:20.359 --> 0:23:24.600 We make up after an argument, we apologize, forgive, move forward. 0:23:24.640 --> 0:23:28.479 That's important, but we need to be more aware about 0:23:28.640 --> 0:23:32.640 maintaining our peace. That means you stay on the high road, 0:23:33.240 --> 0:23:37.720 You bite your tongue, you let things go, you don't argue. 0:23:37.800 --> 0:23:42.560 I've found it's much easier to maintain your peace than 0:23:42.600 --> 0:23:46.880 to have to always try to make peace. Victoria aggravated 0:23:46.920 --> 0:23:48.440 me that day, big deal. 0:23:48.960 --> 0:23:49.600 She's human. 0:23:50.240 --> 0:23:54.160 There's not another person alive that you're in relationship with 0:23:54.640 --> 0:23:57.960 that at some point will not irritate you, offend you, 0:23:58.400 --> 0:24:01.640 hurt you, or get on your nerve. Instead of being 0:24:01.720 --> 0:24:06.440 upset every time things don't go your way, be an argumentative, 0:24:06.680 --> 0:24:09.560 giving them the cold shoulder. Why don't you try this 0:24:09.640 --> 0:24:14.359 new approach and start maintaining your peace. Don't open the 0:24:14.440 --> 0:24:18.040 door to strife. When you go the extra mile to 0:24:18.119 --> 0:24:21.439 keep unity in your home, you will not only have 0:24:21.560 --> 0:24:25.879 God's blessing and favor because of the power of agreement, 0:24:26.200 --> 0:24:29.800 but you will have his protection. He'll keep you from 0:24:29.960 --> 0:24:34.440 unnecessary trouble. This can save a marriage today, It can 0:24:34.480 --> 0:24:35.720 save a relationship. 0:24:36.160 --> 0:24:39.680 It's not always big things. Sometimes it's a small thing. 0:24:40.200 --> 0:24:43.320 If you will make these minor adjustments, they can make 0:24:43.400 --> 0:24:48.639 major improvements. Proverbs twenty says avoiding a fight is a 0:24:48.680 --> 0:24:52.800 mark of honor. Sometimes we think winning a fight is 0:24:52.800 --> 0:24:56.040 a mark of honor. We come back after an argument, 0:24:56.520 --> 0:24:59.240 give ourselves a high five and thank boy, I let 0:24:59.240 --> 0:24:59.800 them have it. 0:25:00.359 --> 0:25:03.919 I showed her who was boss. That's not really winning. 0:25:04.680 --> 0:25:07.679 You fed your ego, You made yourself feel good, but 0:25:07.880 --> 0:25:12.280 didn't strengthen the relationship. You may have won in one sense, 0:25:12.920 --> 0:25:16.080 but what did it costs you? How much damage was 0:25:16.119 --> 0:25:20.240 done When we say hurtful words, when we're disrespectful, that's 0:25:20.240 --> 0:25:24.399 a very heavy price. The way to really win is 0:25:24.440 --> 0:25:27.439 to avoid it, to stay on the high road, to 0:25:27.560 --> 0:25:28.159 walk away. 0:25:28.680 --> 0:25:31.840 That's a mark of honor. This takes humility. 0:25:32.480 --> 0:25:35.560 Pride will tell you have the last word, stay at it, 0:25:35.680 --> 0:25:38.680 let them have it. That verse goes on to say 0:25:39.200 --> 0:25:43.639 only a fool loves to argue. Instead of thinking about 0:25:43.880 --> 0:25:47.440 how you can win the argument, strategize and what you're 0:25:47.440 --> 0:25:51.520 gonna say, spend that same time thinking about how you're 0:25:51.520 --> 0:25:54.720 going to avoid the argument. Now, I'm not saying to 0:25:54.760 --> 0:25:58.800 not address issues, but there's a right way and there's 0:25:58.840 --> 0:25:59.720 a right time. 0:26:00.440 --> 0:26:01.119 You should do it. 0:26:01.160 --> 0:26:05.720 Calmly, express your concerns and then leave it there. If 0:26:05.760 --> 0:26:08.800 it starts to get heated disrespectful, that's the. 0:26:08.720 --> 0:26:09.760 Time to walk away. 0:26:10.680 --> 0:26:13.680 If you'll do it God's way, he'll fight your battles. 0:26:14.160 --> 0:26:17.640 He'll change what needs to be changed. Plus, we need 0:26:17.680 --> 0:26:20.880 to ask ourselves what am I arguing over? 0:26:21.680 --> 0:26:22.400 Is it worth it? 0:26:23.280 --> 0:26:27.159 Sometimes we argue over petty things that in the big picture, 0:26:27.520 --> 0:26:30.320 they don't really matter. You may have seen on the 0:26:30.359 --> 0:26:34.879 news a professional football player punched his teammate. 0:26:34.840 --> 0:26:36.920 The quarterback, and broke his jaw. 0:26:37.760 --> 0:26:40.679 He was upset because he had purchased a six hundred 0:26:40.640 --> 0:26:43.359 dollars ticket for the quarterback to come to his event. 0:26:43.920 --> 0:26:45.720 The quarterback wasn't able to make it. 0:26:46.320 --> 0:26:49.199 Instead of handling it the right way, he let his 0:26:49.280 --> 0:26:53.280 emotions take over led to this fight. When the coaches 0:26:53.359 --> 0:26:57.240 found out, he was immediately dismissed from the team. He 0:26:57.320 --> 0:27:01.679 lost his multi million dollar contract act. He let a 0:27:01.760 --> 0:27:07.760 six hundred dollars offense cost him several million dollars. While 0:27:07.760 --> 0:27:11.520 we may not lose millions from an argument, we can 0:27:11.640 --> 0:27:15.480 lose something even more valuable, the people God has put 0:27:15.520 --> 0:27:19.640 in our lives, your spouse, your children, your parents, your friends. 0:27:20.080 --> 0:27:23.720 It's easy to get at odds, let little things build up, 0:27:24.359 --> 0:27:28.439 Say hurtful things here, argue there, disrespectful. One day you 0:27:28.480 --> 0:27:32.679 look up and they're not there anymore. Don't take the 0:27:32.760 --> 0:27:36.160 people in your life for granted. Are you treating them 0:27:36.160 --> 0:27:41.640 with respect and honor? Do they feel treasured, valued, loved? 0:27:42.520 --> 0:27:47.600 Or are you hard to get along with? Unfriendly argumented friends? 0:27:47.720 --> 0:27:52.440 Life is too short to live that way. Where there's disharmony, 0:27:52.480 --> 0:27:56.959 you'll weakened, you won't reach your highest potential. I'm asking 0:27:57.000 --> 0:28:01.280 you today to be a maker and a maintainer of peace. 0:28:01.960 --> 0:28:04.960 Do what you can to keep the atmosphere in your 0:28:04.960 --> 0:28:09.800 home loving, friendly kind, be a person of honor, and 0:28:09.880 --> 0:28:13.560 avoid the fight. Remember one can chase one thousand two 0:28:13.600 --> 0:28:17.080 can put ten thousand to flight if you'll keep strife 0:28:17.080 --> 0:28:21.240 out because there's unity in your home. I believe and 0:28:21.320 --> 0:28:25.000 declare you're going to see that ten times blessing. God 0:28:25.080 --> 0:28:28.200 is going to increase you with more wisdom, more favor. 0:28:28.520 --> 0:28:31.920 You will accomplish dreams and reach the fullness of your 0:28:31.960 --> 0:28:35.800 destiny in Jesus's name. And if you receive it today, 0:28:36.040 --> 0:28:40.000 can you say amen? We never like to close our 0:28:40.000 --> 0:28:43.760 broadcast without giving you an opportunity to make Jesus the 0:28:43.840 --> 0:28:46.040 lord of your life. Would you pray with me? 0:28:46.720 --> 0:28:52.160 Just say, Lord Jesus, I'll repent of my sins. Come 0:28:52.200 --> 0:28:56.000 into my heart. I make you my Lord and savior. 0:28:57.640 --> 0:29:00.120 Friends, if you prayed that simple prayer, we believe if 0:29:00.120 --> 0:29:03.360 you got born again, get in a good Bible based church, 0:29:03.720 --> 0:29:04.920 keep God first place. 0:29:05.240 --> 0:29:07.680 He's going to take your places that you've never dreamed. 0:29:08.200 --> 0:29:11.640 Thank you for listening to the Joel Loustin podcast. Help 0:29:11.720 --> 0:29:14.440 us continue to share the message of hope with those 0:29:14.560 --> 0:29:18.440 all over the world. Visit Joeloustin dot com slash give 0:29:18.520 --> 0:29:20.200 Hope to give a gift today. 0:29:21.480 --> 0:29:23.959 Thanks so much for listening to today's message. 0:29:24.080 --> 0:29:26.800 I hope you'll subscribe so you can receive the latest 0:29:26.840 --> 0:29:29.920 podcast to keep you inspired all through the week. 0:29:30.120 --> 0:29:33.000 We're praying for you. I know God's best is still ahead. 0:29:33.200 --> 0:29:34.360 We'll see you next time. 0:29:41.280 --> 0:29:43.760 More than ever before, people are turning to the church 0:29:43.840 --> 0:29:47.560 for their mental health struggles. Unfortunately, the church has largely 0:29:47.600 --> 0:29:50.880 been ill equipped to help. That is until now. Join 0:29:50.960 --> 0:29:54.000 yourly fifty thousand people just like you who've enrolled in 0:29:54.040 --> 0:29:57.200 the Mental Health Coach training program and become equipped to 0:29:57.280 --> 0:29:59.840 help for a limited time. 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