How To Handle Criticism

0:00:00.200 --> 0:00:02.880 No one likes to talk about money. Am I saving enough? 0:00:02.960 --> 0:00:05.040 Can I buy a house? Am I paying too much 0:00:05.040 --> 0:00:07.760 in taxes? Will I be able to retire? What if 0:00:07.760 --> 0:00:10.360 you could unlock insights about your finances in less than 0:00:10.400 --> 0:00:12.840 five minutes, with a clear picture of where you stand 0:00:12.880 --> 0:00:15.720 today and where your money can work harder. Now you 0:00:15.760 --> 0:00:18.759 can visit facet dot com to take the free quiz 0:00:18.800 --> 0:00:23.400 and get your financial wellness score today. That's Facet dot com. 0:00:23.400 --> 0:00:25.360 This ad is sponsored by Facet. Fast Wealth in Corporated 0:00:25.440 --> 0:00:27.280 is an sec registered investment advisor. This is not an 0:00:27.320 --> 0:00:29.080 offer to buy your self securities or is it investment, 0:00:29.160 --> 0:00:30.080 legal or tax advice. 0:00:30.760 --> 0:00:33.960 You're ready for a comeback, and with Purdue Global you 0:00:34.000 --> 0:00:37.200 can do more than take classes. You can take charge 0:00:37.520 --> 0:00:41.520 of your story, of your career, of your life, Earn 0:00:41.560 --> 0:00:43.559 a degree you can be proud of, and get an 0:00:43.680 --> 0:00:48.559 education employer's respect. It's time, your time, not just to 0:00:48.560 --> 0:00:50.960 go back to school, but to come back and move 0:00:51.040 --> 0:00:55.840 forward with Purdue Global, Purdue's online university for working adults. 0:00:56.440 --> 0:00:59.920 Start your comeback at Purdueglobal dot edu. 0:01:00.280 --> 0:01:02.240 He'll forget about the video game you gave him on 0:01:02.280 --> 0:01:02.840 his birthday. 0:01:03.160 --> 0:01:05.119 Wow, thanks Grandpa. 0:01:04.880 --> 0:01:07.280 But He'll never forget how you invested in his future 0:01:07.319 --> 0:01:11.840 with the uns stapp. Wow. Thanks Grandpa. The units stap 0:01:11.840 --> 0:01:14.360 makes it easy for grandparents and family friends to give 0:01:14.440 --> 0:01:17.160 funds to a child's investment account for a limited time. 0:01:17.280 --> 0:01:19.440 Download the uns stap and use the code I heeart 0:01:19.440 --> 0:01:21.720 fifty at sign up to receive a fifty dollars bonus 0:01:21.720 --> 0:01:24.280 when you fund your account. That's code iHeart fifty when 0:01:24.319 --> 0:01:27.280 you sign up at unest dot co for a fifty 0:01:27.319 --> 0:01:30.120 dollars bonus. See terms and conditions at UNEs dot co. 0:01:31.280 --> 0:01:34.000 Hi, this is Joel and Victoria. Thanks for listening to 0:01:34.040 --> 0:01:36.800 our podcast and thanks for supporting the ministry. 0:01:36.920 --> 0:01:39.280 If you enjoy today's message, why don't you be a 0:01:39.319 --> 0:01:40.840 blessing and share it with a friend. 0:01:41.160 --> 0:01:43.880 We appreciate you and pray for God's very best in 0:01:43.959 --> 0:01:58.960 your life. Well, God bless you. Always enjoy to come 0:01:59.000 --> 0:02:02.040 into your homes. We love you, We know God has 0:02:02.160 --> 0:02:04.240 good things in store for each one of you. And 0:02:04.480 --> 0:02:06.480 if you're ever in our area, I hope you'll come 0:02:06.520 --> 0:02:08.680 out and be a part of one of our services. 0:02:08.800 --> 0:02:11.000 I promise you we'll make you feel right at home. 0:02:11.000 --> 0:02:13.800 But thanks so much for tuning in today. I like 0:02:13.840 --> 0:02:15.960 to get started each week with something kind of funny. 0:02:16.160 --> 0:02:17.920 And I heard about this lady. She was on an 0:02:17.919 --> 0:02:21.720 airplane reading her Bible. The man sitting next to her said, 0:02:21.960 --> 0:02:24.000 you don't believe all that stuff in there, do you? 0:02:24.480 --> 0:02:27.240 She said, sure, I do, it's the Bible. He said, well, 0:02:27.280 --> 0:02:29.840 what about that guy that got swallowed by the well? 0:02:30.160 --> 0:02:32.440 She said, you mean Jonah, Yes, I believe that too. 0:02:33.000 --> 0:02:35.560 He said, well, how could he possibly survive all that 0:02:35.680 --> 0:02:38.760 time inside of a well. She thought about it a moment, 0:02:38.960 --> 0:02:41.120 finally said, I don't know. When I get to heaven, 0:02:41.160 --> 0:02:44.400 I'll have to ask him. He said, sarcastically, What if 0:02:44.400 --> 0:02:46.880 he's not in heaven? She said, then you're going to 0:02:46.919 --> 0:02:51.480 have to ask him. All right, hold up your Bible. 0:02:51.840 --> 0:02:54.600 Say it like you mean it. This is my Bible. 0:02:55.040 --> 0:02:57.640 I am what it says I am. I have what 0:02:57.720 --> 0:03:00.280 it says I have. I can do what it says 0:03:00.360 --> 0:03:03.320 I can do. Today I will be taught the Word 0:03:03.360 --> 0:03:08.120 of God. I boldly confess. My mind is alert, my 0:03:08.280 --> 0:03:11.960 heart is receptive. I will never be the same. I 0:03:12.000 --> 0:03:18.040 am about to receive the incorruptible, indestructible, ever living seed 0:03:18.240 --> 0:03:22.720 of the Word of God. I'll never be the same. Never, never, never, 0:03:23.200 --> 0:03:27.480 I'll never be the same. In Jesus's name, God bless you. 0:03:28.440 --> 0:03:30.560 I want to talk to you today about how to 0:03:30.639 --> 0:03:34.600 handle criticism. Every one of us in life will have 0:03:34.720 --> 0:03:39.200 times when we're being criticized. Somebody's talking about us, trying 0:03:39.200 --> 0:03:42.240 to make us look bad, blowing things out of proportion, 0:03:42.800 --> 0:03:45.840 and these people have no interest in helping us. They're 0:03:45.840 --> 0:03:49.280 just trying to drag us down. And I found most 0:03:49.280 --> 0:03:53.160 criticism is based out of jealousy. It's based out of 0:03:53.160 --> 0:03:57.480 a competitive spirit. You have something that they want, but 0:03:57.560 --> 0:04:01.119 instead of being happy for you, keeping a good attitude, 0:04:01.200 --> 0:04:04.080 knowing that God can do it for them, that jealousy 0:04:04.200 --> 0:04:07.480 rises up. And the way they release it is by talking, 0:04:08.160 --> 0:04:11.440 being critical, being cynical, trying to make you look bad. 0:04:12.000 --> 0:04:15.880 The more successful you are, the more criticism you will encounter. 0:04:16.560 --> 0:04:19.680 You get that promotion at the office, don't be surprised 0:04:19.800 --> 0:04:22.479 if your critics come out of the woodwork. Well, he's 0:04:22.520 --> 0:04:25.760 not that talented. He's just a manipulator. He just plays 0:04:25.839 --> 0:04:28.719 up to the boss or your friends. They may be 0:04:28.880 --> 0:04:31.839 fine as long as you're all single, but the moment 0:04:31.920 --> 0:04:35.400 you get married, don't be surprised if they start talking, well, 0:04:35.440 --> 0:04:40.719 I can't believe he married her. She has no personality whatsoever. See, Unfortunately, 0:04:41.480 --> 0:04:45.400 not everybody will celebrate your victories with you. All your 0:04:45.440 --> 0:04:47.680 single friends may not jump up and down when you 0:04:47.720 --> 0:04:50.680 marry the man of your dreams. Your coworkers may not 0:04:50.800 --> 0:04:54.680 sing your praises when you get that promotion. Very often 0:04:54.720 --> 0:04:58.560 it draws out that jealous, critical spirit. But here's the key, 0:04:58.960 --> 0:05:02.719 you shouldn't take that personally. Many times it's not even 0:05:02.800 --> 0:05:06.440 directed at you. If it wasn't you, it'd be somebody else. 0:05:06.880 --> 0:05:10.239 It's something on the inside of them. Unless they deal 0:05:10.279 --> 0:05:12.480 with it, it's going to keep them from rising higher. 0:05:13.000 --> 0:05:15.680 One of the most important things I've ever learned is 0:05:15.760 --> 0:05:20.000 to celebrate other people's victories. If my co worker gets 0:05:20.040 --> 0:05:24.360 the promotion I wanted, Yes, there's a tendency to be jealous. Yes, 0:05:24.400 --> 0:05:26.960 there's a tendency to think, Man, why didn't that happen 0:05:27.000 --> 0:05:29.520 for me? I work hard, that's not fair. 0:05:30.279 --> 0:05:30.359 No. 0:05:30.720 --> 0:05:33.600 If we'll keep the right attitude and be happy for 0:05:33.680 --> 0:05:36.960 them at the right time, God will open up something 0:05:37.000 --> 0:05:40.039 even better for us. But I found if I can't 0:05:40.080 --> 0:05:42.640 rejoice with them, I'm not going to get to where 0:05:42.680 --> 0:05:45.960 I want to be. How many times does God have 0:05:46.000 --> 0:05:50.159 a promotion in store, But first he sends along a test. 0:05:50.680 --> 0:05:53.760 He wants to see if we're ready. So our best 0:05:53.760 --> 0:05:56.719 friend will get married, but we're still single. Can we 0:05:56.800 --> 0:06:00.800 be happy for or our relatives move into their dream home. 0:06:01.120 --> 0:06:02.920 We've been praying for years, but we're still in a 0:06:02.920 --> 0:06:06.400 little apartment. That's a test. And if we get jealous 0:06:06.600 --> 0:06:09.960 and start finding fault with them, start being critical, it's 0:06:10.000 --> 0:06:12.679 going to keep us right where we are. Let's learn 0:06:12.839 --> 0:06:17.200 to celebrate other people's victories. Let it inspire you know 0:06:17.279 --> 0:06:19.719 that if God did it for them, he can certainly 0:06:19.720 --> 0:06:23.159 do it for you. But too many people today fall 0:06:23.160 --> 0:06:28.440 into that trap of being jealous. There's so much competitiveness 0:06:28.440 --> 0:06:31.800 and even cynicism in our society today, and if we're 0:06:31.839 --> 0:06:33.680 going to be our best, we need to know how 0:06:33.720 --> 0:06:36.920 to deal with people that are talking about us, people 0:06:36.920 --> 0:06:40.560 that are judging us, people that are even making false accusations. 0:06:41.200 --> 0:06:44.599 And in the Old Testament, these people were called slingers, 0:06:45.240 --> 0:06:47.760 and the way they got their name is when an 0:06:47.880 --> 0:06:51.360 enemy went to attack a city. Many times, the first 0:06:51.360 --> 0:06:54.680 thing they would do was take the stones off of 0:06:54.680 --> 0:06:58.119 the wall that was protecting that city, and they would 0:06:58.160 --> 0:07:02.200 sling those stones into their wells. They knew if they 0:07:02.200 --> 0:07:05.120 could get the wells clogged up with these stones, then 0:07:05.160 --> 0:07:07.760 eventually the people would have to come out, their water 0:07:07.800 --> 0:07:11.040 supply would be gone. And it's the same parallel today. 0:07:11.440 --> 0:07:14.360 We all have a well of good things on the inside, 0:07:14.840 --> 0:07:17.240 a well of joy, a well of peace, a well 0:07:17.240 --> 0:07:20.960 of victory. But too often we let the slingers clog 0:07:21.080 --> 0:07:25.200 up our wells. Somebody's talking about us. Instead of letting 0:07:25.240 --> 0:07:29.680 it go, we go around dwelling on it, upset, thinking, man, 0:07:29.880 --> 0:07:32.040 I'm gonna pay you back. You're talking about me. Let 0:07:32.120 --> 0:07:34.640 me tell you what I know about them. Now, you 0:07:34.760 --> 0:07:38.160 have to make it a priority to keep your well pure. 0:07:39.000 --> 0:07:42.320 Somebody's being critical towards you. Somebody's trying to show you 0:07:42.440 --> 0:07:46.000 in a bad light. Recognize that's a stone come in 0:07:46.040 --> 0:07:50.040 your way. If you start dwelling on it, get upset 0:07:50.120 --> 0:07:54.640 and get revengeful, they've accomplished their goal. They landed another 0:07:54.720 --> 0:07:58.080 stone in your well. Now the joy, the peace, the 0:07:58.160 --> 0:08:01.440 victory gets a little more restrict Does it flow like 0:08:01.480 --> 0:08:05.520 it should? Really? We all have slingers in our lives, 0:08:06.040 --> 0:08:07.920 people that are going to try to bring us down 0:08:08.240 --> 0:08:11.280 with their words. They may be a friend to your face, 0:08:11.520 --> 0:08:14.040 but you know behind your back they would cut you 0:08:14.160 --> 0:08:17.440 up and down. What are they doing slinging another stone. 0:08:18.160 --> 0:08:22.760 The way you overcome is not to get revengeful. Don't 0:08:22.800 --> 0:08:25.720 sink down to their level and start talking bad about them. 0:08:26.360 --> 0:08:29.640 Don't get defensive trying to prove that you're right and 0:08:29.680 --> 0:08:33.040 they're wrong. Now, the way you really defeat a slinger 0:08:33.440 --> 0:08:35.760 is to just shake it off, just let it go. 0:08:36.600 --> 0:08:39.800 This is what Jesus told his disciples. He sent them 0:08:39.800 --> 0:08:42.400 out to the different towns to teach the people and 0:08:42.440 --> 0:08:45.240 to care for their needs. But he knew they would 0:08:45.280 --> 0:08:49.839 suffer rejection. He knew not everybody would like them. Some 0:08:49.880 --> 0:08:52.760 people would get jealous and start talking and trying to 0:08:52.800 --> 0:08:55.120 make them look bad. In other words, he knew the 0:08:55.240 --> 0:08:58.080 slingers would be out there, and so he said in 0:08:58.120 --> 0:09:01.520 Matthew ten, verse fourteen, when you go into a town, 0:09:02.240 --> 0:09:06.520 whoever will not receive and welcome your message. When you 0:09:06.640 --> 0:09:10.280 leave that place, shake the dust off of your feet. 0:09:10.640 --> 0:09:12.880 Notice he didn't say if they start talking about you 0:09:12.880 --> 0:09:16.240 in spreading rumors, get revengeful and try to pay him back. 0:09:16.760 --> 0:09:19.480 He didn't say to get defensive and try to set 0:09:19.520 --> 0:09:23.480 the record straight. He simply said, shake the dust off 0:09:23.480 --> 0:09:26.520 of your feet. That was a symbolic way of saying, 0:09:26.880 --> 0:09:29.760 you're not gonna steal my joy. You may be talking 0:09:29.800 --> 0:09:32.280 about me, but I'm not gonna sink down to your level. 0:09:32.600 --> 0:09:34.280 I'm not gonna get in there and fight with you. 0:09:34.480 --> 0:09:37.880 I'm gonna let God be my vindicator. Sometimes when you 0:09:37.960 --> 0:09:41.400 leave the office, you gotta shake it off people talking 0:09:41.480 --> 0:09:44.680 playing politics, trying to bring you down. Don't take that 0:09:44.800 --> 0:09:49.120 junk home. Shake it off. Sometimes, even leaving your relatives house, 0:09:49.360 --> 0:09:54.120 I'm shaking this off. I'm not gonna drink it their poison. Well, 0:09:54.200 --> 0:09:57.600 you say, Joel, I heard one of my competitors at 0:09:57.640 --> 0:10:01.480 work is talking about me. I'm gonna fight fire with fire. 0:10:01.480 --> 0:10:03.760 I'm gonna let him have it. Now, that's not the 0:10:03.760 --> 0:10:07.240 way you win. Let God be your vindicator. If you'll 0:10:07.240 --> 0:10:09.760 stay on the high road, God will fight your battles 0:10:09.760 --> 0:10:12.960 for you. But you never really win by sinking down 0:10:12.960 --> 0:10:16.679 to their level and attacking them personally. Rise above that. 0:10:17.280 --> 0:10:21.360 When somebody's being critical and negative towards you, just recognize, 0:10:21.400 --> 0:10:25.000 here comes another stone, and our attitude should be I'm 0:10:25.040 --> 0:10:27.840 smarter than that. I'm not gonna let their stone clog 0:10:27.960 --> 0:10:29.960 up my well. In other words, I'm not gonna let 0:10:30.000 --> 0:10:33.079 their jealous spirit poison my life. I'm gonna stay full 0:10:33.120 --> 0:10:35.880 of joy. And some of you today you don't have 0:10:35.960 --> 0:10:39.320 the victory that you should because you're not shaking things off. 0:10:39.920 --> 0:10:43.120 You're letting the slingers get the best of you. Dwelling 0:10:43.160 --> 0:10:45.920 on the criticism and who's talking about you and who 0:10:45.960 --> 0:10:50.040 rejected you, your wells all clogged up. I think about 0:10:50.040 --> 0:10:53.160 the apostle Paul. One time he was shipwrecked on a 0:10:53.200 --> 0:10:56.000 small island and he went to pick up some firewood 0:10:56.200 --> 0:10:59.319 and a poisonous snake bit him. The people thought he 0:10:59.360 --> 0:11:02.360 would immediately die. And that's kind of what it's like 0:11:02.679 --> 0:11:06.640 when somebody criticizes us, When somebody's talking behind our back, 0:11:07.200 --> 0:11:09.400 trying to put us in a bad light, we can 0:11:09.440 --> 0:11:12.600 feel the stem of their words. But I love what 0:11:12.720 --> 0:11:16.400 Paul did. He just shook it off. One translation says 0:11:16.679 --> 0:11:20.200 he simply shook it off. In other words, no big deal. 0:11:20.640 --> 0:11:23.160 I'm not gonna let this thing bother me. It may 0:11:23.360 --> 0:11:26.640 be poisonous, it may look big, but I know God's 0:11:26.640 --> 0:11:29.400 in control. I know God will fight my battles for me. 0:11:30.040 --> 0:11:33.200 And do you know that snake bite never did harm Paul. 0:11:34.000 --> 0:11:36.960 Yes it was poisonous, Yes it was harmful, but he 0:11:37.040 --> 0:11:40.880 knew this secret of simply shaking it all. But a 0:11:40.880 --> 0:11:43.800 lot of people today they let these negative words and 0:11:43.960 --> 0:11:48.080 what people think about them totally run their life. They 0:11:48.160 --> 0:11:50.880 live to please everybody and try to keep them happy. 0:11:51.240 --> 0:11:53.720 They don't want anybody to ever say a negative word 0:11:53.800 --> 0:11:58.080 about them. The problem with that is it's impossible. You 0:11:58.200 --> 0:12:01.839 have to accept the fact that not everybody's gonna like you, 0:12:02.480 --> 0:12:06.680 not everybody's gonna accept you, and you certainly cannot keep 0:12:06.720 --> 0:12:11.120 everybody happy. Some people, no matter what you do for them, 0:12:11.240 --> 0:12:14.679 they're gonna find some reason to find fault. You can 0:12:14.720 --> 0:12:17.080 be there for them a thousand times in a row, 0:12:17.200 --> 0:12:19.560 but that one time you can't show up, they're gonna 0:12:19.559 --> 0:12:22.880 start talking, start bad mouthing you. Listen, life is too 0:12:22.920 --> 0:12:26.320 short to try to keep people like that happy. And yes, 0:12:26.600 --> 0:12:29.880 we should be kind, we should be loving, but don't 0:12:29.920 --> 0:12:34.120 spend all your time trying to please somebody that's impossible 0:12:34.120 --> 0:12:37.560 to please. Until they deal with their own issues on 0:12:37.600 --> 0:12:40.800 the inside, they're not gonna be happy and people like that, 0:12:41.040 --> 0:12:43.720 it's much better to just love them from a distance, 0:12:44.280 --> 0:12:46.440 say you know what, I'm not gonna play up to them. 0:12:46.520 --> 0:12:49.000 I'm not gonna try to keep them happy, because I 0:12:49.120 --> 0:12:51.680 know no matter what I do or don't do, a 0:12:51.720 --> 0:12:54.720 month later, they're gonna be running me down. There is 0:12:54.760 --> 0:12:57.480 a real freedom when you accept the fact that not 0:12:57.559 --> 0:13:02.440 everybody's gonna like youriptures as in Proverbs, a gossiping, fault 0:13:02.520 --> 0:13:07.240 finding tongue is like a venomous snake. People's words, if 0:13:07.280 --> 0:13:11.040 we allow them, can poison our lives. If somebody's talking 0:13:11.080 --> 0:13:14.319 about you, don't go around dwelling on it three days. 0:13:14.480 --> 0:13:18.000 You have to immediately shake that off. The longer you 0:13:18.120 --> 0:13:21.520 think about it, the more venom goes into you. I know, 0:13:21.520 --> 0:13:24.040 if somebody comes up to me to tell me something 0:13:24.120 --> 0:13:27.160 bad somebody said about myself or my family, first thing 0:13:27.240 --> 0:13:29.600 I'll do is try to stop them, say, you know what, 0:13:29.640 --> 0:13:31.640 I don't really want to hear that. I don't want 0:13:31.640 --> 0:13:35.040 to get that poison on the inside. I found it's 0:13:35.080 --> 0:13:37.480 a lot easier to shake things off if you don't 0:13:37.520 --> 0:13:40.680 know all the details. So if somebody's talking about you, 0:13:41.080 --> 0:13:43.160 don't go home and call seven of your friends say 0:13:43.200 --> 0:13:46.040 what do you hear about this? No, just shake it 0:13:46.080 --> 0:13:49.240 off and remember, most of the time it's not really 0:13:49.280 --> 0:13:52.120 about you. It's the fact that they hadn't dealt with 0:13:52.160 --> 0:13:55.880 that jealous, critical spirit on the inside. But we can't 0:13:55.920 --> 0:13:59.559 live with this idealistic view of life where we think 0:14:00.080 --> 0:14:03.200 a good person JUELI, I'm kind, I'm loving, Nobody's gonna 0:14:03.200 --> 0:14:06.720 talk bad about me. No. Sometimes the nicer you are, 0:14:06.960 --> 0:14:09.560 the more people will talk about you. It's because the 0:14:09.600 --> 0:14:12.440 good in you stirs up the bad in them. They 0:14:12.480 --> 0:14:16.160 feel convicted by the purity of your heart. I mean 0:14:16.200 --> 0:14:19.200 you can. You can go out and feed the poor, 0:14:19.280 --> 0:14:21.680 you can go mow your neighbor's lawn. You'd think they'd 0:14:21.680 --> 0:14:24.240 be happy, but no, here comes that jealous spirit. Well, 0:14:24.280 --> 0:14:26.280 who do they think they are, Mister goodie too shoes? 0:14:27.760 --> 0:14:29.920 Why do they get to work every day early? He 0:14:30.080 --> 0:14:32.640 just playing up to the boss. Why she's so friendly 0:14:32.640 --> 0:14:34.720 to everybody all the time, She's just trying to get something. 0:14:35.080 --> 0:14:37.120 This is the best thing you can do is just 0:14:37.200 --> 0:14:41.280 shake that off. Some people are just slingers. They wan't 0:14:41.360 --> 0:14:43.840 do what they know they should do to be their best, 0:14:44.240 --> 0:14:46.680 so they feel like they got to tear you down 0:14:47.000 --> 0:14:51.440 to help ease their conscience. When you hear those negative comments, 0:14:51.440 --> 0:14:55.160 those false accusations, your attitude should be no big deal, 0:14:55.480 --> 0:14:58.120 just another slinger and I've already made up my mind, 0:14:58.200 --> 0:15:00.640 no more stones going into my well. I'm gonna live 0:15:00.640 --> 0:15:03.680 my life free. You know what those slingers really are. 0:15:03.920 --> 0:15:07.600 They're distractions. They're trying to get you to lose focus 0:15:07.960 --> 0:15:10.520 on what you really should be doing. But you shouldn't 0:15:10.560 --> 0:15:14.360 waste five seconds of your emotional energy trying to figure 0:15:14.400 --> 0:15:17.200 out why somebody said something or what they really meant. 0:15:17.320 --> 0:15:21.080 That's a distraction. And you only have so much energy 0:15:21.160 --> 0:15:25.160 each day. If you don't shake this off immediately, you 0:15:25.240 --> 0:15:26.920 want to have the strength to do what you really 0:15:26.960 --> 0:15:29.040 need to be doing, you'll go to work and not 0:15:29.120 --> 0:15:31.640 be able to give it your best. You'll come home 0:15:31.680 --> 0:15:34.560 and not really want to interact with your family. It's 0:15:34.560 --> 0:15:38.320 because you're emotionally drained. You got distracted and poured all 0:15:38.360 --> 0:15:42.040 your energy into something that really didn't even matter. And 0:15:42.120 --> 0:15:45.720 we have to recognize we cannot stop people from talking. 0:15:46.000 --> 0:15:48.360 It's a free world. If you're trying to be the 0:15:48.400 --> 0:15:51.360 gossip police and make sure that nobody ever says a 0:15:51.400 --> 0:15:54.120 negative thing about you, you're going to live a frustrated 0:15:54.160 --> 0:15:57.160 life now. Except the fact that people are gonna talk. 0:15:57.560 --> 0:16:00.400 People are gonna make cutting remarks. But the good news 0:16:00.480 --> 0:16:03.000 is you don't have to drink of their poison. You 0:16:03.040 --> 0:16:04.840 can rise above it. You can stay on the high 0:16:04.920 --> 0:16:08.840 road and enjoy your life anyway. I don't know about you, 0:16:09.720 --> 0:16:12.200 but I don't have time to sit around thinking about 0:16:12.200 --> 0:16:15.680 all the people that don't like me. I realize every 0:16:15.760 --> 0:16:18.760 day is a gift from God, and my time is 0:16:18.840 --> 0:16:21.880 way too valuable to go around trying to figure out 0:16:22.120 --> 0:16:25.160 how I can please everybody and make them understand me 0:16:25.240 --> 0:16:28.760 and change their mind. No, I've already accepted the fact 0:16:29.320 --> 0:16:31.800 not only is not everybody going to like me, but 0:16:31.880 --> 0:16:35.240 not everybody is going to understand me. You don't have 0:16:35.360 --> 0:16:38.960 to try to explain yourself. Don't spend all your time 0:16:39.040 --> 0:16:42.080 trying to win your critics over. Just run your own race. 0:16:43.080 --> 0:16:46.080 I know I start off every morning searching my own heart. 0:16:46.840 --> 0:16:49.840 I make sure to the best of my ability that 0:16:49.880 --> 0:16:52.000 I'm doing what I believe God wants me to do. 0:16:52.600 --> 0:16:55.320 And I know, as long as I feel good about 0:16:55.360 --> 0:16:57.200 it in my own heart, as long as down in 0:16:57.240 --> 0:16:59.680 here I feel like I'm on course, that's all that matters. 0:17:00.320 --> 0:17:04.119 You cannot let the critics and the negative voices distract you. 0:17:04.920 --> 0:17:08.800 I know people today they spend more time focused on 0:17:08.840 --> 0:17:11.439 what other people are saying about them than they do 0:17:11.480 --> 0:17:15.359 their own dreams and goals. But understand, if you're gonna 0:17:15.440 --> 0:17:18.320 do anything great in life, if you're going to be 0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:22.280 a great teacher, a great business person, a great athlete, 0:17:22.920 --> 0:17:26.639 not everybody is going to be your cheerleader. Not everybody 0:17:26.720 --> 0:17:29.920 is going to be excited about your dreams. In fact, 0:17:30.440 --> 0:17:33.040 some people are gonna be downright jealous. Some people are 0:17:33.080 --> 0:17:36.280 going to start to find fault and criticize. It's so 0:17:36.359 --> 0:17:39.280 important you learn to shake it off because the moment 0:17:39.680 --> 0:17:43.280 you start changing to try to please people, the moment 0:17:43.560 --> 0:17:45.399 you say, you know what, I'm not gonna show up 0:17:45.400 --> 0:17:47.879 at work early anymore because they're starting to talk about me, 0:17:48.680 --> 0:17:50.840 or I'm not gonna buy that car that I really 0:17:50.880 --> 0:17:53.320 want because I know people are gonna judge, people are 0:17:53.359 --> 0:17:56.719 gonna condemn me. Now listen, I found no matter what 0:17:56.800 --> 0:18:00.280 you do or don't do, somebody's gonna talk is going 0:18:00.280 --> 0:18:02.800 to be critical. You might as well do what God 0:18:02.840 --> 0:18:05.439 has put in your heart and just trust him to 0:18:05.480 --> 0:18:09.160 take care of the critics. One thing that I'm good 0:18:09.200 --> 0:18:12.760 at is staying focused. I don't allow what people are 0:18:12.800 --> 0:18:16.679 saying to get me distracted. I realize not everybody's going 0:18:16.760 --> 0:18:19.720 to understand me, and it's not my job to spend 0:18:19.760 --> 0:18:22.760 all my time trying to convince them to change their mind. 0:18:23.480 --> 0:18:26.600 I know I'm called to plan a seed of hope 0:18:26.640 --> 0:18:32.000 in people's hearts. I'm not called to teach deep theological truths. 0:18:32.040 --> 0:18:35.120 I'm not called to explain any deep kind of doctrine. 0:18:35.359 --> 0:18:39.520 My gifting is to encourage, to challenge, to inspire. People 0:18:39.560 --> 0:18:41.280 say well, Joe, he's not enough of this, or he's 0:18:41.320 --> 0:18:44.439 too much of this. Listen. If I changed with every critic, 0:18:44.480 --> 0:18:47.159 I wouldn't have a chance. Now, I believe one reason 0:18:47.359 --> 0:18:53.000 God has promoted me. One reason God has promoted me 0:18:53.640 --> 0:18:56.080 is because that I stayed true to who I am 0:18:56.720 --> 0:18:59.239 and I have not let people talk me out of 0:18:59.280 --> 0:19:01.560 doing what I know in my heart. God wants me 0:19:01.640 --> 0:19:05.800 to go. Some of you today, you need to get 0:19:05.840 --> 0:19:09.000 free from trying to please everybody. You need to break 0:19:09.119 --> 0:19:12.199 free from worrying that somebody's going to criticize you, and 0:19:12.280 --> 0:19:16.240 just remember, if you're criticized, you're in good company. Jesus 0:19:16.280 --> 0:19:20.639 was probably criticized more than anybody. He got criticized for 0:19:20.760 --> 0:19:23.199 healing a man on the Sabbath, in other words, for 0:19:23.240 --> 0:19:26.480 doing something good. He was criticized for going to dinner 0:19:26.520 --> 0:19:29.360 with a tax collector. They called him a friend of sinners. 0:19:29.560 --> 0:19:32.760 He was criticized for helping a lady in need, somebody 0:19:32.760 --> 0:19:35.399 that they were about to stone. But one thing I 0:19:35.440 --> 0:19:38.760 love about Jesus is he didn't change to try to 0:19:38.800 --> 0:19:42.480 fit into everybody's mind. He didn't try to explain himself 0:19:42.520 --> 0:19:45.800 and make everybody understand him. He just ran his race. 0:19:46.160 --> 0:19:48.040 He didn't look to the left or to the right. 0:19:48.280 --> 0:19:51.240 He stayed focused on the prize that was set before him. 0:19:51.440 --> 0:19:55.359 He fulfilled his destiny. And this really helped to set 0:19:55.400 --> 0:19:57.960 me free because there was a time in my life 0:19:58.040 --> 0:20:00.679 where I really wanted everybody to like me. It's just 0:20:00.720 --> 0:20:03.200 a part of my personality. And if I ever heard 0:20:03.240 --> 0:20:06.560 somebody say one negative comment, I thought, oh man, I failed. 0:20:06.880 --> 0:20:09.040 What have I done wrong? Where do I need to change? 0:20:09.600 --> 0:20:13.240 One day I realized it's impossible to have everybody like you. 0:20:13.600 --> 0:20:16.160 And that's why now I don't let my critics upset 0:20:16.200 --> 0:20:18.520 me and steal my joy. I know most of the 0:20:18.520 --> 0:20:21.320 time it's not about me, it's about the success God's 0:20:21.359 --> 0:20:25.520 given me. Stirs up the jealousy in them. If you're 0:20:25.560 --> 0:20:28.720 making a difference in your family, if you're making a 0:20:28.760 --> 0:20:31.040 difference at the office, if you're making a difference in 0:20:31.080 --> 0:20:33.960 your workplace, you're going to have your share of critics. 0:20:34.400 --> 0:20:36.440 The higher you go, the more people going to want 0:20:36.440 --> 0:20:39.440 to take shots at you. I think about the Apostle Paul. 0:20:39.920 --> 0:20:43.560 He had great crowds following him, but time and time again, 0:20:43.760 --> 0:20:46.159 the people got jealous, They got all stirred up and 0:20:46.280 --> 0:20:48.840 ran him out of town. What did Paul do? Get 0:20:48.880 --> 0:20:52.440 all depressed and say, God, I'm trying to do my best. 0:20:52.560 --> 0:20:55.320 Nobody understands me. They keep criticizing me, running me out 0:20:55.359 --> 0:20:57.399 of town. Now you know what he did. He shook 0:20:57.440 --> 0:21:00.240 the dust off of his feet. He was saying, in act, 0:21:00.440 --> 0:21:03.040 it's your loss, not mine, because I'm gonna do great 0:21:03.080 --> 0:21:05.960 things for God. I'm not gonna lie your rejection, your 0:21:06.000 --> 0:21:08.560 negative words, They're not gonna keep me from my destiny. 0:21:09.119 --> 0:21:11.920 His attitude was sling all you want to I've got 0:21:11.960 --> 0:21:14.760 a lid on my well. I'm not gonna let you 0:21:15.000 --> 0:21:19.640 poison my life. I heard somebody say, if people run 0:21:19.680 --> 0:21:21.520 you out of town, just get to the front of 0:21:21.520 --> 0:21:24.760 the line and act like you're leading the parade. In 0:21:24.800 --> 0:21:28.040 other words, shake it off and keep moving forward. I 0:21:28.080 --> 0:21:31.439 love the scripture in Isaiah. No weapon formed against us 0:21:31.480 --> 0:21:35.560 will prosper, But every tongue raised against us in judgment 0:21:35.960 --> 0:21:38.840 you will show to be in the wrong. We all 0:21:38.920 --> 0:21:42.440 have these tongues that come against us in judgment, in criticism. 0:21:42.800 --> 0:21:44.680 But if you can just stay on the high road 0:21:45.000 --> 0:21:47.520 and keep doing your best, you will show it to 0:21:47.600 --> 0:21:50.480 be in the wrong. In other words, God will pour 0:21:50.520 --> 0:21:55.360 out his favor in spite of your critics. Understand, your 0:21:55.400 --> 0:21:58.960 destiny is not tied to what people are saying about you. 0:22:00.000 --> 0:22:02.840 Critics told us we'd never get this building. They told 0:22:02.920 --> 0:22:05.639 us we didn't have a chance. In fact, one man 0:22:05.920 --> 0:22:09.080 was at a big business luncheon with all the city leaders. 0:22:09.560 --> 0:22:11.719 He told the people at his table, it'll be a 0:22:11.760 --> 0:22:14.720 cold day in hell before Lake could ever gets the 0:22:14.760 --> 0:22:17.800 Compact Center. When I heard that, I did just what 0:22:17.840 --> 0:22:20.720 I'm asking you to do. I shook it off. I 0:22:20.800 --> 0:22:24.080 knew our destiny was not tied to one goofball. I 0:22:24.119 --> 0:22:29.960 mean one man. I knew that was just a distraction, 0:22:31.359 --> 0:22:34.560 and I realized not everybody was going to understand. I 0:22:34.600 --> 0:22:37.159 heard people saying, why do they need to move. Why 0:22:37.200 --> 0:22:39.200 do they want a bigger church? Why are they leaving 0:22:39.240 --> 0:22:42.520 their roots? People were talking many times. I wanted to 0:22:42.520 --> 0:22:44.679 get in there and try to explain it and convince 0:22:44.720 --> 0:22:46.720 them that it was a good idea, But I knew 0:22:46.960 --> 0:22:51.200 not everybody wanted to understand, not everybody had an open mind, 0:22:51.359 --> 0:22:53.760 so we just shook it off and kept pressing forward. 0:22:54.280 --> 0:22:56.720 I guess today it's a cold day in hell because 0:22:56.760 --> 0:23:04.720 here we are but friends, your destiny is not tied 0:23:04.800 --> 0:23:08.199 to your critics. God has the final say, and some 0:23:08.240 --> 0:23:10.760 of you need to get your fire back and quit 0:23:10.840 --> 0:23:13.359 listening to what the naysayers are telling you, quit living 0:23:13.400 --> 0:23:16.640 to please people. Just shake that off and keep pressing 0:23:16.680 --> 0:23:20.439 forward in life. Another important key is don't allow the 0:23:20.480 --> 0:23:23.919 criticism to change you. We need to be tough on 0:23:23.960 --> 0:23:27.720 the outside, but you have to stay tender on the inside. 0:23:28.440 --> 0:23:32.679 Too often we become hard and critical and cynical if 0:23:32.720 --> 0:23:35.720 we're not careful. When we've seen people be two faced, 0:23:36.160 --> 0:23:39.600 when we've seen hypocritical people that talk behind our back, 0:23:39.880 --> 0:23:42.440 it's easy to let their poison get on the inside 0:23:42.440 --> 0:23:45.080 of us and start to change us. But you've got 0:23:45.080 --> 0:23:47.760 to keep those stones out of your well. You've got 0:23:47.800 --> 0:23:50.760 to keep your heart pure and learn to stay true 0:23:51.119 --> 0:23:53.680 to who God has made you to be. I found 0:23:53.760 --> 0:23:57.879 sometimes when people see little quirks in our personality or 0:23:57.920 --> 0:24:00.480 even something about our appearance, they start to kind of 0:24:00.480 --> 0:24:05.320 make fun of it. Very often we overcompensate. It starts 0:24:05.840 --> 0:24:09.919 affecting our personality and the way we carry ourselves. But 0:24:09.960 --> 0:24:14.199 we cannot let people's cutting remarks and their insensitive words 0:24:14.240 --> 0:24:17.480 to cause us to be overly self conscious and start 0:24:17.520 --> 0:24:20.880 to change. Or remember a friend of mine in high school. 0:24:21.400 --> 0:24:25.800 He was very popular, very well liked, fun and outgoing, 0:24:26.320 --> 0:24:30.360 but he had a very unusual laugh. It was real 0:24:30.520 --> 0:24:34.520 high pitched, real distinct, And one day a couple of 0:24:34.520 --> 0:24:37.840 our friends started making fun of him. They were going 0:24:37.880 --> 0:24:40.560 around the school imitating his laugh, and they didn't mean 0:24:40.640 --> 0:24:43.159 any harm. They were just trying to have fun. But 0:24:43.280 --> 0:24:46.800 I noticed how this young man started to change. He 0:24:46.880 --> 0:24:50.920 quit laughing as much, He got much more quiet and reserved. 0:24:51.400 --> 0:24:53.440 Here At one time he was a life of the party, 0:24:53.760 --> 0:24:57.280 fun and outgoing, but little by little he began to change. 0:24:57.359 --> 0:24:59.520 And I know it was because those guys were making 0:24:59.520 --> 0:25:02.119 fun of him. He didn't know to shake it off. 0:25:02.480 --> 0:25:05.640 He let it get down on the inside. He started thinking, man, 0:25:05.720 --> 0:25:09.359 something's wrong with me. I got a weird laugh. Before long, 0:25:09.520 --> 0:25:14.720 he lost his confidence, he became insecure, started overcompensating. That's 0:25:14.760 --> 0:25:17.880 what happens when we don't shake things off. You may 0:25:17.920 --> 0:25:20.480 have something kind of distinct about you, but know this, 0:25:21.200 --> 0:25:24.680 God made you like you are on purpose. If people 0:25:24.680 --> 0:25:27.080 are trying to make fun of you or make you 0:25:27.119 --> 0:25:30.200 feel overly self conscious, you got to just shake that off. 0:25:31.200 --> 0:25:34.280 I know in my case, I smile a lot. In fact, 0:25:34.280 --> 0:25:37.040 I smile all the time. I can't help but I've 0:25:37.080 --> 0:25:39.320 been doing this since I was a little baby. One time, 0:25:39.359 --> 0:25:40.840 when I was seven years old, I was in a 0:25:40.840 --> 0:25:43.000 car accident and I had this big cut on my 0:25:43.080 --> 0:25:46.200 head and some friends came up to the emergency room 0:25:46.240 --> 0:25:48.439 to see me. They were so worried that I'd be 0:25:48.520 --> 0:25:51.359 upset and crying when they came in. I was laying 0:25:51.400 --> 0:25:53.800 there on the emergency room table, and they said, Joel, 0:25:53.800 --> 0:25:55.800 we walked in there, and you were smiling from ear 0:25:55.840 --> 0:25:58.240 to ear, big old cut on my head. That's just 0:25:58.280 --> 0:26:01.879 the way God made me. And sometimes people kind of 0:26:01.880 --> 0:26:04.480 make fun of me for smiling, give me a hard time. 0:26:04.840 --> 0:26:08.199 You'd think they'd be happy that you're happy, but you know, 0:26:08.240 --> 0:26:11.800 I've heard people say I've heard people say, why does 0:26:11.840 --> 0:26:14.840 he smile so much? Almost like there's something wrong with him, 0:26:14.880 --> 0:26:18.600 you know. You know, after my father went to be 0:26:18.640 --> 0:26:21.760 with the Lord, a few months after I began ministering, 0:26:22.200 --> 0:26:25.480 somebody started calling me the Smiling Preacher, and it really 0:26:25.480 --> 0:26:28.040 caught on. And one day has been interviewed by this 0:26:28.440 --> 0:26:31.280 very well known reporter and he said, kind of sarcastically, 0:26:31.359 --> 0:26:33.560 kind of demeaning, what do you think about being known 0:26:33.560 --> 0:26:36.520 as the smiling Preacher? And I think my answer kind 0:26:36.560 --> 0:26:38.520 of surprised him because I said, you know what, I 0:26:38.640 --> 0:26:41.560 kind of like it. I'm happy. I believe God wants 0:26:41.600 --> 0:26:43.719 us to be happy, so that's just fine with me. Now. 0:26:43.720 --> 0:26:47.160 I'll never forget his jaw drop wide open. He didn't 0:26:47.200 --> 0:26:50.639 know what to think. But see, we should not allow 0:26:50.720 --> 0:26:53.919 what other people say or what other people think change 0:26:54.000 --> 0:26:55.960 us from being who God made us to be. Be 0:26:56.160 --> 0:26:59.159 confident in who you are. Now I've learned to just 0:26:59.280 --> 0:27:01.840 roll with the punch. The other day, I saw this 0:27:01.960 --> 0:27:05.439 parody that somebody made about me. It was a clip 0:27:05.440 --> 0:27:08.600 of me speaking, and every time I smiled, my front 0:27:08.640 --> 0:27:11.800 teeth would ping. This star would come off kind of 0:27:11.840 --> 0:27:16.040 like a toothpaste commercial. I laughed more than the people 0:27:16.080 --> 0:27:19.359 that were watching it with me, But I thought to myself, 0:27:19.560 --> 0:27:22.760 that doesn't bother me one bit. I can't help it. 0:27:22.840 --> 0:27:25.720 I know I smile a lot. If somebody doesn't like it, 0:27:30.280 --> 0:27:39.240 take a look at the slow motion replay. Oh y, 0:27:40.640 --> 0:27:42.639 I'm gonna see if I can't get Crest to sponsor 0:27:42.720 --> 0:27:48.480 this program. Well, what I'm saying is one you ought 0:27:48.520 --> 0:27:50.280 to be able to laugh at yourself. The other thing, 0:27:50.800 --> 0:27:54.840 don't let the criticism change you. Start shaking stuff off. 0:27:54.840 --> 0:27:57.920 You're gonna do anything great in life. You're gonna have 0:27:58.160 --> 0:28:01.040 the critics. The slingers will all always be there, But 0:28:01.119 --> 0:28:03.480 I'm asking you today not to drink of their poison 0:28:04.000 --> 0:28:06.320 when those stones come. Make sure you got to live 0:28:06.359 --> 0:28:10.560 on your well, keep your heart pure. Remember not everybody's 0:28:10.560 --> 0:28:13.320 gonna understand you, Not everybody's gonna accept you. Just run 0:28:13.359 --> 0:28:16.240 your race, stay focused on what God's called you to do. 0:28:16.840 --> 0:28:19.720 If you'll handle criticism the right way, not let it 0:28:19.760 --> 0:28:22.239 get on the inside. I know this, God will not 0:28:22.280 --> 0:28:24.600 only fight your battles for you, but he'll take care 0:28:24.640 --> 0:28:26.919 of your critics for you. You'll live that life of 0:28:27.000 --> 0:28:30.639 victory he has in story. Amen, we never like to 0:28:30.680 --> 0:28:34.080 close our broadcast without giving you an opportunity to make 0:28:34.200 --> 0:28:37.119 Jesus the lord of your life. Would you pray with me? 0:28:37.680 --> 0:28:42.960 Just say, Lord Jesus, I repent of my sins. Come 0:28:43.000 --> 0:28:46.440 into my heart. I make you my Lord and savior. 0:28:47.760 --> 0:28:50.000 If you prayed that simple prayer, we believe you got 0:28:50.000 --> 0:28:53.040 born again. Get in a good Bible based church. God's 0:28:53.080 --> 0:28:55.880 going to take your places you've never dreamed out. Thank 0:28:55.920 --> 0:28:59.280 you for listening to the Juelus Dean podcast. Help us 0:28:59.320 --> 0:29:01.920 continue to sh share the message of hope with those 0:29:02.000 --> 0:29:04.840 all over the world. Visit joelostein dot. 0:29:04.640 --> 0:29:07.680 Com slash give Hope to give a gift today. 0:29:08.960 --> 0:29:11.880 Thanks so much for listening to today's message. I hope 0:29:11.880 --> 0:29:15.240 you'll subscribe so you can receive the latest podcast to 0:29:15.320 --> 0:29:18.520 keep you inspired all through the week. We're praying for you. 0:29:18.720 --> 0:29:21.160 I know God's best is still ahead. We'll see you 0:29:21.240 --> 0:29:21.720 next time.