Having A Kind, Gentle Spirit

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What if 0:01:08.520 --> 0:01:11.080 you could unlock insights about your finances in less than 0:01:11.120 --> 0:01:13.600 five minutes with a clear picture of where you stand 0:01:13.600 --> 0:01:16.399 today and where your money can work harder. Now you 0:01:16.520 --> 0:01:19.480 can visit facet dot com to take the free quiz 0:01:19.520 --> 0:01:23.280 and get your financial wellness score today. That's face t 0:01:23.600 --> 0:01:25.679 dot com. This add a sponsored by Facet. Facet Wealth 0:01:25.720 --> 0:01:27.840 in Corporated is an sec registered investment advisor. This is 0:01:27.840 --> 0:01:29.800 not an offer to buy yourself securities, nor is it investment, 0:01:29.880 --> 0:01:30.759 legal or tax advice. 0:01:31.280 --> 0:01:34.000 Hi, this is Joel and Victoria. Thanks for listening to 0:01:34.080 --> 0:01:37.160 our podcast and thanks for supporting the ministry. If you 0:01:37.280 --> 0:01:39.840 enjoy today's message, why don't you be a blessing and 0:01:39.959 --> 0:01:42.560 share it with a friend. We appreciate you and pray 0:01:42.600 --> 0:01:44.440 put God's very best in your life. 0:01:55.920 --> 0:01:59.520 God bless you were welcome here, always a joy to 0:01:59.600 --> 0:02:01.800 come in ther homes each week, and thank you for 0:02:01.920 --> 0:02:04.360 letting us spend this next half hour or so with you, 0:02:04.560 --> 0:02:07.120 and we believe that you'll be blessed and encouraged. 0:02:07.280 --> 0:02:08.920 I can tell you that God is on your side. 0:02:08.960 --> 0:02:11.160 He's got a good plan for your life, and when 0:02:11.200 --> 0:02:13.160 you serve him, He'll take you places that you've never 0:02:13.240 --> 0:02:15.280 even dreamed of. And if you're ever in our area, 0:02:15.520 --> 0:02:17.800 come out and see us. We give you a personal invitation. 0:02:17.919 --> 0:02:19.680 We'd love to have you be a part of one 0:02:19.760 --> 0:02:22.200 of our services. Thanks for tuning in today. And I 0:02:22.400 --> 0:02:24.400 like to get started each week with something kind of funny. 0:02:24.440 --> 0:02:27.440 And I heard about this elderly lady. She came in 0:02:27.919 --> 0:02:30.160 to the back of a country church one Sunday morning, 0:02:30.240 --> 0:02:32.959 and this friendly usher greeted her and said, good morning, ma'am. 0:02:33.200 --> 0:02:35.600 Where would you like to sit? She said, I want 0:02:35.639 --> 0:02:38.440 to sit on the very front row. He said, oh, no, ma'am, 0:02:38.480 --> 0:02:40.040 you don't want to do that, and he kind of whispered. 0:02:40.080 --> 0:02:43.480 He said, this pastor is very boring. He'll put you asleep. 0:02:43.600 --> 0:02:47.079 Let me seek you somewhere else. She looked appalled. She said, sir, 0:02:47.560 --> 0:02:50.600 do you know who I am? He said no. She said, 0:02:50.639 --> 0:02:55.160 I am the pastor's mother. He put his head down 0:02:55.200 --> 0:02:57.000 and kind of grimaced, and finally he looked up and 0:02:57.040 --> 0:02:59.359 he said, ma'am, do you know who I am? She 0:02:59.480 --> 0:03:05.480 said no. He said, thank God, all right, hold up 0:03:05.520 --> 0:03:07.840 your bibles and say it with me. Ready, this is 0:03:08.000 --> 0:03:11.160 my Bible. I am what it says I am. I 0:03:11.360 --> 0:03:13.799 have what it says I have. I can do what 0:03:13.960 --> 0:03:16.760 it says I can do. Today I will be taught 0:03:16.800 --> 0:03:21.240 the word of God. I boldly confess my mind is alert, 0:03:21.760 --> 0:03:24.919 my heart is receptive. I will never be the same. 0:03:25.520 --> 0:03:29.760 In Jesus' name, God bless you. I want to talk 0:03:29.840 --> 0:03:33.480 to you about being kind and courteous and treating people 0:03:33.560 --> 0:03:37.680 with respect. I believe how we treat people is one 0:03:37.680 --> 0:03:40.840 of the most important things to God. In fact, you 0:03:40.960 --> 0:03:44.720 can measure a person's spiritual maturity not by how many 0:03:44.760 --> 0:03:47.320 scriptures they can quote, not by how many times they 0:03:47.400 --> 0:03:52.040 come to church. And although that's good, religious activity doesn't 0:03:52.120 --> 0:03:56.040 necessarily impress God. It's how we treat other people. In 0:03:56.160 --> 0:04:00.160 other words, am I being respectful to my wife, my 0:04:00.360 --> 0:04:03.320 kind to my children, and my courteous to the man 0:04:03.400 --> 0:04:06.080 on the freeway, and my friendly to the lady at 0:04:06.120 --> 0:04:09.560 the grocery store. Really it boils down to this, do 0:04:09.720 --> 0:04:14.360 I have a gentle, caring spirit? And unfortunately much of 0:04:14.440 --> 0:04:17.840 our society is not like this Today. Too many people 0:04:17.960 --> 0:04:22.240 are rude, They're harsh and insensitive. They'll blow right by 0:04:22.360 --> 0:04:24.800 you and not give you the time of day. They'll 0:04:24.880 --> 0:04:28.080 demand things from your bark orders at you instead of 0:04:28.160 --> 0:04:32.720 politely asking, I mean, where has common courtesy gone? Where 0:04:32.839 --> 0:04:35.880 has been understanding? And going out of our way to 0:04:36.000 --> 0:04:38.960 show our love gone? And the scripture says here in 0:04:39.040 --> 0:04:42.960 one Corinthians thirteen, verse five that love is not rude. 0:04:43.720 --> 0:04:47.680 One translation says love has good manners. Now I want 0:04:47.680 --> 0:04:51.520 to challenge you today to develop a greater gentleness, a 0:04:51.640 --> 0:04:56.479 greater kindness, a greater understanding. You may not agree with everybody. 0:04:56.960 --> 0:04:59.120 They may do some things that you don't like, but 0:04:59.240 --> 0:05:01.760 that doesn't give you the right to be rude. Doesn't 0:05:01.760 --> 0:05:03.920 give us the right to look down on people and 0:05:04.040 --> 0:05:07.039 treat them as if they were second class. Now, Jesus 0:05:07.120 --> 0:05:10.640 said by this, well, all men know that you're my disciples. 0:05:11.080 --> 0:05:14.599 When you love one another, there should be something different 0:05:14.680 --> 0:05:18.479 about us. We should be the kindest, most friendly, most 0:05:18.560 --> 0:05:21.520 considerate people around. That's one of the best witnesses we 0:05:21.600 --> 0:05:24.359 could ever have. And if this is going to happen, 0:05:24.839 --> 0:05:27.360 then we need to watch the way we say things. 0:05:27.960 --> 0:05:31.760 Be aware of your body language. I read where communication 0:05:32.440 --> 0:05:37.200 is sixty percent nonverbal. In other words, your body language, 0:05:37.680 --> 0:05:41.240 your facial expressions, the tone of your voice. All of 0:05:41.320 --> 0:05:44.960 these things are communicating even more than what we're saying, 0:05:45.800 --> 0:05:47.640 and that means we need to learn to keep a 0:05:47.720 --> 0:05:50.960 pleasant demeanor. We need to learn to smile more often, 0:05:51.680 --> 0:05:54.520 and when you're under pressure. When you're under stress, you 0:05:54.640 --> 0:05:58.280 need to especially be on guard, be sensitive, and do 0:05:58.440 --> 0:06:02.120 your best not to hurt of the people's feelings. Too often, 0:06:02.200 --> 0:06:04.560 we just blow in and we say something very matter 0:06:04.720 --> 0:06:07.440 of a fact, and we don't realize it, but it's 0:06:07.520 --> 0:06:09.760 not coming out like we want it to. It's coming 0:06:09.800 --> 0:06:12.680 out much more harsh, and that could all be avoided 0:06:12.880 --> 0:06:15.080 if we just be a little more sensitive and a 0:06:15.120 --> 0:06:18.600 little more tactful in how we say things. I know 0:06:18.720 --> 0:06:21.400 the other day I came home and I was very tired. 0:06:21.560 --> 0:06:24.640 I'd had a long day. Victoria asked me a question 0:06:25.240 --> 0:06:27.320 and I did just what I'm talking about. I just 0:06:27.400 --> 0:06:30.360 blurted out the answer, very matter of fact. I didn't 0:06:30.400 --> 0:06:33.080 say anything wrong. I wasn't trying to be rude, but 0:06:33.240 --> 0:06:36.640 my whole demeanor, my body language, the tone of my 0:06:36.800 --> 0:06:40.000 voice was basically saying, Hey, don't bother me. Can't you 0:06:40.080 --> 0:06:43.080 see I'm tired. I want to be by myself now. 0:06:43.200 --> 0:06:45.040 Quit looking at me like I'm a sinner. I made 0:06:45.080 --> 0:06:49.360 one mistake, how about I give you the microphone. We're 0:06:49.360 --> 0:06:52.800 gona see what you did wrong this way. But after 0:06:52.880 --> 0:06:56.200 about two hours, when I noticed that Victoria wasn't speaking 0:06:56.279 --> 0:07:00.719 to me, I realized maybe I'd been a little sensitive. 0:07:00.960 --> 0:07:02.799 And now, of course I've pled my case. I said, Victoria, 0:07:02.800 --> 0:07:05.160 I didn't say anything wrong. She said, yeah, but you 0:07:05.240 --> 0:07:07.560 should have heard how you said it. See, it was 0:07:07.640 --> 0:07:10.560 my voice, tones, it was my demeanor, And that's what happens. 0:07:10.680 --> 0:07:14.120 Many times. We may be saying the right thing, but 0:07:14.320 --> 0:07:18.160 how we say it is equally important. Be sensitive and 0:07:18.320 --> 0:07:21.480 learn to say things in a pleasant tone of voice. Well, 0:07:21.520 --> 0:07:24.200 you say, Joe, my personality is just a little bit stronger. 0:07:24.680 --> 0:07:27.120 I'm just real straightforward. I believe in telling it like 0:07:27.200 --> 0:07:30.640 it is. No, do not let your personality be an 0:07:30.720 --> 0:07:34.320 excuse to be rude. You can be truthful, but you 0:07:34.440 --> 0:07:38.920 can You can be truthful, but you can be tactful 0:07:39.040 --> 0:07:42.320 as well. You need to watch the way you say things. 0:07:42.800 --> 0:07:44.760 You need to make sure you even need to say it. 0:07:45.040 --> 0:07:46.800 A lot of times we say things just to make 0:07:46.920 --> 0:07:49.640 us feel good. You may know you're right and you 0:07:49.800 --> 0:07:52.280 know the other person's wrong, but that doesn't mean that 0:07:52.360 --> 0:07:55.080 you have to correct them. You need to ask yourself, 0:07:55.320 --> 0:07:58.200 is this going to benefit anybody? Is this really necessary? 0:07:58.800 --> 0:08:00.680 Are you just doing it to prove your point to 0:08:00.760 --> 0:08:04.000 make yourself feel good. Now, when you go around putting 0:08:04.040 --> 0:08:07.720 people down, being harsh, being rude, you will always walk 0:08:07.760 --> 0:08:11.160 away from there feeling worse about yourself. Right down in here, 0:08:11.400 --> 0:08:13.880 you'll have that nagging feeling just gnawing away at you. 0:08:14.160 --> 0:08:16.160 You'd been much better off to just leave it alone. 0:08:16.760 --> 0:08:18.400 And you may have a good reason to jump in 0:08:18.520 --> 0:08:21.880 there and set the record straight. But understand this, if 0:08:21.960 --> 0:08:26.120 you're right and you're rude, then you're wrong. It's all 0:08:26.200 --> 0:08:30.000 in how you present it. Proverbs eleven seventeen says you 0:08:30.200 --> 0:08:34.320 do yourself a favor when you're kind. Notice you don't 0:08:34.400 --> 0:08:36.679 just do somebody else a favor when you're good to them. 0:08:37.240 --> 0:08:40.280 But when you show a little mercy, when you overlook 0:08:40.320 --> 0:08:43.200 a fault, when you have that gentle spirit, you're doing 0:08:43.280 --> 0:08:46.640 yourself a favor. I know one time years ago, I 0:08:46.760 --> 0:08:49.439 was at this restaurant and when it came time to pay, 0:08:49.559 --> 0:08:52.200 all I had was a one hundred dollars bill. There 0:08:52.280 --> 0:08:55.439 was a sign up front that said no bills over twenty. Well, 0:08:55.520 --> 0:08:57.000 I didn't see it at the time. And so when 0:08:57.040 --> 0:08:58.920 I went up there to pay, you would have thought 0:08:59.040 --> 0:09:02.040 I just put the company out of business. The lady 0:09:02.120 --> 0:09:04.559 behind the cash register was so rude. She said, sir, 0:09:04.760 --> 0:09:07.640 can't you see no bill's over twenty. I said, I'm sorry, ma'am, 0:09:07.679 --> 0:09:10.240 I didn't see it. She called the manager over, and 0:09:10.360 --> 0:09:12.120 I'll never forget. He looked at that one hundred dollar 0:09:12.200 --> 0:09:16.280 bill and he went, give it here, I'll take it. No, 0:09:16.520 --> 0:09:20.439 we need to be more understanding than that. When somebody 0:09:20.559 --> 0:09:23.800 puts you out, when somebody inconveniences you, you need to 0:09:23.800 --> 0:09:26.599 ask yourself, hey, have I ever put anybody out? Have 0:09:26.760 --> 0:09:29.440 I ever made a mistake? If you'll learn to show 0:09:29.480 --> 0:09:32.800 a little mercy, then you'll receive mercy. Even out here 0:09:32.880 --> 0:09:36.199 on the freeways. It's amazing how impolite people can be. 0:09:36.600 --> 0:09:39.319 A couple of weeks ago, I saw two guys almost 0:09:39.400 --> 0:09:42.079 get into a fight because one man turned from the 0:09:42.160 --> 0:09:44.559 wrong lane and this other man got right up on 0:09:44.640 --> 0:09:47.200 his bumper and he was telling him, honking his horn, 0:09:47.280 --> 0:09:50.480 shaking his fists. So upset I wanted to ask him, hey, 0:09:50.840 --> 0:09:53.000 have you ever made a wrong turn? Have you ever 0:09:53.040 --> 0:09:56.280 cut anybody off? He looked bigger than me, so I didn't, 0:09:58.200 --> 0:10:01.079 but we got learned to give people a little so 0:10:01.280 --> 0:10:05.199 a little mercy. It's funny. Sometimes somebody will jump in 0:10:05.280 --> 0:10:07.160 front of us in traffic and we'll want to honk 0:10:07.280 --> 0:10:09.960 and get upset, and then just a few minutes later, 0:10:10.280 --> 0:10:14.679 we'll cross four lanes of traffic to exit half of Houston, 0:10:14.720 --> 0:10:17.439 will be honking and we'll be thinking, come on, people, 0:10:17.480 --> 0:10:19.240 give me a break. I'm on a human. 0:10:20.480 --> 0:10:20.560 Now. 0:10:20.720 --> 0:10:22.880 Learn to sew a little mercy, be a little kind, 0:10:23.000 --> 0:10:26.040 or have that gentle spirit. And we should never do 0:10:26.320 --> 0:10:29.880 things or say things to be little a person. Never 0:10:30.040 --> 0:10:33.680 make a person feel unimportant. For instance, maybe you're trying 0:10:33.679 --> 0:10:36.440 to explain something to somebody and they just can't seem 0:10:36.520 --> 0:10:39.480 to catch on. Well, don't get all huffy and puffy 0:10:39.559 --> 0:10:42.920 and try to make them feel like a loser. Be understanding. 0:10:43.520 --> 0:10:46.160 God has given us all different gifts, and there are 0:10:46.240 --> 0:10:48.719 areas that you can pick up on very quickly. It's 0:10:48.720 --> 0:10:50.520 gonna take me a lot longer, and just the other 0:10:50.600 --> 0:10:54.359 way around. We need to be understanding, keep the right attitude. 0:10:54.760 --> 0:10:57.080 I know people that are always trying to be little 0:10:57.080 --> 0:11:00.200 to somebody. Really the problem is they're so insecure. Sure 0:11:00.520 --> 0:11:02.840 they do anything they can to put somebody else down. 0:11:03.600 --> 0:11:07.000 Don't fall into that trap. The Bible says love covers 0:11:07.080 --> 0:11:12.080 a fault, love covers a weakness, and love never embarrasses anybody. 0:11:12.760 --> 0:11:15.640 If somebody ask a dumb question in a business meeting, 0:11:15.679 --> 0:11:18.360 a dumb question at school, you should do your best 0:11:18.400 --> 0:11:21.200 to smooth it over, cover for him, don't embarrass him. 0:11:21.920 --> 0:11:24.160 Or maybe you're up at that checkout counter and the 0:11:24.240 --> 0:11:26.679 clerk that's running that cash register can't seem to get 0:11:26.720 --> 0:11:29.720 anything right. Maybe he's new. Well, I don't just stand 0:11:29.800 --> 0:11:31.760 right there and breathe down his throat and tap on 0:11:31.840 --> 0:11:34.480 the counter. Come on, buddy, no, give him a little 0:11:34.520 --> 0:11:37.120 bit of slack. Say hey, you know what, take your time, 0:11:37.320 --> 0:11:40.240 it's okay. See what I'm saying is, learn to sew 0:11:40.320 --> 0:11:43.199 a little mercy. After all, we've all been in those 0:11:43.240 --> 0:11:46.160 situations before. I'm sure I'm not the only one that's 0:11:46.160 --> 0:11:49.000 ever asked a dumb question before. We've all had times 0:11:49.080 --> 0:11:52.400 where we need a little mercy, we need a little understanding. 0:11:52.880 --> 0:11:55.280 The other day, when we opened up this building, they 0:11:55.320 --> 0:11:57.360 gave me a key to get in back here where 0:11:57.400 --> 0:11:59.880 we park and it was this real odd looking key. 0:12:00.000 --> 0:12:02.360 It was kind of oblong, and I'd never seen anything 0:12:02.480 --> 0:12:04.880 like this before, and so I came down one day 0:12:04.960 --> 0:12:07.679 during the week and I tried and tried to figure 0:12:07.679 --> 0:12:09.800 out how this key is supposed to work, and I 0:12:09.920 --> 0:12:12.319 had it jiggling around the doorknob, and I don't know. 0:12:12.360 --> 0:12:14.400 I thought maybe something was gonna pop out, but I 0:12:14.520 --> 0:12:16.559 just couldn't get it to work. And so finally I 0:12:16.640 --> 0:12:18.720 had to go get the security guard and I told 0:12:18.800 --> 0:12:20.439 him what I'd been doing. He said, well, let me 0:12:20.559 --> 0:12:22.640 just go show you. So we came back over to 0:12:22.679 --> 0:12:24.959 the back door and he took my key and he 0:12:25.080 --> 0:12:27.000 put it over to the right of the door on 0:12:27.080 --> 0:12:30.400 this electronic keypad, and when he touched that, then the 0:12:30.480 --> 0:12:34.599 door just electronically opened. And when he realized what I 0:12:34.679 --> 0:12:37.600 had been doing, trying to put that key in the doorknob, 0:12:38.000 --> 0:12:42.520 he began to laugh and laugh, and then I started laughing, 0:12:42.800 --> 0:12:47.320 but man, he could not quit laughing. And after a while, 0:12:47.480 --> 0:12:49.719 I thought, I'm glad you're enjoying this, because we're sure 0:12:49.760 --> 0:12:58.280 gonna miss you. But you should do your best and 0:12:58.400 --> 0:13:02.680 never make anybody if kiel small. I felt about that big. 0:13:03.960 --> 0:13:07.000 And when somebody does something foolish, when somebody makes a mistake, 0:13:07.920 --> 0:13:10.640 just remember with the same amount of mercy you show, 0:13:10.960 --> 0:13:13.160 that's the same amount of mercy you're going to receive. 0:13:13.720 --> 0:13:17.160 And we need to learn to be understanding. If something 0:13:17.280 --> 0:13:19.839 is not right, there's a way to correct it without 0:13:19.920 --> 0:13:22.760 being rude and getting all upset. I was at a 0:13:22.840 --> 0:13:25.040 fast food restaurant one time and this guy was up 0:13:25.080 --> 0:13:27.200 at the counter and he was just having a fit. 0:13:27.320 --> 0:13:29.679 He was so upset. He said, listen here, I've been 0:13:29.720 --> 0:13:32.400 here for ten minutes and I've watched three people leave 0:13:32.480 --> 0:13:34.439 that were behind me in line, and I demand to 0:13:34.520 --> 0:13:37.199 know what's wrong. On and on he went, giving them 0:13:37.240 --> 0:13:40.600 an ear form, just making a big sine. No. Remember, 0:13:41.040 --> 0:13:43.920 you may be right, but if you're rude, then you're wrong. 0:13:44.559 --> 0:13:47.400 You need to learn to lower your voice tones, ask 0:13:47.480 --> 0:13:51.000 in a respectful way. I found people will do more 0:13:51.040 --> 0:13:53.600 for you if you're kind and courteous than if you're 0:13:53.640 --> 0:13:58.600 rude and obnoxious. Politeness wins people over, not rudeness. Need 0:13:58.679 --> 0:14:02.199 to learn to be understand, not demanding. It's like that 0:14:02.320 --> 0:14:05.120 guy heard about. He was up at the airline ticket counter, 0:14:05.559 --> 0:14:09.079 ranning and raving to the ticket agent, complaining about why 0:14:09.160 --> 0:14:11.559 it's taken so long, complaining about why she couldn't go 0:14:11.640 --> 0:14:14.679 any faster, and as he continued to just holler and 0:14:14.760 --> 0:14:17.839 scream and throw a big fit, this ticket agent was 0:14:17.960 --> 0:14:20.840 just as calm and courteous and polite as she possibly 0:14:20.880 --> 0:14:23.640 could be. Didn't even look like it bothered her. Well, 0:14:23.640 --> 0:14:25.280 he went on his way, and the next guy in 0:14:25.360 --> 0:14:27.640 line came up and he said, ma'am, I gotta tell you, 0:14:27.720 --> 0:14:29.960 I am so impressed. You must be a good Christian. 0:14:30.200 --> 0:14:33.160 That guy was so obnoxious, yet you were so polite 0:14:33.200 --> 0:14:35.120 to him. I don't know how you did it. She 0:14:35.280 --> 0:14:37.440 smiled and said, well, it wasn't that hard. See he's 0:14:37.480 --> 0:14:44.520 going to Detroit, but his bags are going to Bangkok. Friends. 0:14:44.640 --> 0:14:50.760 People respond to politeness, not rudeness. Proverbs sixteen twenty one 0:14:50.880 --> 0:14:56.040 says a mature person is known for his understanding. The 0:14:56.160 --> 0:15:00.840 more pleasant his words, the more persuasive he is. Notice, 0:15:00.920 --> 0:15:03.760 if you want to be more persuasive in your business meetings, 0:15:03.880 --> 0:15:07.560 more persuasive with your clients, don't get loud, don't be 0:15:07.680 --> 0:15:12.800 critical towards your competitors, Be pleasant, be courteous, be respectful. 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:16.240 You want to be more persuasive with your husband, more 0:15:16.320 --> 0:15:19.360 persuasive with your children, more persuasive with the waiter at 0:15:19.400 --> 0:15:22.400 the restaurant. The whole key is in the tone of 0:15:22.440 --> 0:15:25.160 your voice, it's in our demeanor, it's in our attitude. 0:15:25.240 --> 0:15:29.640 We've got to learn to be friendly, respectful, considerate. Please understand, 0:15:30.000 --> 0:15:33.800 you are never persuasive when you're route. We're never persuasive 0:15:33.840 --> 0:15:36.560 when we're loud and obnoxious. You've got to make sure 0:15:36.640 --> 0:15:40.760 that your words are pleasant. It's politeness that changes people. 0:15:41.240 --> 0:15:46.120 It's being respectful, it's being understanding. I heard somebody say 0:15:46.480 --> 0:15:49.640 you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar. 0:15:50.320 --> 0:15:52.840 If you go around cyur all the time, spout in 0:15:52.880 --> 0:15:55.840 your opinion, trying to straighten everybody else out, not only 0:15:56.000 --> 0:15:57.960 are you not going to be a very good witness, 0:15:58.080 --> 0:16:00.360 but people are not going to respond to that. I 0:16:00.560 --> 0:16:04.400 found if you give respect, you'll get respect. If you're 0:16:04.440 --> 0:16:07.080 courteous to people, they'll be courteous to you. And if 0:16:07.120 --> 0:16:09.760 you will have this gentle spirit and go ahead and 0:16:09.880 --> 0:16:11.720 let the guy in front of you in traffic and 0:16:12.040 --> 0:16:14.520 stay at that door ten or fifteen seconds and hold 0:16:14.560 --> 0:16:17.080 it open for the people behind you. When you do that, 0:16:17.280 --> 0:16:19.360 God will make sure that people are always good to you. 0:16:20.280 --> 0:16:22.240 And we need to get in a habit of being 0:16:22.360 --> 0:16:26.240 kind and considerate to everyone, not just the people we're 0:16:26.280 --> 0:16:29.440 trying to impress, but even the people that can't do 0:16:29.600 --> 0:16:32.200 anything for us, even the people that are just passing 0:16:32.320 --> 0:16:35.520 through our lives. I believe this is really the test 0:16:35.640 --> 0:16:38.000 of our faith, because in a sense, we can all 0:16:38.080 --> 0:16:40.560 be nice and kind to our friends and to our 0:16:40.640 --> 0:16:43.920 coworkers because we want to keep a good reputation. But 0:16:44.040 --> 0:16:46.160 how about that man on the freeway that wants to 0:16:46.200 --> 0:16:48.520 get in front of you, or how about that lady 0:16:48.600 --> 0:16:51.160 that calls during dinner time trying to sell you something 0:16:51.320 --> 0:16:54.720 that you're not interested in. In other words, the people 0:16:54.800 --> 0:16:58.000 that can't do anything for us will probably never meet them. 0:16:58.480 --> 0:17:01.520 Nobody's watching, nobody's to give us any credit, And the 0:17:01.600 --> 0:17:03.680 easy thing is to just blow them off and say, hey, 0:17:03.720 --> 0:17:06.320 you know what kind of stay away from me. No, 0:17:06.440 --> 0:17:10.000 I'm challenging you today to develop a habit of being friendly. 0:17:10.560 --> 0:17:13.480 Make an effort to smile at people, take time to 0:17:13.640 --> 0:17:16.600 compliment them, take time to hold the door open for them. 0:17:17.160 --> 0:17:19.200 Don't be in such a rush in life, in such 0:17:19.240 --> 0:17:22.600 a hurry, that you miss these opportunities to sow seeds 0:17:22.640 --> 0:17:26.399 of kindness. We should be considerate everywhere we go, and 0:17:26.520 --> 0:17:28.760 we need to make sure that we never feel like 0:17:28.880 --> 0:17:32.800 we're too important or too busy to say please and 0:17:33.000 --> 0:17:37.840 thank you. Learn to express your appreciation. Even if you're 0:17:37.920 --> 0:17:40.640 paying somebody to do something for you, even if they're 0:17:40.680 --> 0:17:43.480 one of your employees, that doesn't mean you don't have 0:17:43.600 --> 0:17:45.760 to thank them. That doesn't mean you can just take 0:17:45.840 --> 0:17:48.920 them for granted. I've had people say, Joe, I pay 0:17:49.000 --> 0:17:51.560 them good, they better work hard. The no have you 0:17:51.640 --> 0:17:55.040 ever thought about that person is made in the image 0:17:55.080 --> 0:17:58.719 of Almighty God. He's got feelings, she's got feelings. They 0:17:58.800 --> 0:18:03.000 need encouragement, they needed your approval. Take time to thank them, 0:18:03.080 --> 0:18:05.520 be grateful, Say hey, I appreciate all you do for us. 0:18:05.640 --> 0:18:05.920 Thank you. 0:18:06.800 --> 0:18:10.200 See, just because we may be over somebody, just because 0:18:10.240 --> 0:18:12.720 you may be in management, that doesn't give us the 0:18:12.840 --> 0:18:15.600 right to treat people under us like their second class. 0:18:16.240 --> 0:18:18.320 In fact, God is going to hold us to a 0:18:18.440 --> 0:18:22.000 higher standard. To whom much is given, much is required. 0:18:22.640 --> 0:18:25.680 And the truth is the more authority we have, the 0:18:25.800 --> 0:18:28.840 more humility we should walk in. And the fact is 0:18:28.960 --> 0:18:31.040 the same God that brought us up can be the 0:18:31.119 --> 0:18:33.720 same God that'll bring us down. And one thing that 0:18:33.800 --> 0:18:37.600 God will never tolerate is that someone that abuses their 0:18:37.640 --> 0:18:41.440 position of authority. If you're in leadership today and you 0:18:41.520 --> 0:18:43.640 want to stay in leadership, you need to make sure 0:18:43.720 --> 0:18:46.960 you treat people right. It's funny. I've seen people they're 0:18:47.000 --> 0:18:49.880 so nice and kind, but you give them a little 0:18:49.920 --> 0:18:52.000 bit of power, they get a little authority, and all 0:18:52.000 --> 0:18:54.359 of a sudden, it goes to their head. They start 0:18:54.400 --> 0:18:57.919 bossing people around, being rude, being harsh. That's never going 0:18:57.960 --> 0:19:01.919 to last. Now, treat your employees good, parents, treat your 0:19:02.080 --> 0:19:05.880 children good. If you're a coach or a teacher, treat 0:19:05.960 --> 0:19:10.560 those students respectfully. God's going to hold us responsible. And really, 0:19:10.760 --> 0:19:13.879 this all needs to start at home. The atmosphere of 0:19:13.960 --> 0:19:17.560 our homes should be peaceful, should be one of respect 0:19:17.680 --> 0:19:22.440 and honor husbands and wives. If we're saying disrespectful things 0:19:22.480 --> 0:19:25.720 to each other, all we're doing is teaching our children 0:19:26.040 --> 0:19:29.399 that it's okay to be disrespectful. If we're making cutting, 0:19:29.600 --> 0:19:33.000 sarcastic remarks, we can guarantee our children are going to 0:19:33.040 --> 0:19:36.320 grow up doing the exact same thing. See more is 0:19:36.480 --> 0:19:40.480 caught than taught. Your children are not going to necessarily 0:19:40.560 --> 0:19:42.720 do what you tell them to do. They're going to 0:19:42.800 --> 0:19:45.240 do what they see and what they hear you doing. 0:19:45.880 --> 0:19:47.920 You can tell them all day long be kind, treat 0:19:47.960 --> 0:19:52.440 people with respect. But if they see you being disrespectful 0:19:52.560 --> 0:19:55.480 to their mother, to their father, to another family member, 0:19:55.760 --> 0:19:57.720 you're giving them a green light to do it as well. 0:19:58.359 --> 0:20:00.159 Now there should be a sense of honor in our 0:20:00.240 --> 0:20:03.440 homes and parents. We should not go around barking orders 0:20:03.480 --> 0:20:07.320 at our kids hard and harsh. Clean your room, take 0:20:07.400 --> 0:20:10.040 the trash out. I told you, do your homework. No, 0:20:10.200 --> 0:20:13.119 be an example. Learn to say it in a loving 0:20:13.320 --> 0:20:16.040 and a kind way. And I believe that we should 0:20:16.040 --> 0:20:19.080 even get in a habit of saying please and thank 0:20:19.200 --> 0:20:22.600 you to our children. We're training them, and sure we 0:20:22.640 --> 0:20:24.919 can bossom around and bark orders at them and make 0:20:24.960 --> 0:20:27.520 it do it, but I believe it's much better to say, hey, Jonathan, 0:20:27.920 --> 0:20:30.639 please take the trash out for daddy. Alexandra, thank you 0:20:30.720 --> 0:20:33.480 for keeping the room so clean. See, there ought to 0:20:33.560 --> 0:20:37.760 be a gentleness about us. Be kind, be grateful. I 0:20:37.920 --> 0:20:41.240 know every time Victoria cooks dinner, I make a special 0:20:41.359 --> 0:20:43.680 point to thank her for it, and I know she 0:20:43.880 --> 0:20:45.920 knows it, but I want her to hear it again, 0:20:46.280 --> 0:20:49.920 and I especially want my children to hear me expressing 0:20:50.000 --> 0:20:55.600 my thanks and sometimes sometimes it's sad to see what 0:20:55.880 --> 0:20:59.280 really goes on behind closed doors. And as I said, 0:20:59.359 --> 0:21:01.480 we can all be nice and kind out in public. 0:21:01.600 --> 0:21:05.119 That's easy. But the real test of our character is 0:21:05.200 --> 0:21:07.439 how do we treat those that are closest to us. 0:21:07.880 --> 0:21:11.240 How do we treat our own family members. Sometimes we 0:21:11.359 --> 0:21:14.600 can end up treating somebody at the office better than 0:21:14.600 --> 0:21:17.840 we treat our own wife, our own husband, our own children. 0:21:18.320 --> 0:21:20.719 You know, we don't think twice about going to get 0:21:20.760 --> 0:21:22.440 a cup of coffee and bringing it back for a 0:21:22.520 --> 0:21:25.359 coworker doing them a favor. But if our own wife, 0:21:25.400 --> 0:21:27.600 our own husband ask us to do that, it seems 0:21:27.680 --> 0:21:30.840 like we get all put out. I've seen men they'll 0:21:30.880 --> 0:21:32.919 go out of their way to open up a car 0:21:33.080 --> 0:21:35.760 door for a business associate, but when it comes to 0:21:35.840 --> 0:21:38.800 his own wife, she's got a fend for herself. That's 0:21:38.880 --> 0:21:42.040 not right. We should treat our own family better than 0:21:42.119 --> 0:21:44.680 we treat anybody else. I mean, they're the ones we're 0:21:44.680 --> 0:21:48.000 going to grow old with. They're the ones that mean 0:21:48.119 --> 0:21:50.520 the most to us. And some of you need to 0:21:50.600 --> 0:21:54.200 examine your heart today and make some adjustments. Make sure 0:21:54.359 --> 0:21:57.159 that you're treating the ones very closest to you with 0:21:57.359 --> 0:22:01.280 respect and with honor. There's a scre that says a 0:22:01.440 --> 0:22:06.679 man's wife is a reflection of his glory. In other words, 0:22:06.960 --> 0:22:10.560 Victoria is a reflection of me, and how I treat 0:22:10.640 --> 0:22:14.760 her can be seen in her smile, in how she dresses, 0:22:15.200 --> 0:22:17.960 in her attitude, in the way she carries herself. She 0:22:18.119 --> 0:22:21.399 is a reflection of my glory. Now she's all beaten 0:22:21.520 --> 0:22:24.440 down and depressed, and she goes around discouraged all the time. 0:22:25.160 --> 0:22:27.240 Then me being her husband, I need to examine my 0:22:27.359 --> 0:22:30.159 own life and make sure that I'm not missing it somewhere. 0:22:30.760 --> 0:22:32.800 And I know some women that are just like this, 0:22:33.040 --> 0:22:36.440 so beaten down, and it's all because their husband is 0:22:36.600 --> 0:22:41.240 so domineering. He's not kind, he's not affectionate, there's no 0:22:41.400 --> 0:22:44.199 love in respecting the home. He's not putting into her 0:22:44.280 --> 0:22:47.240 what she needs. And year after year, that husband just 0:22:47.720 --> 0:22:50.480 drains the life and energy out of that wife. That 0:22:50.600 --> 0:22:53.120 should not be men. You need to look at your 0:22:53.200 --> 0:22:56.919 wife and see if she's reflecting the joy, the peace, 0:22:57.080 --> 0:23:00.239 the victory that God wants her to have. I used 0:23:00.240 --> 0:23:03.040 to play basketball with these guys, and after we got through, 0:23:03.280 --> 0:23:04.840 there was this one guy. He had always come up 0:23:04.880 --> 0:23:06.680 to me and he said, well, Joel, I got to 0:23:06.720 --> 0:23:10.320 go home and see my old lady. And I often thought, 0:23:10.720 --> 0:23:13.320 if you speak about your wife like that, you must 0:23:13.400 --> 0:23:15.840 not think too much of yourself, because she's a direct 0:23:15.920 --> 0:23:18.320 reflection of you. I don't know about you, men, but 0:23:18.400 --> 0:23:21.040 I want my wife to shine. I want Victoria to 0:23:21.119 --> 0:23:23.600 be happy, to feel good, to look good. She's a 0:23:23.680 --> 0:23:27.199 reflection of my character, of my goodness, of my glory. 0:23:27.480 --> 0:23:29.240 And know I'm not perfect, but I can tell you this. 0:23:29.800 --> 0:23:33.760 I respect my wife. I treat my children kindly. I 0:23:33.920 --> 0:23:36.560 do my best to treat my own family better than 0:23:36.560 --> 0:23:38.639 I treat anybody else. And that's the way that it 0:23:38.680 --> 0:23:43.680 should be. I heard somebody put it like this. At 0:23:43.720 --> 0:23:46.560 your house, you have these different dishes that you eat 0:23:46.600 --> 0:23:48.640 off of, and if you're in a hurry and you're 0:23:48.680 --> 0:23:50.920 out playing ball, out mowing the lawn, a lot of 0:23:51.000 --> 0:23:54.159 time you'll just grab some paper plates. They're quick and easy. 0:23:54.520 --> 0:23:56.640 When you're done, you just throw them away. You don't 0:23:56.640 --> 0:23:59.160 have to worry about them getting damaged. But then most 0:23:59.240 --> 0:24:02.040 of the time you're going to use your everyday plates 0:24:02.119 --> 0:24:04.600 and dishes, and you've got to be careful with them. 0:24:04.960 --> 0:24:07.520 But they're a lot more durable. They withstand a lot 0:24:07.600 --> 0:24:10.280 of wear and tear. But then every once in a while, 0:24:10.760 --> 0:24:13.359 on a special occasion, you'll go into your dining room 0:24:13.680 --> 0:24:17.120 and you'll take out your fine china. Now, these dishes 0:24:17.280 --> 0:24:20.720 are expensive. You've got to handle them with care. You 0:24:20.760 --> 0:24:23.240 don't just toss them around and treat them anyway you want. 0:24:23.480 --> 0:24:27.080 They're valuable. You'll go to great links to make sure 0:24:27.160 --> 0:24:29.840 that they're taken care of. And in a sense, that's 0:24:29.920 --> 0:24:32.639 the way it is in life. Some people we just 0:24:32.720 --> 0:24:35.879 see in passing. We need to be respectful and kind, 0:24:35.960 --> 0:24:38.719 but they're not in our lives very long. And then, 0:24:38.800 --> 0:24:40.520 of course we have our group of friends, we have 0:24:40.600 --> 0:24:43.520 our coworkers. We see them more on a regular basis, 0:24:43.920 --> 0:24:46.359 and again we need to treat them right. But when 0:24:46.440 --> 0:24:49.439 it comes to our own wife, our own husband, our 0:24:49.520 --> 0:24:53.399 own children, they're not the paper plates, they're not the 0:24:53.480 --> 0:24:57.119 everyday were These people are our fine china. They need 0:24:57.440 --> 0:25:00.840 special attention. We don't treat them like we treat everybody else. 0:25:00.960 --> 0:25:03.400 We go the extra mile. We got to make sure 0:25:03.480 --> 0:25:07.280 they feel loved, they feel respected, they feel secure. They 0:25:07.359 --> 0:25:11.000 need to know we care about them more than anybody else. 0:25:11.520 --> 0:25:13.560 And oh yes, we need to be kind and courteous 0:25:13.800 --> 0:25:16.640 to everyone. But these people are the ones that God 0:25:16.760 --> 0:25:19.840 has entrusted us with. And I would challenge you again 0:25:19.920 --> 0:25:22.840 today to make sure you're not showing your boss, or 0:25:22.920 --> 0:25:26.800 your neighbor, or your friends more respect then you're showing 0:25:26.920 --> 0:25:30.520 your own family. You've got fine China. They need that 0:25:30.640 --> 0:25:33.200 special care. They need to know more than anybody else, 0:25:33.440 --> 0:25:36.280 you're concerned about them. And I want us to have 0:25:36.520 --> 0:25:41.960 strong families, strong marriages, strong relationships here, and I know 0:25:42.440 --> 0:25:45.000 how much the enemy would love to tear us apart. 0:25:45.560 --> 0:25:48.520 And it starts so slyly. It starts with just a 0:25:48.640 --> 0:25:53.000 little disrespect, a little comment here and there, and then 0:25:53.040 --> 0:25:55.399 as time goes on, you don't think anything about it, 0:25:55.840 --> 0:25:58.560 you let your guard down, and then more and more 0:25:58.640 --> 0:26:01.520 disrespect comes, and before you know it, you're living in 0:26:01.600 --> 0:26:05.600 two separate worlds. No, take care of your family. Make 0:26:05.680 --> 0:26:09.360 sure that you're treating those the closest to you with respect, 0:26:09.520 --> 0:26:13.040 with love, better than you're treating anybody else. There's a 0:26:13.080 --> 0:26:16.040 scripture in one Peter three, verse seven. It says, men, 0:26:16.520 --> 0:26:19.400 if we are not considerate and kind to our wives, 0:26:19.760 --> 0:26:22.480 if we don't treat them with respect, then it's going 0:26:22.560 --> 0:26:26.240 to hinder our prayers from being answered. A good friend 0:26:26.280 --> 0:26:28.800 of mine told me something that happened to him. He 0:26:28.920 --> 0:26:31.720 and his wife tried for years to have a child. 0:26:32.280 --> 0:26:34.639 They were a young couple, but for some reason, she 0:26:34.800 --> 0:26:37.639 just couldn't conceive. And they prayed and prayed, did everything 0:26:37.720 --> 0:26:41.679 they can, but no child, and so they got so frustrated. 0:26:41.760 --> 0:26:44.639 Year after year went by, and one day he was 0:26:44.680 --> 0:26:48.160 on an airplane returning home from India and he began 0:26:48.280 --> 0:26:50.760 to ask God about it. He said, God, I don't 0:26:50.840 --> 0:26:53.560 understand it. Why can't we have a child. Why can't 0:26:53.600 --> 0:26:56.320 we have a baby. It's not fair. And he said 0:26:56.400 --> 0:26:59.240 that God spoke something back to him, not out loud, 0:26:59.280 --> 0:27:02.240 but write down in here. God said, son, you're not 0:27:02.280 --> 0:27:05.440 gonna have a child until you start treating your wife better. 0:27:06.320 --> 0:27:08.720 And you got to understand. This young man was a minister, 0:27:09.320 --> 0:27:12.040 He was a good person, he loved God. But he 0:27:12.240 --> 0:27:15.119 was not treating his wife the way he knew he should. 0:27:15.520 --> 0:27:19.879 He was making sarcastic comments, being disrespectful, being hard to 0:27:19.920 --> 0:27:22.639 get along with. He said, when he heard those words, 0:27:22.680 --> 0:27:26.040 it just pierced his heart. The good news is he 0:27:26.200 --> 0:27:30.439 was obedient. He didn't make excuses, he didn't blame other people. 0:27:30.800 --> 0:27:34.119 He began to make adjustments, and he started treating his 0:27:34.280 --> 0:27:37.280 wife better than he'd ever treated her before. He'd go 0:27:37.400 --> 0:27:39.919 out of his way to do special things for her, 0:27:40.320 --> 0:27:43.480 treating her loving and kind, being considerate. And do you 0:27:43.600 --> 0:27:47.360 know it wasn't six months time until his wife finally conceived. 0:27:47.720 --> 0:27:49.800 Just a little while after that, she gave birth to 0:27:49.880 --> 0:27:52.680 a beautiful baby girl. Today they're as happy as can be. 0:27:53.400 --> 0:27:54.920 And I'm not saying if you don't have a child, 0:27:55.000 --> 0:27:57.439 that's the only reason. But I am saying we need 0:27:57.520 --> 0:28:02.760 to treat people right. Being disrespectful, being rude, being sarcastic, 0:28:02.880 --> 0:28:05.359 that's always going to keep us from God's best. And 0:28:05.440 --> 0:28:08.160 so I want to challenge again today, make a decision 0:28:08.240 --> 0:28:10.840 with me that you're going to be kind and courteous 0:28:11.200 --> 0:28:15.040 everywhere you go. Ask God to develop a greater gentleness 0:28:15.119 --> 0:28:19.560 on the inside. Learn to be understanding, not demanding. If 0:28:19.600 --> 0:28:21.600 you want to be more persuasive, you've got to make 0:28:21.640 --> 0:28:25.440 sure your words are pleasant. Remember, people respond to politeness, 0:28:26.000 --> 0:28:28.280 not to rudeness. And if you'll do your part and 0:28:28.359 --> 0:28:31.480 have a gentle spirit, taking time for people, treating them 0:28:31.480 --> 0:28:34.240 with respect and honor, I know God will do his part. 0:28:34.400 --> 0:28:36.680 He'll pour out his blessings in your life, and you'll 0:28:36.720 --> 0:28:39.520 not only be happier, but you'll see your relationships go 0:28:39.720 --> 0:28:42.239 higher and hire and get better and better. Amen, how 0:28:42.240 --> 0:28:45.680 many of you receive it today? We never like the 0:28:45.760 --> 0:28:49.080 courge on broadcast without giving you an opportunity to make 0:28:49.240 --> 0:28:51.920 Jesus the lord of your life. Would you pray with me? 0:28:52.560 --> 0:28:58.000 Just say, Lord Jesus, I'll repent of my sins. Come 0:28:58.080 --> 0:29:03.280 into my heart. I make you my Lord and savior. Friends, 0:29:03.320 --> 0:29:05.680 if you prayed that simple prayer, we believe you got 0:29:05.760 --> 0:29:08.680 born again. Get in a good Bible based church, keep 0:29:08.720 --> 0:29:11.680 God first place. He's gonna take you places that you've 0:29:11.760 --> 0:29:12.440 never dreamed of. 0:29:13.280 --> 0:29:16.680 Thank you for listening to the Joel Loustine podcast. Help 0:29:16.800 --> 0:29:19.480 us continue to share the message of hope with those 0:29:19.640 --> 0:29:23.480 all over the world. Visit Joeloustein dot com slash give 0:29:23.600 --> 0:29:25.240 Hope to give a gift today. 0:29:26.560 --> 0:29:29.480 Thanks so much for listening to today's message. I hope 0:29:29.520 --> 0:29:32.840 you'll subscribe so you can receive the latest podcast to 0:29:32.960 --> 0:29:36.120 keep you inspired all through the week. We're praying for you. 0:29:36.320 --> 0:29:38.720 I know God's best is still ahead. We'll see you 0:29:38.880 --> 0:29:39.320 next time. 0:29:46.520 --> 0:29:49.240 With millions of books on Amazon there's a reading feeling 0:29:49.320 --> 0:29:53.800 for everyone. 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